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Parenting

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Original poster

Dd (4.3/4) swore today.

17 replies

Withnailandaye · 29/07/2019 22:15

Ok I'm worried about posting this incase I get torn apart but could really do with some advice.

We were out today in the car and I stopped to let someone pass, the car jerked a little bit and dd said "fucking car!" 😳

I told her (probably wrongly but I didn't know what else to say I was so shocked) that it was a bad word that only grown ups use and children aren't allowed to say that (I know.. I've probably made it seem more appealing now 🙄)

I try not to use bad language around dd. Like most people the odd one comes out now and again but I thought I was doing well to at least keep it hushed.
Well I was wrong.

Now I have images of her saying it at school when she starts in Sep and us getting pulled into see the head teacher 😳

Motified.

What can I do to make this better??
(Aside from never swearing again..)

I wish I just ignored it and she may have just forgotten but now I'm scared that I made it a big deal it's 'stuck' more if that makes sense

OP posts:

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tessiegirl · 29/07/2019 22:17

Don't worry about it. Dd swears but we ignore her and hope it will stop if she doesn't get attention.

zebrapig · 29/07/2019 22:21

Our DD is 4.5 and the other week she overheard DH calling 18mo DS a knobhead for something in jest. She immediately repeated what he said and then walked round going knobby, knob, knob, knob. It was quite funny tbh but we have had a chat with her about how some words should only be used by grownups and definitely not when anyone else is around/in public. She's not done it again since.

hannah1992 · 29/07/2019 22:34

I think all kids do it at some point. School wouldnt be shocked by it. It would be a quiet word after school just to make you aware.

My dd 3 witnessed me being distracted, whilst pouring water from the kettle into my cup, by dd8. I spilt some on my hand and was saying shit shit shit while running it under the cold tap. Later on that day dd3 was playing with toy kitchen and decided to act out the part! She "poured" her toy kettle water over her hand and said shit shit shit at she went to her sink!

Also my friends son when he was about 2 witnessed a teen sticking his middle finger up at somebody else in the street and the person laughed. He then thought it was a good game to go round flagging everyone off. Much to my friends embarrassment

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Original poster

Withnailandaye · 29/07/2019 22:38

Ah these replys make me feel better!
Thank you!

So, if it happens again should i just ignore or reiterate what I said today?

OP posts:

Wildorchidz · 29/07/2019 22:39

Ignore!!!!

User2222 · 29/07/2019 22:44

Many years ago my DD called her teddy bear a bitch. She was 4. I didn't make a fuss of it and she never said it again. Many of my friends children have had at least one swearing incident. It's not uncommon.

negomi90 · 29/07/2019 22:45

ignore. If you reiterate then you risk it becoming a thing, and she'll do it to get a rise out of you and other people.

Original poster

Withnailandaye · 29/07/2019 22:46

Ok. Noted.
Thanks everyone

OP posts:

ifoundthebread · 29/07/2019 22:47

My dp was helping dd, aged 4, get dressed for school. He tried to put her dress on backwards and her response was 'no dad, the zip goes at the front. You always have been a bit of a knob head haven't you' we just brushed it off and said it wasn't a very nice thing to call someone who made a mistake. We laughed about it after though 😂

LizzieSiddal · 29/07/2019 22:53

So, if it happens again should i just ignore or reiterate what I said today?

I would reiterate what you said today, which was perfect. If you ignore it, she may repeat at school and they won’t ignore it there, she’ll be told off.

My Dd was a bit younger than yours when we had a sweaty incident. One very early morning, we were all in bed, Dd aged 3, me and Dh.
The cat walked in and Dd said “fucking cat, she was on the table”
I just starting singing “lucky cat, was on the table, lucky cat was on the table”. She joined in and never repeated the fuck word again.

Dh later told me he’d found the cat, on the table and just mumbled the swearing, but Dd obviously picked it up.

Rainbowknickers · 29/07/2019 22:54

Same thing happened to me once with my youngest
I just ignored her saying it and told her that a REALLY naughty word was ‘knickerbockerglory’
Every time she said it I did the whole shocked face and a ‘wow dd I can’t believe you’ve just said such a naughty word!’
She loved it and could shout it all she liked
A child shouting that was much better than ‘oh fuck’!

GiggleMcDimples · 29/07/2019 22:55

DSis went to pick up DNephew(3) from nursery a couple of months ago, and realising he looked a bit uncomfortable, she asked him if he was ok, and in front of the other parents and teachers he said "no, I think I need a shit".

SansaryaAgain · 29/07/2019 23:00

DS once asked me if we were getting "the fucking bus" home. It was then that I realised I needed to stop swearing every time the bus was late...

RoLaren · 29/07/2019 23:09

A fly came buzzing in the window today and my two year old said: 'Peace off, fly!' Definitely got that one from his Dad!

Iputthescrewinthetuna · 29/07/2019 23:21

DD1, I was messing around with Exp (together at the time) I spelt out the word twat...thinking I was clever managing to swear in front of just turned 2 year old dd. She then nodded her head and said 'twat' wasn't sure whether to cry because I was so mortified or cheer because she was genius spelling words at barely 2 years old.

My DD2 when she was 3 said 'it is bloody hot' I told her she shouldn't say that word so she said 'oh, its bloody cold then'

DD3, I was mortified when I got home from work and she said 'I fucking find glass'
I was so angry at DP, I thought he had dropped a glass and kept finding glass. It turns out she wanted me to get her 'magnifying glass'

I also have a love for Tom Hanks. This is very outing! DD looked at the signed photos on wall (Don't judge my photos) and said 'wanker' when I asked her what she said she said 'tom wanker'
Not sure if that is because DP calls him one when I am not around or if she genuinely and innocently got confused with his name!

Di11y · 30/07/2019 13:27

dd said "fucksake" loudly in the public loos when someone else was there. my instinct was to ignore but I didn't want the random lady to think it was normal so told her off. big mistake, whenever she was really mad at me she shouted it.

in the end spoke to her about it, how it upsets people so say it in private only, and discussed other phrases - got her shouting/practicing "I'm really angry today!"

nomushrooms · 31/07/2019 12:26

Don’t worry about school; we’re pretty good at spotting the families where swear words are part of language, and normal families who sip up every now and then.

We normally have a little giggle in the staffroom when a particularly small and innocent looking one calls a teddy a ‘little fucker’ or says ‘oh crap’ when they drop something 😂

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