Husband find it boring

[3LoudBoys]

My husband said he finds being a father boring. Watching them play football is boring, reading to them is boring, playing with them is boring, everything to him is boring! I am, his job is, lack of money etc.

I'm quite hurt by his comments about the children. 😒 We have 3 boys under the age of 10.

Your husband is the common factor here. Do you think he may have depression? Tell him to see his gp and to find something he enjoys doing to do with the kids.

It's hard to tell from your post exactly what the problem is. He's either struggling with life and needs some proper support with his feelings (medication, counselling) - or he's being a twat and needs to adult up. Being a grown up can be boring. Lots of aspects of parenting are boring. You crack on as best you can because that's what adults do, try and find ways to alleviate it where possible. He can try and find things he prefers doing with the kids, perhaps he can look into changing jobs - but he doesn't get to abdicate responsibility for doing his it, even if it's boring.

Have his feelings changed recently? Has he otherwise been fairly engaged and functional in the past? Does this problem seem debilitating or is he just moaning? You and he need to work out the answers to those questions to figure out how to improve the situation.

Well, he's not wrong about many aspects of parenting, to be truthful, though it's not a particularly helpful position to adopt, or to be so vocal about -- but if he's extended this to his job, his marriage etc, then it's not just that he's expressing frustration with the sheer grind of small children, and @EdgarAllenSloe's post is sensible.

Thank you for your replies.

He just wants to sit at home and look at his phone.

He hates paying for the kids, wants to go on holiday without them, doesn't want to take them to sports. It's so frustrating, he doesn't appreciate what he has. 😣

Does he socialise at all either with or without you? Does he do any exercise or eat well?

Why did he agree to have 3 kids if he finds parenting boring? Has he always felt like this or is it new? As pp have said, I’m wondering if he’s depressed- I really struggle to enjoy anything, even my wonderful DD, when I’m depressed

Is this a change in his behaviour ?

If it is typical, what are you, and the boys getting from him being there, dragging the mood down all the time ?
If it is a change, then he needs to be persuaded to see his Doctor.

really struggle to enjoy anything, even my wonderful DD, when I’m depressed. Me too riot. It's sometimes got to the point where I just want to lie on the settee all day and ignore the DC before I've realised what's wrong.

I’ve definitely been there, @JiltedJohnsJulie, hugs to you