Lies we tell our children

[FirenzeandZooey]

the bird was old and sick

I don't know why that van with the tinkly tune playing keeps driving past our house

mummy was just joking when she said daddy looked like a halfwit in that hat

no the library doesn't have books about guns

that buzzing noise you heard coming from our bedroom last night? That was Mummy using the blender

The whales on the "Walking with Beasts" DVD are "wrestling". DS (aged 2.5) has managed to come across a lot of other animals in nature videos (and god forbid at the city zoo) "wrestling" and is always keen to point it out to as many as possible casual observers.

Gee, thanks NQC

when the ice cream van gos past playing its little tune, it means he has run out of icecreams

NQC..i didnt know anyone else was as bad as me!

when we were kids my sister had a nylon nightie that use to give her static. I told her they were sparks and if she kept being naughty then they would get bigger and set fire

Wilbur - "If you splash any more water out of the bath, it will go through the ceiling and break the television" - sadly not a lie in our house as last time it fused the whole house - DH did tell DS that if he did it again we would use his money to pay the electrician, though

Our ice cream man conveniently comes round at bedtime... dd1 believed for ages that it was the bedtime police checking up on her

I used to tell dd that the icecream man was the child catcher!
Also, she didn't like mint when she was younger. So when she asked if she could share my chocolate, I used to say, 'aw, sorry lovey, its got mint in it!'