Terrified of weaning

[Panda368]

Baby is almost 7 months old and I think I’m having a problem with weaning. I started giving him bits at 6 months but every time I do I’m terrified he’s going to choke or have an allergic reaction. I feel physically sick every time I give him something new or whenever he gags.

He’s breast fed with CMPA and reflux and doesn’t seem overly interested in food quite yet but I know I should be getting on with it but everything I do I feel like I’m doing it wrong or he’s going to choke and die!

Have you been on a baby first aid to give you more confidence? Also try watching videos of choking v gagging.

Are you over anxious about other things or just weaning?

Mostly anxious about weaning and food allergies, I’m usually a very relaxed person.
Will try watching a few videos to desensitise myself. Haven’t done a specific baby first aid course but was a lifeguard in a previous life and know how to do infant CPR, maybe it would be a good idea as a refresher

Have Piriton in the house just in case of an allergic reaction. Introduce new things one at a time and a first aid course sounds like a good idea. Think of all the millions of babies that are weaned and are fine

The longer you leave it, the more prone to allergies he'll be. Just don't give him chunky stuff. Avoid apple, raw carrot, grapes etc. Blitz his food into mush. Or just use baby food.

Wrt food allergies,let me tell you what happened with my ds and it might reassure you. He is allergic to nuts but we only found out when he was 3,he'd eaten nuts before and was fine.

I was eating nuts and he touched the nuts I was holding and then came out in hives and his eyes swelled up and it was very clear he needed to be seen. I rang NHS Direct as it was at the time,they said give Piriton and take him to A and E immediately. We lived very close to a hospital so we drove and we were seen immediately and they pumped him full of stuff to bring down the hives which were scary looking by then. Now he's an adult and carries an epi pen.

I have looked after children and weaned them and one boy had a reaction to fish but it wasn't scary,he just came up in red blotches. Piriton brought it down. Again,this was after having fish a few times. Iirc you don't have a reaction the first time. He also carries an epi pen now he's older.

Allergies happen ,you need to be more confident in how you will deal with it IF it happens.

I was exactly the same and baby was the same too, bf with CMPA. I used to cry when giving her food. I would want my partner to be home before giving her any as I was so worried something bad would happen. I was convinced I needed to do BLW but gave up on it as it was just too much for my anxiety to deal with.

We took food slow and steady, we used the Cow and Gate porridge that can be mixed with breast milk and then lots of home blended meals with a mix of DF Ella's Kitchen. If you sign up to Cow and Gate online they will send you a great weaning book. I can't offer much advice other than I can relate and to this day we haven't had an incident of choking (luckily). Dairy free weaning brings it's own challenges so you have a lot on your plate (excuse the pun ).

A first aid class would be a great thing to get involved with if you haven't done so already.

First aid class is a good idea. We did BLW as he refused a spoon and gagged a bit o start with but soon got the hang of it, it's all part of the learning process, it's just scary for us! I remember mine looking unbelievably pleased with himself as he chomped on a stick of cucumber!

Hi OP. Regarding allergies I believe it’s very rare for babies to have a life threatening reaction to a food on the 1st exposure. It seems that severe allergy is something that develops, often after several exposures to the allergen. Children are actually less likely to become allergic if they are exposed to allergens earlier in life, so without sounding harsh you really have to just put your fears to one side and introduce them. Try foods one at a time at home and if there is the faintest sign of any swelling if the face phone 999. I know it’s hard, I have an older child with nut allergy and it’s been worrying weaning dc2. I was also worried about choking so I did a baby 1st aid and I felt more confident.

The Annabelle Karmel book tells you exactly what to give and when,you might feel less anxious working from a timetable/ book. I've used it with a few children.

I would start off with much and increase the lumps as you become more confident and then pass him things from your plate as he becomes interested.

Are you under the allergy team at the hospital?

It's really common for parents (and children) to have problems with anxiety if they their child has allergies. Lots of allergy services have specialist therapy you can be referred to. Might be worth asking.

More practically, it he's BFed then presumably your used to excluding dairy from your diet, so focus on that. Just give him foods you know are fine. It's normal for babies to gag in the beginning but that goes pretty quickly. Stick to veg, pasta, rice, chicken etc and purée if it solves the choking worry.

Has he had any skin prick tests?

www.worldofbooks.com/en-gb/books/annabel-karmel/annabel-karmel-s-new-complete-baby-toddler-meal-planner-4th-edition/GOR001228627?keyword=&gclid=Cj0KCQjwitPnBRCQARIsAA5n84m5O64hMLJAPxBmnYYYthABsaxh8A0SLE-39QMIOd8WgUvaat5i95oaAmCJEALw_wcB

Re the choking thing: I apply the tongue squish test (if I can swish it on the roof of my mouth with my tongue, it's safe to give). Some BLWers give babies hard lumps of apple and raw carrot and chewy sticks of steak--each to their own but I would not feel comfortable with that. You can always puree foods that are otherwise hard for babies to eat. It's important you feel comfortable with the weaning process.

The tongue squish test is a great idea!

OP I was exactly the same - very calm generally but weaning my first was awful. I was so scared of him choking. And I'd convinced myself that I had to do baby led weaning

I came to the conclusion that BLW was NOT for every baby/mum and we did traditional weaning with the addition of those kiddlylicious melty cracker things to build up my confidence. A baby first aid course really helped too, and as PP said I followed the Annabel Karmel book.

We got there. It wasn't nearly as bad second time, so I do wonder if it was a bit of a new mum anxiety thing for me.

If there's any guilt about not doing BLW, back in the day it was just called 'weaning the baby' and some people gave bigger prices of food than others 😉

Every single person you know. Every adult, every old person, every child, has been successfully weaned and not died of an allergic reaction.

Introduce foods one by one, maybe start with baby puffs (theyre like the world's most boring wotsits). Can't choke on a puff. Then move on to something a bit less...artificial. It gets easier I promise.

Oh, and top tip, if you stick your finger in the pointy end of a banana it splits in to three smaller baby sized bits.

I have 2 enthusiastically baby led weaned babies (ie ripped food out of my hands and refused spoon feeding). Remember that the bag reflex is much further forward in the mouth in babies. If they start chunkier foods earlier.on they learn to deal with them before they gag right at the back of the mouth and could therefore choke. I don't think I've explained that well. Basically if a 6 month old gags the food is actually quite way forward

Surely mush teaches them to push food immediately to the back of the mouth and swallow without chewing?

Why? My baby coped fine with both.

Does this mean that once you have given your child a finger food, you are no longer "allowed" to give them yogurt or mashed potato?

Make the food yourself that way you can control the consistency

Just do plain veggies to start with , baby’s have a very high gag reflex at this age which helps

Follow your babies lead my little guy grabbed his spoon and shoved it in his mouth first time but some are not that fussed

Baby porridge is super smooth, we did butternut squash as a first food with some milk added and purées

I have had a few heart steak s offering wafers and biscottis to help him stay feed and learn chewing but he has been fine chocked once but got it up fine.

And I didn’t give food without a second adult there either x

I had a worse experience with milk when he wet limp after gagging on some had to hold him midair and whack his back furiously ( first and last dream feed he had) has he was going blue .

Oh god purée it if that’s what you want I do! He loves it like that so I am doing old school just re read and realise people are talking baby lead weaning

He does it wagers , and baby crisps well but I purée or mash his food still

I BLW for many reasons. Have a look at it - baby led weaning.

A babys gag reflex is actually closer to the front of their mouth/tip of their tongue than ours, so they actually gag before we do.

Read up on it and see how you feel. I cannot recommend it enough. It made weaning my dd an enjoyable bonding experience for the whole family.