Can't cope - 1 year old tantrums

[Cuppa12345]

I have a 13 month old daughter, my first born. The last week she has been having what appear to be temper tantrums which are increasing in severity. They seem to be all the time, even just when she's sitting there playing she'll suddenly start wailing and kicking her legs out violently, throwing herself on the ground. We thought she was teething but I can't imagine it's just that. Her sleep is disrupted too. If I move an inch away from her, she'll kick off.

I'm 5 months pregnant, working full time and can't cope at the moment.

She is like a completely different baby. Up until now we have been so lucky... She's been calm, quiet, smiley, happy and slept really well on the whole. A few early waking but generally asleep 7/7.30 to 7am.

Now she's awake until 9pm or even 10pm screaming, and gets herself so worked up she then can't sleep. I'm not letting her cry it out but trying a variety of things... Pick up put down, singing, rubbing her back, white noise, leaving her for up to 5 mins. Even took her for a drive two nights ago as she was so worked up she was totally past sleep.

Because she's been great for the last 12 months, I'm not sure what to do. She hits, throws stuff, scratches. It's madness.

She doesn't want her dad, just screams for me. But then screams when I have her. She's well fed, clean bum, not thirsty, no temperature. Can't work it out at all.

Looking online, it could potentially be separation anxiety but that doesn't seem to fit completely.

Mainly I try distracting her and cuddles and softly speaking to her to calm down and rocking, but it's really starting to get me down and I can't cope. I thought it might be the heat but it's been cooler today and yesterday and no different!

Help! Any ideas?

It could be that she is picking up on the pregnancy? As for dealing with the tantrums I would pick something and stick to it for a couple of days to see if it works (rather than switching between things).

This is a tough time, I've had it with my girls at different ages and I'm really not sure what caused it in either of them but just wanted to share that it does pass. It's not forever.

Couple of things helped such as whichever bedtime method we decided on, stick to it like glue, show her consistency and what is currently unfamiliar will start to become familiar and a routine. Also we read the no cry sleep solution which was helpful.

Same applies for managing difficult behaviour, whichever tactic you decide on, keep it up. We made the big mistake with our first of abandoning our preferred approach after a few days because it seemed too hard to keep up but ultimately went back to it after a few weeks of tearing our hair out in frustration with other approaches.

Stay strong. You can do this.

What was it you tried itseasy?

You have my sympathy as my 13 month old also has tantrums (although has always had a very full on temperament) but I don't have to worry about a pregnancy on top of it .

One thing that stood out to me is about the evening meltdowns. Could overtiredness be contributing? My LO is still on two naps (one long and one short) and just has meltdown upon meltdown when he's tired.

Mine is still on two naps too most of the time, sometimes one if she misses the first one but we tend to go with her. if we try to put her down the short morning one and she doesn't want it, all hell breaks loose again. Sometimes shes happy with staying up til 12/12.30and sleeping til 3 but that's only been once or twice!

She's always been so different to this. This just seems like I have someone else's baby.

Thanks everyone for your advice. She's back at the childminders next week after a week off so at least I can go back to work for a break!