I've had many problems with Ex-husband being inconsistent with contact for my eldest child. He wanted my soon to be husband to adopt him because he said he didn't want to be a dad but then changed his mind. He has called me and my family c*nts on many occasions when I tell him to basically step up. He hasn't seen him since October as he's on tour in afghan with the army but contact was barely happening before that. When he came home for R&R we arranged for exh to see him and on the day I got our son ready and he messaged saying he wanted him overnight.. It was a school night and he was saying that he would have him at his Mum’s house which is over an hour or so away. I declined because he would be tired and wouldn't make it to school in time.. the traffic is usually bad around where we live as it is in the mornings. He said he doesn't have any fun and school at his age doesn't really matter. He attends different clubs which he enjoys and things like stage school etc. We take him to lots of lovely places to give him experiences and I always try my hardest to give him a good childhood. He said that I'm going to make him turn out like my brother (my brother is autistic....)
Today he said he has just signed off from the army and will be out in December. He said he will probably go to university and live about an hour away in London with his girlfriend and she will pay for all living expenses and give him money to see our son. He said he will see him once every fortnight unless he has social events he has to go to. I really worry about my sons emotional health he's only 4 and he doesn't understand why daddy is in and out. ExH never asks me how he's doing and I've offered for them to even FaceTime etc and he turns it down. So what is he actually going to contribute to our sons life? It's horrible to watch :( my dad was the same and it had such a negative effect on my childhood. Is there anything I can do? I don't know what to even think anymore. I don't want to see my little boy hurt. Sorry if this post doesn't make much sense.