One year old won't eat

[Bojangles33]

DS is one is two weeks and he hardly eats anything. Started when he was ill with a sore throat about 2 months ago. Previously a good eater with a mix of blended spoon fed food and finger foods. When he was ill obviously it hurt to eat and as soon as he got put in the high chair he would cry. Since then things have just got worse and he SCREAMS if I try to feed him anything from a spoon and will only tolerate being in the bumbo infront of the tv (I know I know, terrible parenting but I'm desperate here) for a short time to eat some finger foods but even then he throws himself around trying to get out and mostly just chucks the food everywhere. I don't know what to do, he's driving me mad. I dread every meal time because it's just such a battle. Currently I will try him with different things to see if I can get something in him but is this wrong? Should I offer one thing and if he rejects it then that's it? Is he too young to be being picky because the screaming definitely feels defiant.

He has 8oz of milk at 5/6am, 5oz at 2pm and 8oz at 6.30pm. He has woken a few times in the night recently at around midnight and has had another bottle because, I assume, he's hungry from not bloody eating all day!

DS was like this due to physical problems that made eating very painful for him. I used to cut food up into tiny squares and then post it into his mouth all day long when he was playing, so he barely noticed it was there. Then when it was time to have lunch or dinner, I'd put him in his high chair with a treat. That way he associated sitting up with somehting enjoyable (which i didn't care if he ate or not)

Most important things are to get some food into them somehow (any how - in front of TV is absolutely fine and to make sure mealtimes don't become a stressful situation for you both. Take the heat off them.

At one they should be on 12 oza day. Perhaps cut down on milk so he’s hungry for his food.

Worked with our lil one. Offer him just the food he really really likes to get him back on to food and they introduce other stuff again?

My one year old went through a phase like that for a few days and then a tooth popped up. Could it be teething?
She has actually gotten very fussy with food over the past few months which I didn’t think was possible at such a young age!
Don’t worry about the tv! We also do the same and have books to distract as well. Never had this issue with my eldest so it’s all new to me!
I did blw which they say is great but it seems to have back fired!

My 1yo won’t eat anything he can’t feed himself. He won’t take food from a spoon. Giving him a spoon to hold is helpful because it makes him feel like he’s independent. He eats everything with his fingers, including soup. He likes chopped up penne pasta because I pop it on the end of his finger like a ring and he giggles and waves it then eats it. Same with raspberries and any other soft food I can stick on his finger.

That seems like a lot of milk. Can you replace some of the milk with something else and give him yoghurt, cheese etc to keep up his dairy intake?

We've had a fussy few weeks due to a nasty cold and teething which was stressful enough. Could you do a snack tray (so little bowls or muffin cases) with different snack type food that might entice him? My DS gets overwhelmed if he has too much in front of him so I only put a bit of his meal out at a time. I also give him all the bits of his meal at once so he can choose what order to eat in - gives him some control and normally guarantees he eats well even if watching him eat fruit followed by a curry makes me feel queasy! I'd ditch the spoon and let him get stuck in with his hands too.

I will try cutting the milk down and see if that helps. He loves that afternoon bottle though :(

His sleep was terrible last night and I ended up feeding him again at 3am. He wouldn't take his bottle this morning though so I feel like he should be able to sleep through and isn't really needing that milk. That's probably a different post for a different board! I just feel like a failure.

Hi OP

I know it's stressful when they won't eat, but I think you need to take the pressure off (for both of you).

I would stop trying to strap him down to eat. Put the Bumbo and the highchair away and get a booster cushion for a normal chair, or invest in a child's chair that can push up to the dining table without straps.

He doesn't need any pureed food. Just sit down with him and give him whatever you're having. If he doesn't want to eat, let him get down or look at a book at the table. Try not to comment on what he eats, or doesn't eat. Don't feed him. Give him a spoon and a fork and let him get on with it.

In addition to meals, provide nutritious snacks. Just put them down where he can reach them and let him snack whilst he plays. Bits of fruit, toast, cheese, crackers, etc.

Could you make each of his milk feeds smaller rather than stopping them?

Personally I’ve never agreed with purée and I think one is definitely too old for it. I wouldn’t want to eat my dinner blended so have never expected DD to. Just give him normal food. If you put foods like yoghurt on a spoon he can feed himself if he would like to try. Does he eat the same thing as you at meal times and do you eat at the table together? What kind of foods are you offering?

DD has been teething quite badly recently so I’ve done her roasted veg (parsnips, peppers etc.). Lunch is usually a sandwich with strips of cucumber (great for teething) plus whatever fruit is in the fridge. If she doesn’t want to eat it she will just leave it on her tray (she throw it across the room sometimes but I try to not make a big deal about it!). She sits in her high chair with us at mealtimes which means we get to eat too, much less stressful all round.

@BlackInk he has a Tripp Trapp rather than high chair so no straps there but does have the toddler insert bits to stop him falling off it! I'm don't think he'd manage without that and is nowhere near helping himself with a spoon and fork. If I put snacks out they'd just be thrown around and mashed into the floor, so maybe I have more to worry about than simply him not eating or sleeping as it sounds like maybe he should be able to do a lot more than he can

@PerfectPeony2 he eats with me at breakfast and lunch time but he would have tea way before we would - he's in bed by the time we have tea. I tend to give him easy finger food like courgette and cheese muffins, pasta, veg fritters, falafels, sandwiches etc with veg sticks (cucumber is a favourite) and usually try to give him a bit of purée alongside it just to try and make sure he's had something as he does drop a LOT of the finger food. Again, maybe he's just not there yet in terms of development for the feeding himself as well as other babies his age do.

Get yourself some Doddl spoons and forks and leave him to it. He'll get the picture quicker than you think.
Don't worry about the dropped food, it can be picked up (pick it up at the end so it doesn't become a game). I know it's hard but you just have to let them eat without worrying about how much they're actually getting. He won't starve.

Sounds like you are doing everything right. I agree, don’t worry about the dropped food and just keep going with it, offering different stuff to try- even if it’s really messy like spag bol/ cottage pie. He will learn. I know most of DD’s food ended up on her high chair to start with and it’s taken a while but now she doesn’t drop much at all (just throws it for the dog instead!). I’d still ditch the purees and just trust that if he is really hungry he will eat. If DD doesn’t eat much I am guilty of giving her extra fruit and yogurt for dessert as I know she will eat it (smushed blueberrys, raspberry’s, strawberry’s, kiwi, banana, satsumas are all favourites). She never eats bland food so we always make sure we use lots of herbs/ spices (except for extra salt).

If you’re on Facebook there’s a group called baby led weaning for beginners and beyond which I’ve found really helpful.

Get a big plastic tablecloth or shower curtain, put it under the high chair, saves your floor/carpet.