How awful is it going back to work after maternity leave?

[nonamesareavailable]

I am dreading leaving my baby. How awful is it? Will be leaving him for 3-4 days per week (TBC) and for at least 10 hours at a time (due to commute). LO will be in nursery. Please tell me it won't be as dreadful as I am imagining. LO is EBF. Doesn't eat solids or drink from a cup very reliably. Currently 8 months. Will be 12 months when I go back.

I hated going back. Cried a lot for a few months. On balance I'm glad I did go back and do enjoy it now. BF too and fine at nursery. I'd take as long off as you can manage, fully regret not saving enough to take a year off. I do like work now!

Those saying their DC were EBF bottle refusers, but were fine at nursery - how?!

I went back at 8.5 months, DD was home with DH for the first few weeks before starting nursery.

At first I fed her before I left, when I got in and at bedtime. But she wasn't eating her dinner between the two evening feeds and waking a lot at night. When I cut to morning and bedtime she upped her solids again and slept through.

Of course, a few weeks later she went on a nursing strike and never BF again (or took a bottle). So..

But seriously, it'll be fine. They up the solids and water. You can also try formula or expressed milk in a sippy cup if they won't take a bottle.

I loved it. What was different for me was that DH and I did shared parental leave so after my nine months, DH took over for three and that made it easier.

What I loved about going back to work was feeling I was good at something again. I am a total 'completer finisher' and love knowing I've done something well. After nine months of internally (and sometimes externally) shouting "I HAVENT GOT A FUCKING CLUE WHAT IM DOING" it was nice to finally get some praise!!

Wow thanks all. That makes me feel better. I am still absolutely terrified but good to know it will most likely be okay once it arrives!

I’m so glad I found this thread. I am just looking at nurseries for next year. My baby is only 3ms, but I have been sobbing! Thanks for your positive experiences.

It’ll be fine but it also depends on your work and how much you enjoy it etc. I love my job and went back when each DC was 4mths - both for financial and mental reasons - I don’t think I’d be doing them any favours staying at home much longer when I didn’t enjoy it.

It’s hard work - days feel longer when you’ve got to get up and get them and yourself ready and do drop off, work, then pick up etc. but my kids love daycare and I reckon they’re doing much better than if I’d just stayed at home with them out of guilt.

I've just come back to work full-time, out 7:30am and back between 4pm-5pm. DS is 5 months, ebf. I don't like being away from him but fortunately I'm so busy in the day I don't notice too much. I express twice at work.

He is reluctant to drink from a bottle or cup so drinks minimally through the day. He'll take a little puree but we haven't started him on solids yet. So when I get home he's usually been crying for a while and will have a big feed. Then he's up a lot in the night hungry (killer). It's stressful but I'm hoping he gets used to it and in a couple of weeks we can start weaning which should help.

I wouldn't have come back so early but was essentially forced (teacher with certain resignation dates). You're lucky if you can wait until at least 8 months as they should be more settled on solids. Counting down the weeks is the only way I'm getting through it!

Wow @ThisIsMeOrIsIt that's sounds so tough - well done Mamma - hang in there it'll get easier. My LO took to solids well by 8 months xx

And just reading back to my first post only one month ago just goes to show how much they change as now - one month on - he's eating SO much better! I reckon 8.5 months was a turning point for his eating xx

Ah I'm glad he's eating better OP. I
DS started eating better at 9 months when I swapped over with DH and worked whilst he had 3 months off. I still pumped for DS at work because formula upset his tummy, but because being breastfed wasn't constantly an option he got better at trying solids.

When I went back I was devastated, but on the advice of friends gave it a good 6 weeks before considering going part time etc. I'm really glad I did, it took a few weeks to settle in but i really enjoy my job, and 5 months after returning I got a promotion and a £10k pay rise. It was definitely the right thing to do, and DS has thrived at nursery.