Water babies- am so scared of the water!

[Rumi2019]

Hi

I need advice (am so embarrassed)! I signed up my 9 month old to Water babies swimming lessons. I cannot swim at all and tbh do have a slight phobia of the water. When booking on I asked if I could do it without swimming and was told the pool was small and shallow etc. Mind you I am only 5ft so that doesn't help. I think I was expecting a very shallow baby pool, but the pool was a small but normal shallow depth for me.

As soon as I got in (which was like after 15 years) I thought OH MY GOD this is deep it came upto my shoulders! Then I got given my baby who then screamed the entire lesson. He is going through severe people anxiety at the minute also. When we were stood splashing I was ok, but when they started to go in a circle that's when I felt extremely wobbly and thought I was going to fall with my baby

What should I do? Am dreading the second class. Think I'm gonna have to just stand in the corner of the pool and do the moves! So embarrassing :-(

Doesn't sound like anyone is enjoying it much. Do you have to do it? (I know WB is expensive and you've paid now, but apart from that?). I did it with a group of mums who had perfectly normal attitudes towards water and we all found it hard going at times!

I guess the only things are (a) you'll need to address this for yourself at some stage cos you're looking at years of taking small DC into the water and (b) DC will need to learn how to swim at some stage, but that absolutely doesn't have to mean Water Babies.

I’d stop. Not sure why you signed up if you are that scared of the water! Just wait a few years and sign up for regular swim classes your child can do without you being in the pool.

I had no idea the water was going to be like a normal adult pool "shallow end". Was expecting it to be baby pool depth and come to my waist or something
Plus WB said it was a small pool and other moms have been fine etc. I guess I just really wanted to do something with baby

I've paid for the full chapter now I don't know what to do. Think perhaps I should call WB and discuss how to tackle this.

Generally do the lessons get more advanced and require some form of swimming with baby?

Plus I had no idea I was that scared till I got in and remembered. It took me to a "anxious feeling" 15 years ago

When I went honeymoon & holidays in 2013/14/15 I've bounced about happily in quite shallow end pools.

This is a tough one. I learned to swim at 6 months as did my children. Learning to swim is such an important life skill. I think I would try again. However, babies are emotional sponges, so your child may very well be picking up on your fears. Perhaps you should take swimming lessons.

DS started water babies at 9 months. It was hard going as I'm a 5ft non swimmer and tbh even the most laid back babies don't get along with swimming at times. Some weeks are good, some are just quite frankly utterly crap.

But.

It's worth persevering. It's about building up YOUR confidence in the water just as much as your baby's. At 9 months your baby will feel fragile and it does feel like you are somehow a bad parent some weeks if they are having an off week for whatever reason.

To get the benefit of the lessons you do have to commit to it, and I think you get to see the real benefit of it when your baby is toddling and starting to actively take part in the lessons themselves once they are mobile. Everything up to that point is just about confidence - and again I stress that's YOUR confidence as much as your baby's in water. And it's the confidence your baby has in trusting you too.

DS recently finished the whole course as a four year old. He's utterly fearless in the water now and is on the verge of being able to swim himself. I've really enjoyed the last 2 years. Prior to that it was hit and miss, week on week. I'm gutted it's over. I hope he never has the same fear of water that I had (and still have if I'm out of my depth).

I'm so much more confident in water myself now. I still can't swim but I'm comfortable in the pool with DS and I don't feel anxious about him being in the pool either. He literally gets chucked in constantly and loves it. If I think back to those first lessons and how hard the mere thought of my baby being underwater was, its really strange.

FWIW talk to your teacher about your fears. They will take it slower for you and help you go at your pace to build confidence. Having a good relationship with the teacher was invaluable to me. That does take a little while for the teacher to get to know you. If you think you want to stand in the corner and do the moves for a couple of weeks say so. You don't have to do everything in a lesson and you don't have to 'keep up with everyone else'. You have no idea if everyone else in the class are confident swimmers - in fact I suspect the reason many do the classes is precisely because they aren't. And yes, your baby will scream during lessons, some more than others, because they are a baby. Other times they will be in the right mood and it's worth the shitty week.

I met a good bunch of people during my lessons. They were really supportive. I'm going to miss them a lot too. I hope we do keep in touch.

I know a lot of people do give it up after one or two lessons which I do think is a real shame. I think there is something of an expectation that it's going to be a wonderful magical experience or something and actually it can be hard work and you only get the benefit from persevering with it. It might not ultimately be for you, but do give it a good crack before throwing in the towel first.

DS started water babies at 9 months. It was hard going as I'm a 5ft non swimmer and tbh even the most laid back babies don't get along with swimming at times. Some weeks are good, some are just quite frankly utterly crap.

But.

It's worth persevering. It's about building up YOUR confidence in the water just as much as your baby's. At 9 months your baby will feel fragile and it does feel like you are somehow a bad parent some weeks if they are having an off week for whatever reason.

To get the benefit of the lessons you do have to commit to it, and I think you get to see the real benefit of it when your baby is toddling and starting to actively take part in the lessons themselves once they are mobile. Everything up to that point is just about confidence - and again I stress that's YOUR confidence as much as your baby's in water. And it's the confidence your baby has in trusting you too.

DS recently finished the whole course as a four year old. He's utterly fearless in the water now and is on the verge of being able to swim himself. I've really enjoyed the last 2 years. Prior to that it was hit and miss, week on week. I'm gutted it's over. I hope he never has the same fear of water that I had (and still have if I'm out of my depth).

I'm so much more confident in water myself now. I still can't swim but I'm comfortable in the pool with DS and I don't feel anxious about him being in the pool either. He literally gets chucked in constantly and loves it. If I think back to those first lessons and how hard the mere thought of my baby being underwater was, its really strange.

FWIW talk to your teacher about your fears. They will take it slower for you and help you go at your pace to build confidence. Having a good relationship with the teacher was invaluable to me. That does take a little while for the teacher to get to know you. If you think you want to stand in the corner and do the moves for a couple of weeks say so. You don't have to do everything in a lesson and you don't have to 'keep up with everyone else'. You have no idea if everyone else in the class are confident swimmers - in fact I suspect the reason many do the classes is precisely because they aren't. And yes, your baby will scream during lessons, some more than others, because they are a baby. Other times they will be in the right mood and it's worth the shitty week.

I met a good bunch of people during my lessons. They were really supportive. I'm going to miss them a lot too. I hope we do keep in touch.

I know a lot of people do give it up after one or two lessons which I do think is a real shame. I think there is something of an expectation that it's going to be a wonderful magical experience or something and actually it can be hard work and you only get the benefit from persevering with it. It might not ultimately be for you, but do give it a good crack before throwing in the towel first.

DS started water babies at 9 months. It was hard going as I'm a 5ft non swimmer and tbh even the most laid back babies don't get along with swimming at times. Some weeks are good, some are just quite frankly utterly crap.

But.

It's worth persevering. It's about building up YOUR confidence in the water just as much as your baby's. At 9 months your baby will feel fragile and it does feel like you are somehow a bad parent some weeks if they are having an off week for whatever reason.

To get the benefit of the lessons you do have to commit to it, and I think you get to see the real benefit of it when your baby is toddling and starting to actively take part in the lessons themselves once they are mobile. Everything up to that point is just about confidence - and again I stress that's YOUR confidence as much as your baby's in water. And it's the confidence your baby has in trusting you too.

DS recently finished the whole course as a four year old. He's utterly fearless in the water now and is on the verge of being able to swim himself. I've really enjoyed the last 2 years. Prior to that it was hit and miss, week on week. I'm gutted it's over. I hope he never has the same fear of water that I had (and still have if I'm out of my depth).

I'm so much more confident in water myself now. I still can't swim but I'm comfortable in the pool with DS and I don't feel anxious about him being in the pool either. He literally gets chucked in constantly and loves it. If I think back to those first lessons and how hard the mere thought of my baby being underwater was, its really strange.

FWIW talk to your teacher about your fears. They will take it slower for you and help you go at your pace to build confidence. Having a good relationship with the teacher was invaluable to me. That does take a little while for the teacher to get to know you. If you think you want to stand in the corner and do the moves for a couple of weeks say so. You don't have to do everything in a lesson and you don't have to 'keep up with everyone else'. You have no idea if everyone else in the class are confident swimmers - in fact I suspect the reason many do the classes is precisely because they aren't. And yes, your baby will scream during lessons, some more than others, because they are a baby. Other times they will be in the right mood and it's worth the shitty week.

I met a good bunch of people during my lessons. They were really supportive. I'm going to miss them a lot too. I hope we do keep in touch.

I know a lot of people do give it up after one or two lessons which I do think is a real shame. I think there is something of an expectation that it's going to be a wonderful magical experience or something and actually it can be hard work and you only get the benefit from persevering with it. It might not ultimately be for you, but do give it a good crack before throwing in the towel first.

Not sure of the solution but following for ideas as similar.

In my experience of WB, the instructors are great at adapting the activities for both the adult and child to accommodate the different needs/limitations/moods of all the people in class. I would definitely speak to the office and your instructor about your fear, as they can't do anything to help if they don't know about it. If it were me I would try and tough out the first chapter, as it may help your own confidence as well as being a life skill for your child

Speak to WB because I bet there is a different session locally you could transfer to that has a shallower pool, the pool I take my son to is just over waist height for me and I'm short myself, I'm sure they could also adapt things for you so you don't have to move around the pool so much

I've just signed up to WB and in their Ts and Cs it states as a new swimmer you cancel the chapter up to the third lesson (think there is a £30 charge). So you could give the next lesson a chance and if you're still not happy you can get a refund.

Biggest rip off going!

I've done the entire Water Babies course and taken my DS to many different pools of varying depth. It's much easier to do all the aspects of the lesson in a deeper pool than a shallow pool as the lessons progress. You also don't have to keep bending down with them.

I disagree with a PP as to just take LO to lessons when they're old enough for you to not be in the pool. If you're not confident are you going to take them for a splash about safely before they're 5? Are you going to pass on any insecurities?

Stick with WB. It's a brilliant programme and gives you and LO so much confidence in the water. Just explain to your teacher how anxious you are.

Good luck.

I've done the entire Water Babies course and taken my DS to many different pools of varying depth. It's much easier to do all the aspects of the lesson in a deeper pool than a shallow pool as the lessons progress. You also don't have to keep bending down with them.

I disagree with a PP as to just take LO to lessons when they're old enough for you to not be in the pool. If you're not confident are you going to take them for a splash about safely before they're 5? Are you going to pass on any insecurities?

Stick with WB. It's a brilliant programme and gives you and LO so much confidence in the water. Just explain to your teacher how anxious you are.

Good luck.

Been there OP! For me it was the trigger to start swimming lessons myself. Started just under a year ago and I now go and swim lengths outside of lessons and started some diving this week :) genuinely never thought it would happen, so if I can do it you definitely can!

I don't think you should attend. The classes are supposed to be giving your baby confidence in the water, and they take their cues from you, so if you are very nervous it will likely make them also feel anxious and could be counter productive. Could you switch to a different day, perhaps a weekend, when your partner or a close relative could take them instead?

Ps, no need to be embarrassed, I agree that you should also look into adult swimming classes to increase your own confidence.

We didn't sign up for it because friends have mine have done it where they do the underwater bit and I'm terrified of putting my head under water despite being a confident and enthusiastic swimmer!

I'd see if you can cancel - we go out local leisure pool sometimes for a splash round. We'll put him in for lessons when he is about 3. It might be worth you getting some lessons too to help you - would be beneficial in the toddler/child years.

We did water babies when my dd was that age. It was crap. She screamed and hated it. I hated it. And I’m 5’9 and a perfectly good swimmer. And it’s eye wateringly expensive.

We stopped after about 6 months. We did almost no swimming for the next couple years. Started taking her to the pool on her own from about 3. She’s 6 now and swims as well as all her friends who have had 5 years of swimming lessons. You really don’t need it. Do you have a partner who swims who could take her when she’s older?

I did this specifically because I'm not confident in the water and didn't want to pass that on to my DC. They grew up super confident in water and I also got used to being splashed so it helped me too. My instructor did any bits that required me to go underwater though!

I would invest in some separate adult swimming lessons for yourself, could dp watch DS for half an hour or so at the weekend? You need to build your confidence and that's quite hard to do whilst holding a wriggling baby.
As the chapters progress you have to put your own head in the water along with your baby so they can see your face under the water. You/they go under water 2/3 times most sessions, you can choose not to do it but you're not really going to be getting much out of the (very expensive) sessions if not.
Imo 9 months is quite late to start waterbabies, we started at 5 weeks, as did most of the others in our chapter, and I think the chapter 1 activities are aimed at much younger babies so you may be better doing a local tots swim class with less dunking and more playing and general splashing about.

You will be putting your baby underwater from 2nd lesson, then 4th or 5th you put goggles on and watch under whilst teacher puts baby under.

Did you not google the pool.before signing up?

If you want actual baby pool, just do local leisure centre lessons

You will be putting your baby underwater from lesson, then 4th or 5th you put goggles on and watch under whilst teacher puts baby under.

If you don't feel up to doing this, you don't have to. You can go at a slower pace if that is what you are more comfortable with.

And no you don't need to go under if it's a problem too. There are ways to manage it and gradually build up confidence.

Talk to your teacher. Honestly no one will think less of you for it.

Thank you everyone; I'm going to give them a call today and see what they say and update here also (in case anyone is ever in my situation they get some insight)

Part of the reason I wanted to take LO was so they get happy and comfortable. I have a list of so many fears as an adult & don't want to be passing them on.

Unfortunately DH cannot swim wither & we don't have any family/friends close-by (& they can't swim either!).

I'm still on maternity leave right now but once I start getting some work I will look into swimming lessons again. When I was younger at 16 I did try (that's partly where the phobia started I think)- the teacher was utterly rubbish.