Daughters aged 6-11 should they wear bikini's?

[LucyD1911]

I am not on the fence on this one. I firmly believe objectifying our girls at such a young age can only lead to more psychological issues later on in their lives, regarding negative body consciousness, possible eating disorders and feeling of inadequacy due to how they look, and what others expect them to wear and show. It is the sexualisation of children and it doesn't matter how it is justified by saying, "everyone does it" , "it's harmless really", "I like my daughter to have a great tan"; it's more damaging than we believe it is. Why would we ask our daughters to wear sexy lingerie at the beach which has been reduced in size for a girls body shape, and with a kids print to make it appear more child acceptable. It's like Ann Summers creating a baby doll nightie sticking Miss Kitty on it, and reducing the size for 8 year olds. Is that acceptable?

O think bikinis are fine. They are just a style of clothing.

However I agree about adult styles.

If a child is wearing bottoms and top I assume it's because their choice is to cover genitalia and breasts. No idea why but I find it uncomfortable seeing girls in triangle tops and tie string bottoms which do t work for their purpose (usually!) in un developed girls.

Tankinis and crop tip styles are certainly more practice for toilet visits!

I don't see bikinis as a problem. Highlighting them as a sexualised and risque thing is. I'd allow my DD to wear whatever she liked on the beach. She chooses swimwear based on things like it's colour, whether it's got unicorns on etc. I would hate to feel I needed to intervene and explain that in my eyes it's 'sexy'. That's not her problem- she's oblivious.

I don't think it 'sexualises' them (though I do see many doing the whole posing / pouting / selfie thing in sunglasses and bikini....), I just don't know why anyone would think that nipples, specifically, need covering.

Why do kids want to wear a little bikini top that covers their nipples?

A T Shirt is a cover up and protection from the sun. A bikini top hardly plays that role?

It is the sexualisation of children

No it isn't.

sexy lingerie

No it isn't.

It's like Ann Summers creating a baby doll nightie sticking Miss Kitty on it, and reducing the size for 8 year olds

No it isn't.

Both my kids wanted bikinis when they were younger. Now they both wear 1 pieces with t shirts over. It’s just clothes.

Oh no, they need as much coverage as possible for sun protection.
M&S is where we buy, they offer lots with long sleeves / leg. It's nothing to do with the style I just want to be careful in the sun. Also, a sun hat with neck coverage.

In an indoor swimming pool I don't see a problem with a bikini if that's what the kid wants to wear. But I wouldn't suggest it or be overly keen on the idea of purchasing one. Seems like a waste buying a swim outfit they can't also wear in the sun.

Start telling girls what to wear or not wear and you teach them it is not their body and not their decision to make.

Bottoms only, bikinis, one piece, t-shirt over boxers - they decide.

I didn't wear a bikini at that age but I did where a (sports brand) tankini most of the time. I always found swimming costumes so uncomfortable.

I was definitely in a bikini at 14 but can't remember how early I first had one.

I don't think Bikinis are all equal though. There is definitely a a difference between a normal bikini and a 'sexy' one.

Love that boden 2 piece with the shorts instead of knickers. Have you seen this? www.jodyandlara.com

And that's the point really. We find it so acceptable to put our DD's in nipple and gentalia hiding bikini's. We question the values of others by pointing out why wouldn't you wear it, like saying my DD is innocent I don't want to point out the why. Whose benefit is it for? If we want our girls to be protected from the sun, have fun on the beach, not worry about swimwear riding up, falling down and be able to go the loo easily why not a rash vest and shorts like boys wear?

Thanks everyone for you views, whether "for" or "against" girls in bikini's, what is clear is this subject is not "vanilla", and there are clear valid views on both sides. What is consistent is the UV protection for young skin on the beach and whether you tan easily or not, the long term effects of UV radiation are clear, it is the number one factor contributing to skin cancer. And with skin cancer on the rise, we can only do our best to protect both our skin and our families in the sun.

I don’t get your point now. If your primary concern is to limit exposure to the sun, boys are more at risk as their swimsuits cover even less, but either way swimsuits for either sex do not cover enough of the skin for Uv protection purposes.

Items of clothing are not sexualised. Most kids bikinis are not copies of Ann Summers - if that is what you see when you look at them I would question your mindset not the clothing. There are lots of lovely kids cossies which don't in any way look inappropriate. Your attitude seems on a kin with women being required to wear burqhas because other clothing is too revealing, inappropriate and sexual. The problem is not what women wear but the acceptance that men would be forgiven for seeing them as sexual. Shouldn't we being re-educating men not accepting this sexist nonsense?

As Booboo said, on the basis of your latter sun damage argument both girls and boys should wear those all in one UV protection garments at all times then?

You are right items of clothing are not sexualised, however the origin of the bikini was not a practical one, it was not designed for girls, it was designed for the beauty and sexual appeal of a woman. I'm not sure it's about educating men, that's another conversation. Although I do agree that it would be great to live in a society where you could wear want you want without fear or judgement. However that is not the society we live in... being slim, beautiful and sexy is held as the aspiration, and young girls put in this type of clothing only gives permission for us to perpetuate this belief, and perhaps psychologically for some this is not healthy. I don't think I have a mindset which see's perverse instead of innocence, I just believe that a bikini signifies something sexual for a women which has been applied to a young girl, and in today's world may be seen as acceptable. However what I do believe is girls wearing bikini's which were originally designed for women who want to both get a tan and feel sexy on the beach, is not suitable for young girls. I wouldn't go to the extreme of a burqa unless that is how you feel comfortable. However I hope you will understand where I'm coming from.

and feel sexy on the beach

Or because they are cooler than a one piece. I've never worn one to "feel sexy on the beach".

Dd is 11 and can choose what she's most comfortable in. Why is there even a discussion to remove her right to choose?

DD wears one piece suits because I don’t like bikinis. I also make her wear a rash vest the same as her brothers.
She’s 12 so probably won’t get away with making her wear the vest this summer but I still won’t be buying a bikini.

My DD's just wore bottoms until about age 9. As babies they were often naked. Pretty normal for Italian beaches. And before you flame me for sun damage we always hired a canopy, so they were out of the sun for most of the time anyway, and we were only on the beach from 9-12 and then came back at 4pm.

To suggest bikini's or less is sexual is frankly .

Skirts, dresses, low cut tops and bras were also designed with a specific view of women in mind, but that doesn’t mean that every woman who wears these items of clothing endorses that view. I might wear a skirt because I like it and not to appear sexy for the benefit of someone else. For example, I wear a bikini (or just the bottom part of one) because I hate the feeling of a wet suimsuit on my belly.

Both my son and daughter wear rash vests and shorts to swim in the sun. For sun protection.

Pretty much the same for swimming lessons but my daughter has a one piece with long sleeves she often wears.

Her previous swim teacher asked for her to wear a swimming costume rather than rash vest and shorts for lessons as it was "restricting movement".

Funny - adult surfers seem to do ok in rash vests! .