Does it get easier?

[Lizbiz89]

I have a 5 week old ds and a 2 yr old dd. I am at the end of my exhaustion level. I thought I was getting somewhere with sleep then my dd caught a cold at nursery and passed it onto my ds. For about 5 days now I've survived on 3 hrs of broken sleep a night. To add to the misery I have to look after my dd who is very active in the day. I'm so sleep deprived and run down I feel like zombie. Please say it gets better? I feel so low at the moment 😩.

It really does get easier! Sleep deprivation is terrible and makes everything a thousand times worse.

Is there any way you can get some sleep during the day? Any relatives who will look after your toddler for a couple of hours?

Do you have a garden to sit in while dd runs around?

It’s sooooo hard and relentless. I’ve just got home from visiting DD & DSIL with 3.5 and 9 month DGDs. It’s easier since Easter because the oldest is now doing 3 days at nursery so DD can at least lie down for a bit if the little one naps. But sleep deprivation is a nightmare and I felt guilty going home and leaving them to it.

Do you have anyone who could take your baby for a stroll in the pram for an hour so you could have a bit of a rest? 5 weeks is so tiny and sleep is usually very hit and miss but yes it should get better. Anything like a cold though and the whole sleep thing goes out the sodding window full stop. Take any and every short cut you can right now. Lower your standards and do only what’s absolutely necessary.

Sorry I forgot the toddler I all this. Yes absolutely if anyone can take your toddler out for a while that really is helpful.

I've got a 17 month old and a 8 week old and my gosh it's hard! I'm trying my best to fit my newborns routine around my toddlers and for the past couple of days, they've napped at the same time! Even though it was only for 20 minutes, it was the best 20 minutes of my day! lol!

Thanks for the replies. My mum has taken my dd out for the day which has given me a bit of break. So thankful she's about. Just really hope my ds starts feeling better soon and I can get a bit more sleep. Honestly feel like I'm in SAS training at the moment lol! Just living in hope it's going to get better soon. Nice to hear that things do improve eventually.

You must be shattered. Do you have a partner who will be around at the weekend?
Am pregnant and in my first trimester I would take my 2 year old to nap with me, well I would snooze while she watched Ceebies on the iPad. Can you do this a bit?

@allergyhelpnewbaby I managed to get a nap today when she was napping but it doesn't always work out that way. Depends on whether my ds is awake or not as he's not in a routine yet. Also my dd will not sit still for very long so getting her to watch tv for a solid half an hour is a rarity. Feeling a tad bit better after the nap though. Keeping my fingers and toes crossed for a solid 4 hours sleep tonight! I can't believe I ever used to complain when I got less than 8 ha ha!

That’s good. Im glad she naps even if it means you have watch TV awhile feeding the baby.

I’m still pregnant but my DD has been poorly and had to be held all night and needed lots of milk during the night - I was a wreck and I’m dreading the new born stage with a 3 year old. After 3 nights of her only waking up a couple of times I felt like a new women compared previous days. 4 years ago and pre child when I would have been exhausted if I had three nights in a row of being woken up several times rather than thinking I had a good deal.

I have a 2yr 2wk gap between mine and no family help. It is so so tough in the beginning. It got easier as the months went on and they each met various milestones, but the first year I followed the mantra of 'all fed, none dead'. We watched a lot of CBeebies, and visited a lot of softplays where I could sit with DD2 and watch whilst DD1 exhausted herself (and hopefully napped after!). We have local zoo membership so I was up there sometimes 3 times a week. I'd make DD1 walk around until near collapse (her not me!), then find a cafe and stick her in the buggy for a nap. On the good days DD2 would have a feed then nap in the buggy too, leaving me to eat cake in peace and rest. We continued to send DD1 to her childminder 1 day a week, and a few months after DD2 was born she was able to start preschool too. That was a god-send! For food I spent a fortune on ready prepped everything: bags of veg to steam in the microwave, naice ready meals or fresh meal kits, pre-made salad. DD1 had a couple of those Little Dish ready meals each week. I figured we hadn't had to spend out on baby tat, so used the 'new baby' fund on stuff to make life easier. We hired a cleaner too.

You are still really early on and getting the hang of juggling two on top of no sleep. It's normal to struggle with that! Mine will be 3 and 5yo next month and it is so much easier (and has been for a long time!). We have our issues of course, but they reliably play with each other a lot now which has freed up some of my time. They sleep better (although this is still a work in progress!) which is a game-changer. Your older child is on the brink of being able to do a bit more for herself (dressing/putting shoes on/better at fetching things/potty training etc) which will make a difference.
It will get better, just do whatever you have to now to get through this patch!

@AwkwardAsAllGetout good luck with your new baby. I'm sure we'll find our norm eventually. Actually makes me look forward to being old, at least we get our sleep back 😂.

@skankingpiglet thank you for all the advice. My dd has just started nursery which is an absolute godsend as well. Really looking forward to when my ds is old enough to play with dd. In the mean time I'm going to make sure dd keeps as busy as possible like you said.