I want to leave newborn DD with DH and disappear

[Pleasecaneveryonegoaway]

DD is 3 weeks old and screams at the top of her lungs for no obvious reason. She’s got the worlds loudest cry and is constantly hungry which doesn’t help. I think she hates me.

I also have a ‘D’H who rarely makes mistakes and I fuck up all the time so I feel like the worlds worst mother and wife who can’t do anything right. I’m fed up of being snapped at and being made to feel like a bad mum when I do a million more things than him.

My latest fuck up is not screwing up the lid for her bottle properly which I know is annoying but if it was the other way around, I wouldn’t have said anything. It was a genuine mistake and I’m working on 4 hours broken sleep a day so would like a little big of slack when making said fuck ups but he just had to make a point of it as I’m trying to nap.

Just a rant really. It’s been this shit for the past 3 weeks.

Has anyone else felt like this?

It's hard no matter what. You are recovering from birth too.
Babies are hard work. I'll get the health visitor round and have a chat.
I'm an experienced Mum and with my last baby I struggled so much breast feeding and he wanted to feed all day. So painful I used to cry I was so sore. I got some advice and I managed to continue.
Do what you can and get your husband to help so you can sleep.

be kind to yourself. You are not fucking things up - sleep deprivation does nothing good to your mind and body and little things do go wrong. I don't have a newborn and after a few nights of insomnia this week managed to sideswipe my car with a parked car as I was so fuzzy (My 'D'H was less than sympathetic).

I wish I had be stronger for myself in the newborn days. if your DH makes you feel small, let him know. Your body is healing from giving birth and you are working through the biggest learning curve of your life with next to no sleep. And the best way for your body and mind to heal? Sleep! Yes, it is hard for partners too - I get that. Until you get some semblance of routine in your life everything is very much upside down while they continue their routine as before.

You have my complete sympathy. I hope things improve soon. Have you been able to get out for a little walk with your baby at least? Even 5 minutes fresh air / change of scene can do wonders. Just remember, be gentle and kind to yourself

Been there so many times. I do however point out that to make a mistake you actually have to do something first. As mistakes correlate.

Your baby would miss you so much, but it's tempting to say go on then bye !

I remember those early days and they are shit.

Family and friends are key. If they can take baby for an hour every so often so you can recharge your batteries.

Infacol is good. My one was on it for quite a long time.

Your husband needs to support you more. You need to have a frank conversation with him. Set out what you expect from him as Baby's dad.

Talk to your HV too. You might need more outside support.

You poor thing.
So many of us have been there.
Tbh, if you are formula feeding, it isn't worth the hassle of expressing. You would be better spending that time sleeping/ eating/ having a shower or whatever.
I agree that you should have a break and leave your husband to manage for a day and a night.

Another one who has been there. Please hang in there, do what you need to do and take it one day at a time but don't be afraid to ask for help
The lack of sleep is brutal.
Congratulations on your dd.

He did throw it in my face that I’d had a 5 hour nap last weekend

I'm tempted to say give his balls a good hard squeeze if he says anything like that again, but it might be classed as assault so best not.
He really needs to step up. He's a father now. The way to go at weekends is that he manages Friday and Saturday nights and the following mornings so that you get a chance to catch up on sleep. If he can't grasp that sleep is s necessity not a luxury then start by him being on duty for either one of those nights and work up to him doing both.
Talk to your health visitor as well.
I hope it gets better for you.

He has said he will do the early morning feed tomorrow so I can get a lay in. He did throw it in my face that I’d had a 5 hour nap last weekend. I only had it as I’m averaging a few hours a day and he’s getting 7/8

Tell him you will swap.

He can not sleep for a week and you will allow him a whole 5 hour nap on Sunday and you will criticise his every move.

Another one who thinks you could be better off with out him if he can’t appreciate what you are going through and the lack of sleep on a body that has just been through childbirth