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Parenting

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Original poster

Struggling emotionally

7 replies

Karid1496 · 06/04/2019 18:35

Needing a rant and a wee pick me up. I'm. Struggling so much just now. My daughter is now a teenager at high school and I feel like I have no clue what I'm doing. She is quite quiet and introverted, seems to have a good wee group of friends but just never seems to go out. I see her neice of a similar age and all the more outgoing girls in her class out all the time and I can't help but feel that shes missing out. I have a big fear that she's going to end up lonely. The worry is getting far too intense and I feel like I don't know how to parent her anymore. Any advice or reassurance would be very much appreciated

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LouB1990 · 07/04/2019 00:19

Hi all I can say is I am pretty shy and keep myself to myself. I always have done, I don’t like to go out and socialise a lot it’s just not me. I do have friends, a partner of 10 years and a baby on the way. I’m happy With my life. I don’t want or need to spend a lot of time with others. As long as she is happy & confidant In herself I wouldn’t worry xx

Infradoug · 07/04/2019 00:47

Another introvert here. I'm a big believer in out of school hobbies - mine helped me meet a number of new friends when I was a teenager, and eventually grew into a surprisingly decent social life outside of school. Does she have any favourite subjects that could be developed further in a local club, like a sport or singing/acting?

Bluemama46 · 07/04/2019 10:52

She does dancing two nights a week and is getting ready to have a weekend away with them, which she has said I'm not allowed to go on as she is more proactive when I'm not there! I know in my heart that she is coping well socially, that she's just a home body and she's doing the things that make her happy, but for some I've gotten myself into this worry hole and I can't seem to get myself out of it 😢

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YourSarcasmIsDripping · 07/04/2019 11:15

Do you feel lonely...left out?

Bluemama46 · 07/04/2019 11:57

Yes, very much so lately. Think that's why I'm struggling so much just now, if I could get rid of the worry and low self esteem I'd be a much better parent xx

YourSarcasmIsDripping · 07/04/2019 12:17

So this is more about you than her. You're projecting your feelings onto her. Be careful as you might drive her away. If she is happy as she is and has a balance then she's fine, you're also a good parent to raise her to reach this point.

However it seems like you need to work in yourself. Do you have any support? Anyone you can talk to? Have you tried seeing your GP and see if they can help?

Bluemama46 · 07/04/2019 12:39

Very much my problem and not hers. I have been to my gp but felt the help wasn't very helpful, was basically told to pull up my big girl panties. I have ordered a few cbt workbooks so I'm going to make time to do them. Have felt very exhausted by it this weekend so was just looking for a wee pick up and some helpful suggestions. Xx

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