So tomorrow night is the night (sleep training)

[NotSoThinLizzy]

So I've decided to start sleep training tomorrow night DD is away till the 17th so DS crying won't disturb DD. I'm looking to get him to self settle mostly not really bothered about him sleeping through really just the settling. Hes 18 months now and still breastfed to sleep. Im pregnant again early days though so would ideally be weaned by October. So what's the best way to go about it?

Anyone?

I have heard the Lucy Wolfe book is good she has a blog I think and on social media but I've not tried it.

Do you have a partner op? What does your ds's sleep look like now?

I did the gradual reyreat/withdrawal thing, in similar circs. Ds1 was 13 months and I was pregnant
He's stopped falling to sleep on the boob, so was being cuddled to sleep then put in cot. I spent a couple of weeks cementing the routine, and also introducing a bottle (Not baby bottle, but a silicon soppy cup type thing) of milk. So we did bath, pjs, story X 2. Cuddle and milk while mobile played, then into cot asleep. I changed it to cuddle then into cot with milk while mobile played. I stayed with him, standing over the cot to soothe him as her literally never fallen asleep on his own til.then.

Took 75 minutes the first night but no crying. Lots of singing patting and stroking. Within a week it was down to 20 minutes with me sitting next to the cot. I gradually (very gradually) moved away until I was at the stage (after maybe 8 weeks or so) where I put him.on the cot then went out of the room. There were times of resistance and sone whinging but not crying. He started sleeping better at night and went from several wake ups to sleeping 7pm to 4.30am, in that 8 weeks. Then I'd take him in bed with me for a feed and snooze back to sleep which he did til around 19 months when he started waking at 6am.

He will feed to sleep and usually stay asleep until about 7.30 sometimes 9.00. Getting him to sleep can be a long time up to an hour. Even if I just lay the ground work so hes not crying when dd comes back it'll be perfect. He knows when hes tierd he'll grab is blanket and ask for boob or try to go for his cot. He only usually naps and sleeps in his cot. Not usually anywhere else.

Also OH works most days and isn't keen on helping but in the long run it'll be better for everyone if DS can self settle

I don’t see the issue here? Am I being dim? He sleeps through?

Oh ffs sorry, just reread your op!! I’ve done a similar “gradual retreat” thing before. I must admit I swapped boob for bottle, though, then changed bottle to earlier on in the evening anc settled them by placing my hand on their tummy.

Because I dont want him to need my boob to fall asleep anymore. I would like to put him in his cot after a good bedtime routine and him to fall asleep on his own.

Because I dont want him to need my boob to fall asleep anymore. I would like to put him in his cot after a good bedtime routine and him to fall asleep on his own.

Just reread the reply sorry for getting a bit defense and God knows why it posted twice 😂

Good luck Op. I think though if your child sleeps through then the process shouldn’t be too bad as he can obviously self settle himself back to sleep in the night.

I’d just feed him as normal, then brush teeth, read book and then put him in his bed and leave to be honest. He obviously has the skills, he’s just not used to it. The first night might take a while with crying, but he’ll probably get used to it quickly.

If that sounds too harsh then I’d do the same but stay with him. Maybe pat his back or something til he’s settled. Then gradually withdraw that til he’s going to sleep on his own

Yeah he can self settle most of the time it's just the getting him to sleep most of the time. There's been one or two times hes falling asleep himself on the sofa with me sat beside him so I'm thinking it's time

I stopped feeding to sleep in process of weaning off bf at around 21 months. I would feed a short feed an hour before bed. But I would still cuddle my DS to sleep and still do now.

I think the self settle thing is a tough one. Honestly once in bed we now get to sleep in 15 mins, but a routine had to made. He initially struggled to stay still in. He would just keep trying to get up. We choose 3 books and I have a light that gradually dims. On the final book I put on his musical thing that plays sleep music. Sometimes I have to make up this story as the light is pretty dark.

I found talky radio really useful with DS1 who was good at self settling, tbf, but only if there was background noise. The World Service was our saviour when he was a young toddler