To ask what you would do - maternity/shared parental leave

[PurpleFlower1983]

am mum to a gorgeous 3 month old DD. I am a teacher and my DH and I were planning to do shared parental leave from July. DH has a job with long hours where he is required to work away often. I would go back to work for 1 week and then have the 6 week holiday paid while DH and I are off together, starting back properly with a new class from September when DD will be 6.5 months old.

Professionally this works nicely for both me and my DH as his work season finishes in July and the new school year starts in September. Financially we would also be better off by about 2.5k over the leave and I would get some ‘free’ weeks.

Since having DD I have realised how quickly time flies and want to have longer off. I am now considering returning mid-October with my DH taking shared leave from September so we will still have a crossover of 6 weeks off together. DD will be 8 months when I go back and DH will be off with her until January, essentially DH loses 6 weeks and I gain it. Returning in October is not ideal at school but it would mean I don’t have to deal with getting my classroom prepared/planning etc. over the August holiday.

I would just like some opinions from on what you would do in my situation. I think I know what I am going to do but I keep second guessing things.

Meant to say ‘I am a mum...’

I think you have to do what's right for you all regardless of school plans. School will always be there though I know what you mean by originally planning to go back in Sept. I did this as it fitted in with my DCs birth dates of Sept so it was only just under a year and my mat leave would have neen over in a matter of weeks anyway. I went back just before the hols to get paid and to share some parental leave just like your plan. But your baby is younger and you have more time to take if you want it. There's not a right or wrong answer as long as you are happy.

Honestly I don’t think there is ever a right time to go back, the right time is when you go. Whether it is earlier or later, it’s still a wrench that only feels ‘right’ once you have done it. I had one short mat leave and one long one, I don’t think I felt any more ready the second time (but I was getting more sleep which helped staying awake all day). Only you can say what is right for you and how much you need the extra money. I wouldn’t worry too much about letting the school schedule dictate your choice though.

I would take the extra time. I think the months from 6-12 months can be particularly difficult, especially on sleep. I would be grateful to not rush back to work then and it wove good to have your dh more hands on during that time. I’ve gone back at 12 months with both of mine and that was just about right. It’s money well spent to not be exhausted and stressed at the start of the school year, even if it means you are less well off overall.

Thank you. We have savings to cover the time anyway so that’s not a problem as we want to maximise the time we have with her and have some time as a family. I think I will go back in October.

I am almost in exactly the same position as you.. 3 month old DD, teacher doing split parental leave. I am going back after the October break and my partner is taking from Oct to Jan. I don't think I would be ready to go back in August (Scotland, so back earlier) and it is a bonus that I don't have to do the classroom set up for a new class either! Go for October!

That’s really strange! Similar usernames too! Haha! I think my decision is made - no new class set up is a big bonus!