I have to say it and I've got nowhere else to...

[Jamarcus]

Hi,

So this is probably daft but I need to say out loud. Since becoming a dad a lot of things bother me relating to news stories regarding children being mistreated or even worse, as in todays news story regarding the twins being killed by thier mother.

Obviously these things have always been sad and terrible, but I literally suffer and cant sleep now. The poor little girl that was kept in a bed made into a cage and was strangled literally bought me to tears. I didnt sleep for weeks after thinking about the poor thing.

These twins today - saw the video of them and I'm literally a wreck. Never been like this before but really suffering. Beautiful little girls and it devastates me.

Anyway, I know theres nothing anyone can do about it but I just wanted to get it off my chest. I wish I could have done something.

I think becoming a parent really makes you realise how precious children are. I remember being distraught over the murders of Holly and Jessica in Soham many years ago because I was a new mum.

I know what you mean. It makes me realise what a lottery life is and that you're so lucky if you are born into a family with a loving parent or parents. Since having my lo my heart just breaks thinking of those poor vulnerable children who are mistreated and harmed. Sadly it's the way of the world and we have no control over it. All we can do is do the best by our own children and be vigilant about protecting them and other children close to us. No advice, just saying that I get how you feel.

It is horrific when you start to hear how some poor children live

Setting up a small, but regular donation/ standing order to charities such as NSPCC / Childline / Action for Children / Barnados / The Children's Society / etc goes a long way to helping them budget to be able to employ more staff / man the phone lines / have staff available to support families when needed.

I don't know if this will help but these feelings are extremely common after having your own babies. It brings out a part of us we didn't know existed.

The only advice I can give is to avoid the news, don't click on the links to distressing child stories and ride it out. If it consumes you then speak to your GP.

I was in pieces after reading the news reports today about the Louise Port on judgement today and saw the video on the BBC News website of one of the little girls innocent last moments.
I completely understand, it affects me so much more.

*Louise Porton

I haven't watched the news since I was pregnant - there's too much sadness. I really can't cope with anything terrible to do with children now - the Handmaid's Take is proving to be a particularly trying watch.

We can't watch anything at all relating to child mistreatment. Not one thing. A lot of ITV dramas are out!

There was an expose on Irish TV last week about this creche who were rough handling kids and leaving them in rooms alone as punishment etc and it's been all over the news. I've been so upset over it!

DH is the exact same. He'll go WELL WE'RE CLEARLY NOT WATCHING THAT!

I get it. I'm exactly the same since having dc.

Before these stories were upsetting but they hit you in a totally different way once you've had your own dc. I suppose because we can empathise more?

The one about the Mexican man and his dc who drowned trying to get to America had me in peices. All I could picture was dp and ds in that scenario and just thought there but for the grace of God go I.

The ones about people intentionality being cruel to children just make me so very very angry and confused.

I even look at my maternal grandmother very differently knowing how she treated my own dm (she was a big fan of the slipper and the cane). I just don't understand how people could do that to their own children

We had exactly the same conversation last night about this news story. Both dh and I found it really upsetting. You just imagine your own kids at that age and it physically hurts to think of what happened to these girls. We had to stop talking about it in the end as it upset us both a lot

I just heard about it today. I am shocked at the evil in this world. Children are precious so precious I can't honestly stop thinking of those poor children. 35 years!! Not enough. It is just too upsetting what goes on in this world.

I get upset too. I mean it’s always been upsetting, but having your own makes it much more real and I always end up thinking about my own son. I’m absolutely not a person who cries often or gets upset easily but nowadays I’m a lot more sensitive.

The death of Shamima Begum’s son really upset me. My son is also around the same age as Charlie Gard.

A few weeks ago I visited a graveyard and saw a stone for two little boys from the same family in the 19th century, next to another one for a little boy. Their names were Howard, Horatio and William. I went into the church and lit a candle for them. I’m an atheist but I just thought their mum might have liked it if someone remembered them. And now I’m crying again!!

I avoid certain stories but it makes me feel like a bit of a dick sometimes when I do so.

I don't understand why it affects new parents so much. I don't have children, yet am just as affected by these murders, mistreatments and so on.