Is it only me that doesn't like this?

[supersuper]

Why do random strangers in supermarkets, walking down the street, walking around shops feel it necessary to stop and physically touch my 10 month old sons face and hair, whilst getting in his face telling him how lovely he is!

I know I'm a little bit biased but I totally agree, he is a lovely looking baby that loves to smile, but that doesn't mean it's acceptable for people he and myself do not know to touch him.

I would never dream of touching another person or their child if I had never met them before.
I really want to tell them to kindly not touch him but I know I will be made out to be the one with the problem or that I'm stroppy.

Does anyone else feel like this or am I just being over dramatic?

New mothers seem to be so possessive over their babies. These people are charmed by your DS and are just being nice. If they were being horrible I could understand it you being upset, but they're not. Chill, super

Nope. Don’t touch me strange person. Definitely do not touch my offspring. Agree with you OP, they could be harmless but my mother also looked harmless. As did my sexual abusers.

It's mainly people who have had children that do this (IME). I guess they're just remembering back to the days when their baby was that tiny and precious. They're doing it out of kindness not hostility.

You could say something like "mind his face, he has really sensitive skin" if you don't want them physically touching him.

I’ve been known to physically push people’s hands away from my child. You wouldn’t touch an adult without consent so why do you think it’s ok to touch a child? People might be lovely but that doesn’t mean they’re not carrying diseases. And you can’t tell just by looking who is lovely and nice versus who is a paedophile or sicko. In fact even if I know you, I’d still prefer you to keep your hands to yourself.

Singlenotsingle thanks for telling me to chill, I'll take that on board.
Just wondering though, as an adult, how would you react to a stranger randomly approaching you and start touching your face and hair? Would you see that as them just being nice?
Just because children aren't grown enough to say they don't like it doesn't mean strangers can do that.
As parents isn't our job to speak up for our children in situations that aren't appropriate?

I'm with you, it's not appropriate to touch a strangers face, especially a baby. People have such minimal self awareness.

Definitely agree! I do not know why people find it so acceptable to touch and get in the face of babies and children. I realise the majority of people mean no harm but I don't think it's right.

I often tell them to get away and stop touching my child. I have no shame about it. It isn't really appropriate. I had a man come up the other day and want to take a photo of my 6 year old because he 'liked her cute dress'. My dh promptly told him to f*ck off.

I wouldn't want a random stranger touching me, so why should I allow someone to do it to my son? I agree with you OP.

Completely agree OP, it drives me mad.

The worst was when me and my baby son were in a restaurant toilet and a woman came out of one of the cubicles and touched his face before she’d even washed her hands. Yuck! I hate it when strangers touch him - to me, it’s a really weird thing to do - but I just smile, unless he obviously doesn’t like it (but he actually loves the attention) or they’re a weirdo.

It’s the ones who look visibly ill that do it. Cheers for the germs 👍

New mothers seem to be so possessive over their babies. These people are charmed by your DS and are just being nice. If they were being horrible I could understand it you being upset, but they're not. Chill, super
Oh please
I guess someone is a toucher then.

Nope, I don't touch strange adults or strange babies, it is weird and inappropriate. I find more and more people are aware of this but in my home country older generations definitely do the touching, I let those ones go but the rest I move child away. Luckily I carry my babies in a sling.

It's not just babies.
I work in retail and there are an amount of people who will physically touch me to get my attention and I hate it and I make it very obvious.
You don't know what someone has lived through and having a complete stranger touch you unexpectedly is a huge invasion of my personal space.
People grab my waist, my arm or wrist.
I don't agree with touching strangers at all. Forget about germs it's basic respect to that person's body.

People at my work feel entitled to put their hands on me and I don’t accept it. People need to keep their hands to themselves, stop fucking touching people of any age unless you’re explicitly invited to. It’s not difficult.

I posted about this a while back. We literally got stalked around a shop by a man with dirty plasters on his hands who had his grubby mitts on lo’s face while I was reaching for something off a shelf.

Fine talk to us (even if I’m in a rush or trying to get dc to sleep) but why touch!!

Must admit now my LOs are older and play with soil etc I’m not as fussed but still not keen

I’m with you op. 100% and it’s not precious!

I also got told i was very British which made me laugh because that’s just factually incorrect

I’m with you OP. I might smile and say hello to a baby sat near me on a train or something but touching the child? No way, that’s a bit much. Max max max I might high five a kid if he is being playful but I wouldn’t touch them just bc they are cute. That’s odd.

Good old Mumsnet!

Agreed and you have every right to be ‘possessive’ over a baby, they’re defenceless and need you to protect them!

I hate it too and appreciate people who admire from a distance.

No I agree it's totally inappropriate I hate it when strangers feel the need to touch my DS or DD I can't stand it and I think that's why I usually give them a quick thanks and smile but block any risks of them reaching out to touch my children.
As horrible as it sounds I've maybe smiled at another person and their baby but I would never in a million years feel the urge or need to physical touch the baby

Maybe I lack some sort of normal maternal instinct but I also have a 10 month old and I don't see the big deal? We're churchgoers and people (mostly old people) literally queue up to 'peace' DS in the 'peace be with you' bit because it means they get to hold his little hand or stroke his little cheek - I just stand there thinking 'well OF COURSE they all want to cuddle him, he's fricking adorable'. Despite my usual slight aversion to public small talk, I also greatly enjoy people pointing out the obvious truth telling me he's lovely in shops, etc

On reflection, I may be the other kind of PFB mother

“Maybe I lack some sort of normal maternal instinct but I also have a 10 month old and I don't see the big deal?”

No. Your reaction is the sensible “normal” one. Babies thrive on human contact- they need it to grow and develop. All this keeping them in bubbles is new and psychologically damaging.

To be clear- obviously you don’t want people touching your premature newborn. But a hale and hearty 10 month old? Seriously?

I'm with you on this, I hate it!