Incident at school, to expect contact?

[youlemming]

My daughter was physically bullied in the school toilet by a girl in the year above today.
It sounds like the teachers dealt with it quickly when she went back to class and told them.

Would you expect contact from the school about it just to be informed?
I'm not expecting details on how it's been dealt with.

I work full time so don't often do the drop off or pick up so there's not the opportunity for the teacher to say anything at the end of the day.

DD is ok just quite confused and shocked someone would do that without warning and any prior interaction with the other girl.
DD is quite naive and just doesn't get why people are not always nice to each other.

How old are they?

What actually happened OP? Makes a massive difference as to whether the school should contact you.

Is this a one off incident? If so, she wasn't bullied.

Yr 4 and 5, I didn't know what else to call it apart from bullied as all the other words that come to mind sounded too harsh.
She was pushed into the wall, hit in the back and head and splashed with water, prevented from leaving and had the lights turned off and the door held shut, all while being laughed at.

Hopefully it is a one off

She was assaulted and the school should absolutely have let you know!

So she was assaulted then ?

Any chance you would go to the police ? If it happened to you in the street what would you do?

Assaulted was one thing that came to mind but I was worried that it would be taken as over dramatic.

She's not one to exaggerate so I believe her completely on what happened.
It sounds like her teacher reassured her that she did the right thing in telling them, DD would worry she was causing trouble or telling tales as she's a bit of a worrier.

I would have expected to be told.

I don't think I'd be calling the police...

I can understand her being worried, do you think the police should be involved ?
I would ring for an appointment, take the afternoon off work, and see how they plan to deal with it, your child should be able to be safe in school

Oh your poor DD, yes, I would have expected to be told.

How old are they.

If it was a one off incident then it’s not bullying, it’s an incident. I wouldn’t expect to be told about it unless your dd had injuries you needed to know about or she was especially upset.

Yes I would have expected to be told. I've had my daughter's head of year (secondary) on the phone for much less. He called to make sure I knew, asked how she was and let me know he was on the case and that the perpetrator had been dealt with.

I'm a teacher. I would definitely inform the parent. Ask for a meeting tomorrow to find out what happened.

Oh your poor daughter, that is horrid. What a horrible incident?

Yes I most definitely would have expected to have been informed.

Unless an incident is minor or genuinely unintentional, these things should happen:
Inform victims parent
Inform perpetrators parent
Some form of consequence (this might be a sanction, restorative justice etc)
Some planning/thinking around how to avoid a similar incident

You wouldn't necessarily be aware of all of this, but this is generally what should happen.

At the very least i would be going into school and asking what happened, and what has been done about it.

Yes I would expect to be told. Ring the school first thing in the morning.
Be strong and take positive action for your daughter. Whilst acknowledging it is very upsetting do not also teach her to be upset and anxious about it. She will feed off you how to act. It's upsetting, it's terrible behaviour never to be repeated but move on from it.
For this incident I wouldn't be going to the police.