How long to stop bf 4 month old and how to cope emotionally?

[hatchetface]

Posted in infant feeding but no replies so thought I'd try here..

My baby is currently 4 months old, and is breastfed. I need to stop breastfeeding by around 6 months for medical reasons so I have 2 months to make the transition, should I use the full 2 months to wind it down?

He's never had any formula before and only had expressed milk in a bottle a handful of times so I'm worried about taking breastfeeding away. He feeds a lot still (about 9-10 times a day) and loves it, he feeds really well and it's very comforting to him. We tried a tiny bit of formula yesterday and he went crazy, gagging and screaming and spitting it all out.

Mentally I'm nowhere near ready to stop but I don't have a choice, so want to make the change as easy as possible on both me and him. I want to cry when I think about it which I know is silly but it feels special and I won't be able to bf any future kids so it's a very emotional subject. Any ideas would be gratefully received!

Contact your health visitor, and ask where your nearest breastfeeding support group is, or for the contact details of a breastfeeding specialist. I’ve had absolutely loads of support from mine. I’m still bf, but they told me that they would be able to help me come up with a plan to wean dc off the breast if/when it was needed. Good luck!

I would start introducing a bottle feed now. If you leave it too late he might totally refuse a bottle (like mine!!).

I would slowly swap a breastfeed for a bottle between now and 6 months. Start with a morning bottle then add an afternoon. I think the hardest breastfeed to get rid of is the one they fall asleep to so I'd maybe try and not leave that until last to drop.

When he’s 6 months he will be starting food too so might be less interested in bm (I know he still needs milk, but he’ll have other stuff to distract him with from the change. I would personally in your situation feed him bm only till nearer to 6m, ideally while also getting him used to having some of his daily milk through a bottle or cup to help with the transition. Do the La Leche league have a phone line still? One to one advice might be easier than a group situation. If you feed till 6 months that’s more bm than the vast majority of UK children ever receive, so please don’t feel bad about stopping when you need to.

Just an idea don’t know if it would
Work but maybe slowly mix formula with pumped breast milk ( once he is happy with bottle ) as
The flavour may be slightly different ... the teat in the bottle maybe the wrong size to play about with size one and size 2 my little guy was in size two by about 10
Weeks ... size one started to make him extra windy as he was working to hard to get it out.

I breast fed for a little while ( hardly any milk so became pointless ) but he did well on tommiee tippee bottles ... the antic comic once’s were half price if you order on boots website when I looked the other day ( for one option ) heard great things about Mamm too ... every baby seams to prefer different makes x x good luck x.

Emotionally I was very sad I do miss that bonding and felt like a failure ... but my bubba doesn’t even remember the boob anymore ... they get over it quicker than us I think ... well done at making a success of it and sorry you have to give it up
So soon x x

I would start now. Some babies can switch between the two with no issues but for others it’s a really difficult transition. Maybe start with one bottle a day at their hungriest time perhaps and make yourself scarce. They will be much less likely to take it if they can smell you and your milk. You could also express the first few times to just get them used to the bottle teat.
I’ve found stopping emotional both times but I think it may be the hormones. You’ve done a fantastic job doing it for 6 months. Some people struggle to do it at all and feel real guilt for that. It will be fine once you’ve got it sussed. As a PP advised professional help from your HV or feeding advisor may be a good idea too. Good luck

Mine always had expressed milk so the bottle wasn't an issue but the taste of formula was. I switched over several weeks by mixing, starting off with 90% breast milk and 10% formula and gradually upping it. The small ready mixed formula bottles were useful for this. It worked well. My baby didn't appear to notice the change.

I ebf but occasionally Express. Tried a couple of bottles (Tt and nuby) and found mam to be the best ones for my LO. It seems closer to the shape of my nipples when feeding.

Do what's best for you. I tend to Express so partner can give her the evening bottle and then she bf before bed and that works quite nicely.

No advice about when to stop unfortunately as I'm just taking each day but thankfully she does take a bottle too.

Thank you everyone, lots of good tips and might try the mixing expressed milk and formula then gradually upping the formula. Have a lovely health visitor so might give her a ring and get some support there too.

I didn't realise how much of an emotional thing it would be. Trying to look at it as a positive for getting this far in rather than a negative for having to stop. Mum guilt is REAL 😩

I think I will feel Guilty about something forever now ... but they are worth it x x good
Luck x x

No advice op, but I’m sorry to hear your journey is ending so soon.

You don’t have to answer of course, but are the medical reasons medication based? Just there is so much misinformation out there regarding medication and breastfeeding. It may be worth getting a second opinion if that’s the case?

@TheLastPharl unfortunately not, I need a breast MRI as at a very high risk of getting breast cancer and they need you to have stopped feeding 3 months before they can do it so they can get a clear picture. Then having a preventative mastectomy next year so this will be the end of feeding for me

Oh I’m so sorry to hear that op. Absolutely no need for any guilt. You are doing what you need to stay alive for your beautiful baby. Wishing you all the best with your treatment

Sounds like you have done so well OP. Don't feel guilty, you have fed your baby beautifully, and now you need to take care of your health xxxx