DD is 17 and her mates/fellow students also 17/18 year old's. She's done a particular fairly artistic sport since she was little and does that sport regularly, in front of audiences, in a variety of halls and different types of venue.
Music is involved and there can be PA (public address) technology used between sessions eg microphone-based announcements, compering, some lighting. I'm getting to it I promise! There is an adult who provides the PA/compering/sound system/sound mixing type stuff for these events that are linked to this particular club (so it's not uncommon for him to be at two or three of these a year).
I have NO reason to suspect he's done anything wrong and want to make that very clear. NONE. BUT, I just have a poor feeling about him - I cannot say any more than that. And I just want to figure out what I should do about it, if anything.
I've in the past said to DD, something's off about this guy, I don't like him, watch him.
Things I don't like:
- Either he has friend requested her (this is inappropriate if it is the case, in my opinion), and a number of her friends, or they have friend requested him and he has accepted (inappropriate and foolhardy on his part and he should have more sense - imo)
- Bearing in mind at the event just gone her and her friends are getting changed and re-changed in back several times throughout an event (he wouldn't be there in the changing room obviously, not saying he is) but he is around near the changing rooms or in the warm-up areas prior to the event actually starting. After the most recent event a picture popped up on DDs SM of her on the right, him in the middle, her friend on the left, all with bodies facing forward but heads turned sideways on to the camera (so one person's front was facing another person's back), one knee up with their right hands on the back of the person in front meaning his hand was (fully flat) on my DDs back. Totally 'innocent' photo but again, seems a bit silly on his part and he should be doing his job, not hanging out out back with teenage girls taking goofy pics
- then to support their higher education applications if they chose to go on and study the topic at uni, they had photo's taken by a professional photographer at their club. It's the comments underneath which I don't like both from him - and my DDs response (which I think was made in blind innocence and her not thinking that his comment was a bit
. He comments on the photo "Now this is special (heart emoji)", she responds "Like you", which he responds with 'embarrased at the praise' emoji. This is picture of her in a leotard and tights by the way being held in a gravity-defying pose by a male sportsperson.
I'm cross with her and will at the very least be saying FFS what an idiotic comment to make to this man, understand boundaries and appropriateness you wally.
But I think the school should be having words (I think they should but I'm really not sure - as I say, I don't THINK he's done anything wrong nor do I know he intends to) but it's a bit skirting the edge of sensible behaviour on his part and I do think, in light of the fact he's 'exposed' to girls this age he should be aware of his own personal risks and taking proper and sensible precautions which include not taking photos with them, not touching them (even just on the back) and not sending them messages like that on FB.
It just got my dander up and the minute I saw it the other night I just wanted to contact him and say "get your hand off my daughter's back" (momma bear force is strong in this one.
Thoughts? I want to reiterate, don't think anything has gone on but I just don't like it, it's off for me, just slightly off. As we know, people who prey on young children/teens often put themselves into jobs where they have access to them (I'm not being paranoid, I'm being realistic). As an example, in Yr 6 a friend's DD received unprovoked highly inappropriate email contact from a man thru Google +/YouTube - he worked as a child's disco DJ....