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Feeling a bit lost! BF, solids, sleep and return to work.

7 replies

birdybirdbird · 24/06/2019 13:43

My LO is 9 months old and I’m just feeling bit lost! I’m going back to work very soon and am feeling like we’re a transition point generally but I’m not where to go with changing routines etc etc. The HV basically told me to go away and not come back til his 10 month review the last I got him weighed (at Drs request when investigating CMPA). So apologies, this is long...

He’s on 3 meals a day and will usually have 2/3-whole pouch or 2 big ice cubes of home made stuff. Then some finger foods alongside and/or yoghurt and fruit afterwards. I’ve no idea if this is a ‘good’ amount or not but he’s generally keen to eat and try things.
He’s still breast fed, having been combo fed since birth but it turns out he has CMPA and he hates the special formulas. In fact, it has given him a milk drinking aversion and he won’t even take expressed milk. He currently has around 6-8 breast feeds a day. This seems like a lot still compared to friends but is a considerable improvement on the 10-11 we were on a month ago! When I’m at work he’s just going to have to have solids and water due to his milk aversion. I’m not too worried about this - I’m only doing 2.5 days, he’ll survive! DH does plan to keep offering him milk though in case he takes it.

Our day currently looks like this. The timings are a range as, although he has settled into his own natural pattern, it seems to be fairly flexible.

Last night time feed: 4-5am
Wakes up: 5.45 - 6.30 (DH takes him down and does breakfast so I can catch up on some sleep)
Breakfast: 7.00 - 7.30
Nap: 8.30-9.30 (sometimes an hour, sometimes less)
BF: 9.30-10.00
Lunch: 11.30-12.00
Nap: 12.30-2 (usually at least an hour, occasionally up to 90 mins)
BF: 1.30-2.00
Nap: 3.30-4.30 for 30 mins. I make sure he’s awake by 4.45 at the VERY latest. He often fights this nap but does need it, otherwise it can be a very long stretch til bed time.
BF: 4.00- 4.45
Dinner: 5-6pm depending on nap wake up and how hungry he is!
BF: 6.45-7pm
Bed: 7.00-7.30
Overnight: 3 BF

His total nap time is between 2-3 hours a day, with awake times of 2.5-3.5 hours. Night sleep is 10-11 hours in 3ish hour chunks (a recent improvement on 90mins-2hours). He has no self settling skills and is either fed or is rocked/held to sleep at night and is still in our room. He will only nap in his bouncy chair or (if he is tired enough to lose interest in the world!) in his pram. On the plus side he doesn’t need pitch dark to go to sleep and wakes at the same time as he always did despite the mornings being lighter! He has just started getting really tired around 11.30-12, which messes up lunch time, I generally try to power through but wonder if this is a sign that he’d better off with 2 naps a day.

When I’m at work I intend to feed him on wake up, bed time and overnight (though I’d love to get this down to 1-2 times!) but obviously can do more on the days I’m off. So it seems like a good time to start permanently replacing a feed at a time with a snack but I’m not sure which one to drop first? Also how would you adapt the timings of his other feeds accordingly? In terms of naps and night time sleep, does his seem ok and normal?

I guess, the tldr version is:
What did your schedule look like at 9 months? Where do I need to adapt mine? Any advice on which feed might be better to drop? Do I need to try and move towards two naps a day? Am I doing ok?!

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moreismore · 24/06/2019 13:48

I am still ver baby led at 10 months. DD started nursery at 9 months. Eats loads there, refuses expressed milk. Always fed to sleep at home but within a week was settling for naps with just back rubs (nursery witchcraft). Prepare for naps on car journeys to and from nursery. Also expect Them to demand bf on pickup! I sit at chair in nursery and do this before I leave. There are lots of teeth and sleep regressions to come, not to mention all the new bugs! Sounds like you’ve done a great job so far so I’d continue to go with the flow and it will sort itself out.

birdybirdbird · 24/06/2019 14:07

Thanks @moreismore. I like hearing of this nursery witch craft! He’s with DH initially but will be going to nursery in September. I am pretty baby led but when I started noting it all down he seemed to have fallen into a pattern. Though I do wonder if I’m BF after a nap out of habit at this point rather than him being actually hungry?

OP posts:
moreismore · 24/06/2019 14:10

Yes I def offer all the time out of habit. DD was eating at all 3 mealtimes (with older DS) until a couple of weeks ago when teething hit and since then she’s refusing food at home in favour of bf. So it may just keep changing for a bit. (Except at nursery where they eat and sleep on command Grin)

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Lazypuppy · 24/06/2019 17:14

At 9 months my dd was eating 3 meals and 2 snacks a day and was down to 3 bottles, weekday routine below:

7am wake up
7:30 drop at nursery, bottle of milk
10:30-11:30 nap
11:30 lunch
1:30 snack
3-4 nap
4:30 snack and bottle of milk
6:30 dinner
7:30 bottle of milk

Sleep 12hrs through the night

Bethacus · 24/06/2019 21:29

Are you offering all breastfeeds or waiting for cues? My DD is just about 10 months and over the course of the past month has started ‘asking’ for feeds rather than crying. She’ll either pull at my top or, usually when we’re in public, basically start motor boating me!

I still offer around nap times as she’s generally fed to sleep at home. I’ve found this has led to a bit of variation in how many feeds she has a day as some days she’ll eat more food and want less boob or be distracted by going to groups. Some days she’s still an absolute boob monster but I’d say the overall trend was moving towards fewer feeds.

She still wakes for feeds around 3/4 times a night but I’m hoping that’s going to magically fix itself before I go back to work!

Rosebud1302 · 24/06/2019 22:22

I know exactly what you mean about offering bf out of habit. I do the same thing after naps. I think until 1 we shouldn't be dropping feeds intentionally anyway unless bang refuses it (someone correct me if I'm wrong) so I wouldn't worry about the amount of bf.

Rosebud1302 · 24/06/2019 22:23

baby refuses it not bang 🙄

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