How to get 8 month old to sleep in cot

[Theunexpectedk]

Hi, I’ve never posted here before but I really need some help.

I have an 8 month old that will literally only sleep if he’s being held. We didn’t have a great start when he was born with him having colic/reflux/milk allergy and he would literally scream constantly for at least for first 6 weeks he was born. We were so exhausted we would just sleep with him on us. Even when he got slightly better he was still pretty miserable and would never really sleep in his cot Moses basket. Cut along story short he will now only sleep if he’s held and currently sleep in bed with me and my husband but even the will only sleep if I hold him. Even if I put him down in the bed while I go to the toilet in the night he will start to wake up. I don’t get a good nights sleep at all as he’s constantly tossing and turning and still wants to bf constantly throughout the night. Not because he’s hungry but for comfort and because that’s the only way he knows how to get back to sleep if he wakes. He’s currently bf to sleep. He also screams histrectically if he’s placed in the cot.
I feel like I’ve got myself into a right mess and need to kick this bad habit now.
Please help and give me hope!

Does he have a dummy OP? Mine was like this the first few months and I went from him sleeping in my arms, then in bed next to me with dummy so if he woke I just popped it back in rather than fed him. Then he went into cot but I slept in his room so I could comfort him if he woke (countless times a night) then gradually i was able to leave but it took a few weeks.

I also used a sleepyhead at first, im certain it gave him that feeling of being held.

Sorry rushed response but just wanted to say it will get better just keep trying different things. Also is he still suffering with reflux? Raising the cot might work (unused book under mattress).

No he doesn’t have a dummy. I did try at one point to see if it would help him but he didn’t seem to be able to get to grips with it. I think he was just too old to introduce it.

His cot is still in our room as we have a 2 yo too and don’t want to put them both in the same room until he’s sleeping better. So I would be there if he woke in the night anyway.

I don’t think he is still suffering from reflux. He’s been discharged from the consultant in relation to this and have tried lifting the cot slightly but hasn’t seemed to work.

I wouldn’t mind if he woke up a few times a night. I just want him to be able to go in the cot and at least sleep in it for a few hours at least!

What about co-sleeping? At 8 months, neither of mine would have slept all night in a cot in a room by themselves. But they were both pretty much held to sleep in the first few months and also fed to sleep every feed. But we focused on moving from being held in the early months to bedsharing beside me (which can be done absolutely safely if you are breastfeeding). I would focus on transitioning to that and getting better sleep. You can worry about moving to the cot in time.

My 2nd one was still fed to sleep and bedsharing and waking 3 times a night at 8 months. He's 14 months now, self settles in his cot and sleeps 8pm to 5:30am. So it can improve quickly, but you do need to have a plan and stick it out (and it can be exhausting while you do it).

That gives me some hope! How did you eventually get them sleeping in the cot?
I know that things do get better eventually as I always bf my eldest to sleep and he would wake a few times a night until he was 2 and now at 2 1/2 I have to cuddle him to sleep for about 5 minutes and then he generally sleeps all night but I had more hope with him as he could sleep up to 6 hours in his cot.
I wouldn’t mind cosleeping so much but it’s my husband that is fed up of it and it’s causing a bit of a rift between us.

What about a mattress on the floor in his room? A double works met. Then you can lie with him to cosleep whilst he falls asleep and escape once he's asleep. Then you can cosleep if you need to if he wakes up.

We did this with cosleeping DS when he was 12mo. Worked really well and he started sleeping through.

*double works best!

This would be ideal and an idea I had but it’s just about lack of space unfortunately!