How to help 4yo dd who is terrified of dogs

[Pillowcase99]

Hi all

My 4yo dd has always been completely terrified of dogs. I'm not sure if it's a phobia, but if she can see one on a lead walking towards us she'll completely panic, climb up me and scream and cry if one comes near. It doesn't matter the size or breed. The only time I've been able to get her comfortable with a dog is when we befriended a very old labrador cross that was tied up outside a local shop and was happy to lie down calmly and be stroked. I think her fear comes from the jumpiness of some younger dogs and not being able to predict them. I think it's getting worse, too.

I had a dog growing up and like dogs generally, i think it's a lovely relationship to have and really love the affection you can share with them. I'd love her to not feel that fear and maybe even love dogs like i do but i know the latter may never happen.

We're about to move to a bigger house and i'm wondering whether a puppy that is ours, like a lab or another family friendly breed, might help her gain that relationship and learn not to fear all dogs? Or is that a terrible idea?

Ive tried to gently introduce her to friends dogs but that hasn't worked at all. I also calmly tell her that dogs on leads can't run off, and if she's with me she's safe. We're at a point that sometimes she will be brave enough to walk by a dog going the other direction if i'm in between, and she'll feel proud of herself doing that as i praise her and we talk about how there's no need to be scared. I am aware i also don't want to take it too far because some dogs aren't safe, but at the moment we're at no risk of her trying to befriend a dangerous dog on her own, given that she won't go near any of them!

I'd hate her to go through life with this fear, as i think it can affect people on a daily basis, and would love some ideas on how to help. Would walking someone else's dog regularly maybe help?

Thanks in advance

I’m interested in responses to this op as my 4.5 year old is similar but it’s a more recent thing due to a dog jumping up at her. She’s never been overly confident but after this recently happening she’s become more nervous and I’m trying to work through it with her.

Smaller little dogs aren’t too bad but any that want to jump/bound up to us because ‘they’re just being friendly’ is making it even worse.

My son was similar and he didn’t get any better until we got a puppy of our own when he was 5. We got a Labrador pup and the first few days he was scared of the pup and jumped every time it moved but by day 4/5 he was fine to pet it and by day 10 was a certified dog addict. He now is not afraid of dogs and was the main influence on us getting a second one.

This sounds a bit odd, but if you turn your back on a dog, it’s no, in dog language.
I can’t remember where I read this but it does work.

I have been walking my dog for years and it’s never failed.

We have always had dogs and my children are very good at reading dog language. Try to teach them to recognise what the dog is doing maybe. You do need to spend time with dogs I think.

Whatalump interesting how soon your ds responded, that's encouraging! We have another baby on the way so will get through the first year then might pull the trigger and get a puppy then.

Thanks all!

The middle child was like this, if she even saw a dog she would scream, try and climb up on us, it was really bad. But then we were looking at getting a family dog and we took her meet some puppies, they were a small breed, so very small as puppies. She wasnt scared of something so small and now she's absolutely fine, with all dogs.