New parents. Issues with my own Parents.

[Minicruiser]

Hi, my husband and I are about to have our first baby girl anyday now.

Unfortunately I have issues not with the in-laws who are lovely but my own parents. Firstly they expect to babysit while I return to work but they are Alcoholics and recent behaviour has demonstrated I'm not going to be willing to leave baby with them unattended. Maybe not ever. So I found a nursery place for her.

They have taken to 'popping by' everyday without warning. Just 'helping out' round the house even if it is unwanted. Last week they had another meltdown and started shouting at me about how they hate my husband to the point I was sick and they wouldn't leave. I almost went into early labor and husband had to come back from work to protect me.

I feel unsafe in my own home and I'm fed up of them, their drinking and pathetic behaviour following it.

My sister has agreed to speak to them tomorrow and my husband is going to work from home and set some boundaries if they try to visit again.

I just want to know if anyone has any advice on the situation.

It's more than a Granzilla problem of excited Grandparents.

Do you want to see them again? You could go no contact.

Lock the doors. Do you even want them coming round?

Agreed, they are toxic and making you unwell. What are they adding to your life? Do you want your innocent child to see then shouting at you, about how they hate her father? Do you want them to feel unsafe too?
Of course not. NC is hard and horrible but you don't deserve to be treated like this.

Thanks for your comments. I'm ok with occasional managed contact not at my house so it is easier for us to leave that way. But I'm worried how they are going to take it as before now it was easier to just let them get their own way. Looking back I realise you reap what you sow and I should have set boundaries ages ago.

I would definitely keep your doors locked. But you really need to set the expectations now before your baby daughter arrives as you simply do not need the additional stress or worry.

Can you arrange to meet them every or every other Saturday at a cafe or something. Then they have a time in their minds that they are seeing their grandchild and if you can't go send DH, then slowly pull back the meetings if you need to once they are out of the habit of coming to the house

Blinds up, door locked, phone off. Police if you feel threatened. You owe them nothing. You owe your dc safety and the benefit of your good mental health...
Meet them in a local cafe in a public setting. Keep them out of your home.