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Parenting

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Original poster

Can’t stop thinking what if

4 replies

Garveymum · 04/08/2019 22:24

Hi, I am consumed with guilt, worry and anxiety and feel like the worlds worst mom.
A few weeks ago I took my seven month old son to watch his dad play a baseball game and while he was in his stroller the ball hit it really hard and fast. He was fine as the stroller had the cover on so was protected but it was at the level where his head was. It happened so fast I couldn’t stop it. I have been beating myself up ever since. I wish I hadn’t taken him or had sat somewhere else. My husband says it was just a freak unlucky accident and I have to focus on the fact that all was ok but I can’t help thinking what if. If the stroller hadn’t been covered he could have been seriously injured or worse. Any words of support would be appreciated as the guilt is eating me up.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

SpoonBlender · 04/08/2019 22:29

Do you have other anxieties, or is it fixated on this one event?

If the latter, I'd recommend reading and acting on a cognitive behavioural therapy book - www.amazon.com/dp/B00KFEJJZ8?tag=mumsnetforu03-21 is good. It'll teach you how to close off the circular thinking that makes this so awful.

If the former, you should talk to your family doctor about anxiety and explain how it's consuming you. And also get a CBT book/course.

Tigger001 · 04/08/2019 22:44

I think it's easy to over play these things on our minds, but he was fine and it all worked out ok. You are most definitely not a rubbish mum because of this.

Do you over worry about other things?

Garveymom · 04/08/2019 22:58

Thanks for the book recommendation spoonblender.

I have definitely become more anxious since having my son but I think this has just hit me really hard as it could have been such a different outcome and all it took was an instant. If I hadn’t put the cover on, if the stroller had been facing a different direction etc etc. I know hindsight is a wonderful thing but I just wish I could go back and sat somewhere else or not gone. Everyone around me was in shock aswell, it could easily have hit their kids who were there watching. Someone above was looking out for us that day and I am so so thankful that all was ok but it is still so hard to get over.

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bluebell34567 · 04/08/2019 23:17

you are a new mum. this will be an experience for you. next time you will be careful where and how to put your baby.
you were very lucky. all is well, so dont worry anymore.
everyone has near miss experiences.

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