Worried the kids in my sons nursery don't like him :(

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My little boy has been in school nursery almost a year now, and will heading into reception in September. His birthday is 27th August and this makes him the youngest in his class having just scraped into this school year, it also makes him a YEAR younger than a lot of the other kids in his class. I have spoken to his teacher a few times over the course of the year as I have worried about his behaviour at times and have just wanted to make sure he's okay in nursery. By "behaviour" its mostly silliness. He gets quite excited about things and this can make him be a bit over the top i.e if he was playing in water he might splash a bit too much with excitement or maybe throw sand in excitement. He's not one for hitting or biting etc its literally hyperactivity which seems to reduce his ability to listen and follow instructions and play within boundaries which he usually does. So I was reassured that if there was a problem I would be pulled in for a chat and that made me feel much better as this hadn't happened. His teacher explained that as he is the youngest they don't expect him to be where the older kids are, especially emotionally. Anyway a while ago his dad had gone to a craft session with him at school and he overheard a little one saying thats (name)...hes naughty... I kind of brushed it off but then today in the park we saw one of his classmates and my little one was so excited to see him he shouted his name and the little boy went all shy to his mum... his mum said oh aren't you going to say hi? and he said "no, he's naughty"... I felt devastated... if other little ones in his class are picking up on his behaviour what are the teachers not telling me? I am worried sick about him starting reception in September having visions of him having his lunch alone and nobody to play with at break times if the other kids in his class are the same as this little one was. He gets so excited to see everyone and sees everyone as his friend. He is the most friendly little boy in the world and I just feel a really awful ache in my chest about the whole thing :( I might sound like I'm overreacting but as a first time mum I have struggled not to compare my little boy to other kids from the get go and I just want him to enjoy school, have lots of friends and be happy! Has anyone else experienced anything like this or have an excitable little one like mine?

I haven’t experienced this, but my youngest ds has 3 boys who were in his nursery class who he referred to as “naughty”. By mid reception he was friends with 2 of them (and they were less often “naughty”). Friendship groups change at the start of reception, lots of new children join the group and existing children learn how to fit in with the sort of behaviour their peers demonstrate/ expect. I wouldn’t worry, but I’d maybe have a word with his new teacher about supporting him with this, and a word with your ds about how to behave in school. I don’t necessarily think his age is the main factor.

Can you keep him back a year?

Remember that a child's perspective of naughty will be different from the teachers. For example it could have just been he took 5 seconds longer to be quiet when the group was asked to listen, he could of tried to go outside without his shoes (forgot) or spilled his juice.

But if he is naughty then hopefully school will help, seeing how the other kids behave (hopefully the good ones!) and him naturally maturing.

Yes he's young, some kids will be nearly a year older, most will not be and what you describe is personality not age related. He will be fine though. I'm an August birthday.

Aww it's so hard when things like this happen.

Perhaps ask the teacher who he normally plays with? I'm sure he has a group of friends. At a similar age, my son told me he didn't play with anyone - I was so sad thinking of him all alone. I mentioned it to the nursery teacher who was aghast! She rattled off a list of kids he played with.

Also, young children do have a bit of a strange perspective of "naughty". My son was adamant that a little girl in his drama group was "naughty" because she was making noise when they were in the wings.

I helped out and said child was far from naughty and neither was she noisy! Also, my son played with her loads in the dressing room

Thanks everyone! His health visitor actually went to school and observed him for the morning today... I didn’t realise this was happening so soon but anyway she gave me a call and I feel so much better after hearing all the wonderful things she said about him. She said his teacher spoke really highly of him and she watched him manage challenging situations like another little person drawing on his drawing and he managed this really maturely and went and got an adult rather than getting upset which I felt really proud of! She watched him get ready for snack time, wash his hands and go and sit and wait patiently where he needed to be then sensibly buttered crackers by himself. Doesn’t sound like much but I had a mental image of him just being wild all the time before but to hear his health visitor and teacher refer to him as a “delight” and to have them compliment his manners and things like that I just feel over the moon! She watched other little ones come over and play with him and said his imaginary play is wonderful I could honestly go on for ages she was really raving about him! She said she’s sure he has his moments but that other children in his class are just that bit older and have had more time to practice working their emotions out and that makes sense to me. I’m no longer worrying about him sitting alone at lunch in September or having nobody to play with! What a relief! 😊😊😊

Ah that's great, very happy for you and him op. My dd was the youngest in the class, late August birthday. I was worried too, for various reasons but she did amazing and is now a happy well adjusted adult!

That's great news! Sounds like a good wee guy!