Worried about DD friends behaviour

[CafeAuLait7]

DD and friend are both in year 5, for a few months now I've been concerned about her friends behaviour after reading some messages she sent my DD on roblox... things like asking my dd to roleplay with her and pretend to be lesbians, when my DD told her friend she didn't really want to and felt uncomfortable she then told my DD that she knew she didnt really like her and shes sad and felt like an idiot and maybe they shouldn't play together anymore basically guilting my DD into roleplaying.

These past couple of days DD is starting to see her for what she really is. a bully and controlling. she threatened my DD with their friendship if she didn't apologize for playing with another school friend during break while friend was at a doctors appointment! DD said no i should be allowed to have other friends you can't tell me who i can or cant talk to her friend told her then that nobody likes her anyway and dont come crying back to her if she cant find another friend to play with and was shoved this afternoon after school while getting ready to go home. no teacher or other student was around to see but DD came out very upset as shes never been touched in anger before. she said shes afraid her ex friend will really hurt her.

i went through dd school bag and found a picture drawn by her ex friend a few weeks ago and in it is them together holding hands with a love heart around them and on the bottom of the page it says "I will heart you forever bff NO ONE will take you away from me".

maybe im reading too much into this picture but it really scared me.
i logged into my dd roblox account today and have read messages sent from this ex friend and was shocked to see song lyrics she dedicated to dd saying things like "i will kill any competition who tries to take you from me" and other similar songs like this.

im at a complete loss at what to do about this... do i speak to a teacher? my daughter asked me to speak to someone because she really is afraid she will try and hurt her again.

Sorry not much advice OP but I think your best bet would be to speak to a teacher and get your daughter to stay away from the girl if possible, and also keep the messages from her, sorry that your joth going through this.

The friend is very young to be talking like that. She probably doesn't know what she is talking about & when she is older, will be embarrassed on looking back. Still, it makes your daughter uncomfortable and I'd encourage her to limit friendship. Do speak to the teacher who may be able to explain to the girl how inappropriate and intrusive her words and behaviour are.

Get your daughter off Roblox. It doesn't matter how tight you've set up parental controls there's a lot of reports of 3rd party apps being used and unknowns being in touch with children. My eldest was furious when I blocked it, but I still maintain it's a pretty toxic environment that allows the wrong kind of role play/communication.

As for the 'friend' I'd definitely ask for a meeting with the teacher and explain your concerns. Less from a getting the girl into trouble perspective but more from an awareness point of view and ask that your daughter can be taken seriously when reporting worrying behaviour. Gain assurances that it will be handled appropriately (and how).

Yes our children need to learn how to deal with all sorts of dynamics in friendships but I firmly believe that school should be a safe environment for learning and not somewhere a child is on guard for bullying/manipulative behaviour.