Little background info. I am a single mum of 3 girls, 12, 5 and 4. Their father (biological to my 2 youngest and adopted my oldest) has severe mental health issues which has had detrimental effects on my oldest daughter who is now undergoing therapy for this because of his behaviour (amongst other school related problems) She would cry when it was time for contact and never wanted to go. In march of this year i received a call from social work telling me he had threatened to kill me and my girls. She wrote to the court and told them how she didn't want to see him again. After a lengthy court hearing it was concluded that he had threatened to kill myself but not the girls and his contact was reinstated by the courts for my 2 younger ones. He has told my oldest daughter to skip school and lie to me and that at 12 years old he would take her to his friend to get her tongue pierced absolutely against my wishes. He lets her do what she wants when she wants and has even let her drink alcohol. I have recently taken her phone off her and stopped her access to all things social (which was always supervised by myself) because of her bad behaviour and her acting out. She's now just told me she wants to move in with my ex after everything that's happened and the only reason that i can think of is that she would get away with everything. Sorry for the long post but I'm wondering if anyone has any experience of their child wanting to live with the non residential parent at a similar age and if this has ever been allowed to happen. I know that it wouldn't be in her best interests given the history of their relationship and she has only just started seeing him again. We have always had a fantastic, really close relationship but recently since i have been laying down the law as to what she can and can't do/wear it's as tho she hates me and although i know she loves me it does hurt sometimes when she treats me the way she does.