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Original poster

DS won’t sit still for story time

33 replies

AthollPlace · 12/10/2019 08:22

DS 22m has started messy play group. It always begins with a hello poem and a story, and ends with a singsong on the mat. DS absolutely will not participate - I’m trying to hold him on my lap and he’s whinging and twisting around trying to escape. If I let go he wanders off to play. The other children (ages 18-36m) all sit nicely and look interested while their mummies clap their hands and use the story props that have been handed out, and they listen and smile when the group leader says their name in the hello poem.

Yesterday the group leader said could I please keep DS on the mat until everyone is ready to start playing, because he’s messing up the prepared play areas before anyone else has a chance to use them. So should I pin him down and let him wriggle and cry?

I’m not sure why he won’t participate. At home he sits on my lap nicely for story after story. I’m slightly concerned that every other child is interested and participates, even those who are younger than DS.

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Greyworm · 12/10/2019 08:28

Don't pin him down. I'm surprised the people who run this class find it surprising that a 22month old can't sit still. Some three-four year olds can't sit for story time! It's not unusual. If you are feeling self conscious, can you accidentally arrive 10 mins late each time to miss the song. I think the organisers should have an area where free play can happen.

Littlefish · 12/10/2019 08:33

Find another group! One which has appropriate expectations for, and accommodates, all children!

HappydaysArehere · 12/10/2019 08:41

Oh! Dear, Poor you. He is a baby and babies don’t always follow our rules. Can you take a favourite toy with you to distract him from the inviting play area. Has he a teddy or something similar who wants to hear that story? Don’t worry. Have a word with the group leader and ask her for any suggestions. If he has just started everything is new and exciting. He will probably settle down, as he does at home, when the novelty wears off!!! Meanwhile, he is changing rapidly as he makes sense of the world.

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insancerre · 12/10/2019 08:46

It’s not him
It’s them
They have unrealistic expectations of children’s behaviour
I’d be tempted to find another group

Electrocute1980 · 12/10/2019 08:49

This was my DS! However, the teacher at our group didn't have unrealistic expectations of small children sitting still and listening. I second the idea of finding another group!

Carparkticket · 12/10/2019 08:53

This is me. Yours is not the only one not to sit still, there are a bunch of us that simply don’t attend anymore so you don’t see us
Solidarity

thethoughtfox · 12/10/2019 08:55

He's not supposed to be able to. He's a baby. Don't worry.

Original poster

AthollPlace · 12/10/2019 09:13

I just feel like it’s only my DS who won’t sit nicely! But of course he doesn’t want to sit on the mat for a story when there’s a room full of paint, play dough, water, sand, jelly, foam...

The organiser is very into Instagram, she photographs all her “invitations to play” and uploads them with cutesy captions about #babyplay and #playmatters. Then DS ruins them. On “forest theme” week he started waving the trees (big branches) around and they had to be removed. On “ocean theme” week he threw the rocks that represented a cliff and they had to be removed. Then he slopped ocean blue jelly on the floor and a mum slipped over. He put the little wooden Grimms people in the cinnamon scented autumnal playdough. He’s the only one who is causing this disruption!

OP posts:

insancerre · 12/10/2019 09:26

The organiser has no idea
Messy play is about getting messy and exploring
It’s not meant to look good
I’d definitely find another group

Gillian1980 · 12/10/2019 09:44

Agree with others - the organiser has unrealistic expectations! I’d eith ignore her or find another group.

MaryLane93 · 12/10/2019 10:16

Another one for join another group!

ParadiseLaundry · 12/10/2019 10:36

I would find this group so annoying! I would just want them to bloody well get on with it. DS is nearly 4 now but at that age definitely wouldn't sit for that. I'm surprised they even expect them to to be honest!

Minai · 12/10/2019 14:02

This is my son! I always feel like I’m the only one and everyone else’s kid is sitting there listening to the story! The group leader should be more understanding. Short of physically restraining him what can you do?!

BendingSpoons · 12/10/2019 14:06

I don't think they understand messy play. Slopping jelly on the floor and mixing it all up is normal. As is struggling to concentrate on a boring story when you can see all the fun stuff. Maybe arrive late as a PP said.

Clickncollect · 12/10/2019 14:07

Lol, this was my son!! I gave a shit but nobody else batted an eyelid. I would not have returned to that toddler group if that was the case

RaspberryBubblegum · 12/10/2019 14:09

I would definitely find another group. My DD was exactly the same at the same age, would not sit for singing time and would run up and down the room was embarrassing but the leaders of the group didn't care, it's totally normal. She's in nursery now and the teachers say she's well behaved and sits well for storytime. I really wouldn't worry.

EleanorReally · 12/10/2019 14:10

My dd was the same, I didn't go back, and realised it was their expectations which were out of tune

Janaih · 12/10/2019 14:10

group leader sounds awful!

Tonkerbea · 12/10/2019 14:11

Your son on the other hand sounds fun. Toddlers bring the anarchy.

MamaFlintstone · 12/10/2019 14:12

My DD 23 months has never sat still for story time at any group we’ve ever been to, especially if there’s other stuff she could be getting into. I know the feeling of it seeming like everyone else’s is sitting nicely except yours! I’d find a different group.

OfDragonsDeep · 12/10/2019 14:13

This was my child. We don’t attend groups like this

velocitygirl7 · 12/10/2019 14:16

The group sounds shit! Excuse my language but the person leading it sounds like she is clueless and only interested in self promotion.
Sit him in a high chair at a table and give him a huge pile of cornflour mixed with water, it's magical stuff.
Honestly those sort of groups (I realised this too late) are a waste of time & money and if it's stressing you out, why bother?!
Have a bit of relaxed messy play at home and then spend your money on coffee & cake with a friend!

velocitygirl7 · 12/10/2019 14:18

Also, your son sounds great. Neither of mine ever complied with that sort of nonsense and yet my eldest has just started uni and is a sensible, well rounded fun individual.

MrTumbleTumble · 12/10/2019 14:20

Definitely time to find another group. We go to a group with kids of the same age and not one of them sits still for the whole class. The group leader just leaves them to it and encourages them to join in when they show interest.

isittheholidaysyet · 12/10/2019 14:23

Yes. This was DS.

He learnt to walk at 11 months and never sat for an organised story/song time from that point on.

From about 2 and a half he got better and could be persuaded to climb all over me, with snacks, whilst his little brother joined in perfectly behaved.
I put him in nursery so I could take his brother to these things.

He's 14 now and developing a love for English literature, still couldn't give a flying f for song time!

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