Hi all this is my first post so please be gentle haha. Basically I'm at my wits end. It's a long one guys.
So my children's father has a talent for not showing up and then blaming me. Starting with the registration of my son's birth two years ago. He claimed I didn't tell him about the appointment which backfired on him as soon as I sent him a screen shot of the message.
I stopped contact with him last year for about 4 month during this time I tried to get him to attend mediation but he wouldn't.
I eventually gave in just after Xmas and it seemed that he turned a corner. He showed up regularly and had the kids for the dag and even asked to have them an extra here and there.
In the past few months though he's gradually been slipping back into his old ways. I can't remember the last time he asked for them an extra day, he's give lame excuses about why he can't pick the up untill 2 in the afternoon (like he has to go shopping).
A couple of weeks ago my car was in the garage so I told him the time I will be leaving the house so that I could get a bus to where I needed to be. He was late, if already gone kids in tow and again he blames me.
So now this week. It's his birthday today. He text me earlier in the week and asked if he could swap his day to today as his car is in the garage tomorrow. (He normally has them 9-8 on a saturday). My response was that he could have them today no problem but as I have my usual plans on saturday morning he needs to have them and I will drop them off.
Yesterday my car broke down so I suggested he has them today and keep them overnight. But he wont because he has plans for his birthday. I then sent him instructions of how he can take a bus to my house to collect the children. At this point he seems to have forgotten all about having them today. He planted his feet and say I should drop them off like I said I would ( before my car broke). And I also would like to know why he thinks I should cover the travel cost for him to see them. I've now said he can see them when they are 18 because in sick of him letti g them down and having to console unnecessarily upset kids even though I know this move will upset them too I'm just hoping they get over it. They ask to see him several times a week but he has no interest in this and won't even video call them. It's heart breaking to watch and I feel powerless. Family court is not an option as I can't afford it and he would ignor it anyway. If anyone has any advice is really appreciate it.