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Venting, sorry - DH and bloody phone

2 replies

aidelmaidel · 26/04/2019 16:59

DD 16mo, getting a cold, been cranky all night, and I've been up and down to her while DH was sleeping, and then did breakfast and laundry and housework and the usual while DH was reading his phone. So this morning I put DD down for a nap and asked DH please to take over while I had a rest.

After 50 minutes (she usually naps for 40 in the morning) she was howling herself into a state so I gave up on the idea of having some downtime. DH was sitting on the sofa reading his phone. "I'm giving her time to rest," he said. No you're bloody not, you're reading your phone and letting her howl. She's obviously not resting so why on earth are you pretending like reading your phone is okay, eh?

And then he did that stupid thing where he doesn't tell her what's going to happen next (we're going to give you a clean nappy, we're going downstairs to put your coat on, we're going to sit you in the buggy), just grabs her and does stuff, and she hates that, who wouldn't, and so she cries and cries and then he gets huffy. I've asked him to talk to her, I've pointed out that if you tell her what's happening next she protests less, and he bloody doesn't, and it's rubbish for everyone.

Sorry. Some days I just want to put him out with the recycling.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
KCpip · 01/05/2019 22:39

I can totally relate. We’ve also got a 16 month old but also DD1 who is 3. Only advice I’d give (if you’re looking for any) is to try and give him some alone time with her. Eg. Leave the house! Maybe this happens already but if not, (sometimes that’s just how it is) try and find reasons to leave them to their own devices for a bit. I always find my OH starts to do things his own way and is more in tune after a bit of 1 on 1 time. But equally be prepared to not always agree with what he’s doing and say nothing! If it helps at all, with DD1 I definitely found my OH was much more involved once DD1 was talking more and things are easier in lots of ways by then anyway. But yes, can totally relate to most of what you’ve said, especially being on his phone.

aidelmaidel · 03/05/2019 18:08

I abandon the pair of them with some regularity, and they have got better at functioning together--I guess I just feel that if he parented smarter, he wouldn't find it such a giant chore, and then he wouldn't be such a pain in the arse to manage when I get home.

We need parental controls for spouses' phones. Ones that cut off the internet during meals and at bedtime.

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