TERRIBLE TWOS ???!!

[MummyBearEst2009]

SO. My 2 year old (turned 2 in September),has always been a happy and content, although very hyperactive and full of beans and climbs on EVERYTHING. Nothing I couldn't handle however. The eldest child,now 9, no issues as toddler whatsoever. The 2 year old has suddenly turned into what I can only describe as a living hell. I would like to know if I need to be concerned or if this is 'normal' because in all honesty, I can't freaking cope! So. In the pram? SCREAMS AND SCHREECHES, like the ones that get you dirty looks from passers by?yeah,that type of screaming. She's yelled so hard and for so long on one shopping trip that she gave herself a mini nose bleed! Clingy. Dear Lord is she clingy. And it's sudden. She will want carrying everywhere and will cling to me for dear life. Eating. Ha!!!what's that??!! Fussy with food and mill as well now it seems. Screams for milk, give her milk,then screams for milk?? Umm what???!!!! Shouts at me that she can't drink it. So I take it away which is followed by yep,further screaming, going sweaty and a huge meltdown. Not very interested in food really. Will eat but not how she used too. At moments she genuinely seems to be incredibly sad for no obvious reason and will cry and tell me she is sad and will not want to do anything because of this. Nap times. Nah not happening anymore. Unless you count exhausting herself with her screaming til she passes out all sweaty , waking up about 10 minutes later screaming again. She is having good moments and MOST nights sleeps right through as she always has and plays with her toys lovely and has her bath lovely. I'm hoping this is the terrible two's however I never experienced this with my eldest so someone please help a mummy out. Thank you !!!

It's pretty unusual for a 2 year old to express that they are sad. How's her speech? Is she very verbal? Has anything changed in her life to make her feel sad?

If she's screaming in the pushchair, is she front facing or facing towards you? Whichever way she is facing, can you face her the other way?

I had something like <a class="break-all" href="https://m.ebay.co.uk/itm/Tommee-Tippee-Explora-Snack-N-Go-Pot-Independant-Feeding-Pink-orange/223173390581?ulref=rover.ebay.com/rover/1/710-53481-19255-0/1?ff3=2&toolid=10040&campid=5338443598&customid=EAIaIQobChMIv5Dv6oiB4QIVbgHTCh2SUA27EAQYEiABEgJNzfDBwE&lgeo=0&vectorid=229508&item=223173390581&srcrot=710-53481-19255-0&rvrid=1894670369258&rvrts=7b05cb6c1690aadc2e3642fcffeec5ad&mwBanner=1&rdt=1&ul_noapp=true&pageci=9912b891-673c-4950-a787-a79c92f02492" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">like this smack pot which helped to keep them quiet and got a bit of food into them.

If she's clingy, that's perfectly normal. I'd try to go with it as much as you can. At 2 they need a lot of time from you. If it's getting to you though, there are some tips for easing separation anxiety here.

I think you need to stop the milk too and ignore the tantrums. Decide how much you're going to give her, say 300 ml over the day and when you're giving it, say split between after lunch and before bed and simply don't give in. Just keep refusing calmly and ignore the tantrums. Could you offer her a snack and a cuddle instead of milk?

I think she's worked out that screaming gets her what she wants and you upset which for her is a double result. If you can't cope with the tantrums, there's a good book called Calm Parents, Happy Kids which should help you out.

As for the naps, can I ask what you've tried so far? Does she have a regular time for her nap? Have you tried putting her in your bed and cuddling her to sleep?

Not sleeping in the day won't help her behaviour, so I'd really work on getting her to nap. One and half hours would be the ideal if you can crack it

It might be worth doing the m-Chat too, just to rule out ASD.

It all sounds pretty normal to me I’m afraid. But have you been to the GP to rule of ear infection etc? Does she have all her teeth yet. Molars are can be very painful for some children.

Does she have snacks and toys in the buggy? We avoid the buggy generally.

DD needed to drop naps not longer after turning two. Cuddling to sleep was/is her normal sleep method she just nolonger needed a nap. They still need the same amount of sleep so they need to go to bed the same length of time + 30 mins earlier to account for overtiredness. It was a tricky two weeks.

DD rarely has big tantrums now but the only thing that works for her is to sit in the floor with her and wait it out. Any intervention or reassurance makes it work.

Suddenly at 2 they don’t grow as much so don’t need as much food but just keep giving her healthy meals as normal and don’t comment on what she eats. Keep an eye on her weight.

The book how to talk so little children listen is good.

I would go to the GP and rule out pain as an option

I agree with PP about GP to rule out any ear or throat issues causing pain.

How is her communication? It sounds like she's getting very frustrated/upset/sad that she can't express what it is that she wants.