I’ve been picking DD up wrong. Have I broken her?

[fuckbeingaparent]

DD is 2 weeks old and I’ve got no experience of children.

How have you been picking her up? Have you had a visit from a health visitor? I had zero experience of babies either, and the health visitor was fab.

I'm sure you haven't broken her!

That was clever of me

I’ve been picking her up under her armpits at times (although not always) without realising it’s wrong)

I don’t think I’ve hurt her but I’m worried anyway. I’m really anxious and PFB. Obviously not going to pick her up like that now.

She will be fine OP. As long as arms agent been bending the wrong way and her head has been supported I'm sure there is no damage done.

I picked my daughter and granddaughter up from underneath the armpits, head supported.
Is this not the right way? I seriously didn’t realise that there was a specific way we had to pick them up!!
But don’t worry, neither of them are broken!

I picked my babies up like this sometimes. It kinda supports the head automatically. I didn't know it was wrong to do so!

I doubt very much you have broken her! They are very resilient and tough! At this age just make sure her head is supported and you will become more confident and comfortable picking her up. I would pick my son up under his arms and just made sure his head was supported and put him in my arms to carry him. I’m sure you’re doing great! X

Just scoop her up gently with your arm under her head. Do not expect to do everything perfectly - babies are pretty resilient.

My youngest GS was picked up by his older sister aged 3 when he was a few days old - DD went upstairs leaving him in a rocker on the floor and came back down to find baby on sofa on big sister's lap - goodness knows how she got him there - certainly not in a HV recommended fashion I am sure! He is fine!

And.......shh.......I once accidentally dislocated my DD's elbow when she was about 3! She survived too.

Try and relax - I know it is hard first time round.

Who said that was wrong? As long as her head is supported she’ll be fine. I’m a midwife and have picked up babies with my hands under their arms many a time

As long as you've not been picking her up by his ear or something she'll be fine. I used to pick mine up under their armpits sometimes, with a couple of fingers behind their head to support it. And I regularly picked up my twins by the front of their babygros, and they seem to be ok, don't panic, babies are pretty resilient.

Who told you that was wrong? I did that all the time with the DCs, as long as head and neck supported and you're not dangling by the armpits I don't see what's wrong with picking them up that way! I just did it that way because the midwives and paediatric consultant did in hospital (I also had no experience of babies so I just copied what they were doing).

Is that not right? I always picked DD up like that and she's about to turn 4, so can't be that bad!

That’s ok then!

I was worried. I always support her head obviously.

I’m in constant fear that I’m going to accidentally hurt her

If her head is supported then it's ok, don't worry.
My BIL once lifted my 6 month old niece out of her cot upside down.
Mind you it was dark but still...
She threw up straight away and quite a few times the same day.

I’m in constant fear that I’m going to accidentally hurt her

Welcome to parenthood!

I always did it that way with mine, like you supporting their head.

I also well remember the terror I felt with a newborn each time, how tiny they were. So I get it.

Nothing wrong with that as long as the head is supported, I'm sure you're doin a top job op

To be honest I'm not convinced that it even matters if you don't always support her head! They're tougher than they look! Have you read 'This is going to hurt'? In that he says he reckons you could probably pick a baby up by its head and it would still be fine, given the amount of force that they use in pulling a baby out with forceps!

(Obviously I don't recommend picking her up by her head - just to clarify!)

It's worth getting out of the habit - lots of parents are unaware that as the baby gets heavier picking them up in that way can give the parent tendonitis in the wrist.

@unaofstormhold how are you supposed to pick up a baby? Genuine question!

Peach, I'm no expert but as I understand it I think there are two things to avoid - one is always picking up your child the same way as that repeats the same strain over and over. Secondly try to avoid lifting under the armpits with your thumb at right angles to your fingers as this puts a lot of strain on your wrist. I think you can still pick up under the armpits (with fingers supporting the head if still small and floppy) but keeping your thumbs with your fingers and your wrists straight. Even better is to scoop with palms up from under the bottom, with another hand under the head for a newborn. There are lots of tips available online - try searching for DeQuervain's tendonitis or Mummy's thumb.