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Parenting

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Original poster

How do I explain that I didn't eat her?!

19 replies

Hansmummy · 15/08/2007 23:23

I have a 3 1/2 yo and she recently saw a pic of me at 9m pregnant. She asked where she was and Nana HELPFULLY explained that she was in my tummy, and my dh totally crumbled into sobs (which is something she does not do!) and asked why I had eaten her!
I then proceeded to explain that I hadn't etc, but now every time she wants to wear clothes that are too small, play with toys for babies, or do anything vaguely baby orientated that for size reasons she cannot do she keeps asking me to eat her so that she can be born again-help! Have tried ignoring, explaining and changing conversation topic but this won't go away! It's been going on for four months now!

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fingerwoman · 15/08/2007 23:25

aww you're going to have to explain how she got there I think

cylon · 15/08/2007 23:27

pretend to eat her, so she realises its nto possible?
introduce her to heavily pregnant woman, and then again to her babt?

MrsScavo · 15/08/2007 23:29

Bite the bullet and tell her the truth. It will be easier now than when she's older.

Someone might know of some good books. Anyone?

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Original poster

Hansmummy · 15/08/2007 23:33

He he he thank you, they've really made me laugh!

Feel bad in a way as there is no chance of another one ever so can't even show her what happens! I think she thinks v pregnant ladies are fat (sorry any v pregnant ladies!) and I'm the only person in the world that was horrid enough to put my baby in my tummy! Then again this is the child that warns all fish about me because I flushed her dead fish, while she was asleep yet somehow she knew, so she now tells all fish that mummy flushed her fish down the toilet, and then he DIED! I am truly horrid!

Hopefully we will meet a pregnant woman one day and all will be explained!

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fingerwoman · 15/08/2007 23:36

lol, there are books you can get that explain it in a child-friendly manner.

aloha · 15/08/2007 23:38

Tell her (and show her in a book) the difference between your stomach - where food goes - and your womb, which is the lovely cosy warm space where she grew as a baby. Tell her how babies are made. She's not too young. Earlier is better - less embarrassing.

Original poster

Hansmummy · 15/08/2007 23:38

Oh hurrah she loves her books-so that would def work! Thank you!

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Hulababy · 15/08/2007 23:41

At that age we were still just using the "growing from a seed in my tummy" route. DD knew that she started as a tiny seed, and one day, when mummy and daddy sdecided they wanted a baby, one of those tiny eggs began to grown and grow, and eventually turn into a baby. And we also talked briefly about how she got out.

Just answer each of her questions very simply and in a way she will understand. She may not need the whole works just yet and just be happy with a very basic explanation.

aloha · 15/08/2007 23:43

My ds was fascinated by simple pictures of our insides! You can get some great flap books but most don't show wombs

PeachesMcLean · 15/08/2007 23:45

Am thinking of getting something like this for DS, though sort of feel that's a bit of a cop out. I remember my mum got me a book, but the main thing I remember was the man in the cartoon had the most enormous big hairy beard!!!

Original poster

Hansmummy · 15/08/2007 23:58

That's the thing-I have no recollection whatsoever of my mum telling me anything! I feel awful because she was so scared of me for ages after that! Think explaining with book props is a good idea!

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Ellbell · 16/08/2007 00:28

Peaches... are you sure you're not getting mixed up with The Joy of Sex?

Ellbell · 16/08/2007 00:44

Oops, should have added a .

Hansmummy - I think definitely explain the difference between tummy (used for eating) and womb (where babies grow), using a book if possible. Good luck!

This reminded me of when I was heavily pg with dd2, and a friend asked dd1 (who was only 22 months when dd2 was born) what she thought mummy had in her tummy. She took a long look at my enormous pg belly and said... 'Cake?'!

ghosty · 16/08/2007 02:32

Little kids get so confused don't they?
You could get pregnant to teach your child the facts of life? Joking
DS was 3 and a half when I got pg with DD so he watched my tummy grow and all that ... this obviously could be a drastic course of action for you but it definitely helps for young children to meet and see pregnant women ... (and breastfeeding women for that matter).
My DD is now 3 and a half and she is convinced that she had DS in her tummy when he was a baby (DS is 7 LOL)
I think the best course of action is a book, like aloha suggests, showing the 'food tummy' and the womb ...
Also, "Mummy Laid An Egg" by Babette Cole is a fab book for little children on this subject. We read it to DS when I was pg with DD ...
You could, of course, tell her the truth - I know it sounds horrifying but when we eventually told DS the proper full on details of how babies are made (he was nearly 6 and he asked "BUT how exactly does the Daddy put the baby in the Mummy's tummy?") it was not as awful as I thought it would be and he took it all on board as if I had explained how a car engine works ...

ghosty · 16/08/2007 02:35

LOL Ellbell at your DD and 'cake'
When I was pg with DS my niece was sure that the brown line on my tummy was the zip that the doctor opened for the baby to come out

PeachesMcLean · 16/08/2007 11:45

Lol, ellbell. there were certainly lots of drawings of willies though and cross sections of uteruses (uteri?) but the thing that really freaked me out was that beard! Weird stuff.

Hulababy · 16/08/2007 17:07

We have the "Mummy laid an egg" book for 5yo DD when she next asks. Bought it after a time when she did ask, but then become distracted by something else before getting an answer. She hasn't asked again since so it is still in my room waiting.

Smithagain · 16/08/2007 21:27

DD1 asked the other day how she got into my tummy. She's just turned 5. I told her about there being a tiny egg inside me, which had been there for ages. And that daddies have some "special stuff" that makes the egg grow into a baby, when the mummy and daddy decide they'd like one. (Also that it doesn't always happen straight away.)

Mercifully, she didn't enquire how the special stuff got in there. She probably thinks we keep it in the medicine cabinet .

She accepted all of this as entirely reasonable.

Mind you, on the way home from town today she announced that she had twins in her tummy and they were just about to "pop out". Then insisted that we had better get home quick because she wouldn't be able to feed them both while she was riding her scooter

Carbonel · 16/08/2007 21:53

I agree - tell her how it all happens in a very basic way. it will undoubtedly get worse I had to explain to my 6 and 4 yr olds why i could not take them swimming during my period, what tampons are etc and they discussed it very loudly all day in great detail but at least I have done it (for now)

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