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Original poster

Baby HATES classes, groups etc

14 replies

somersetmum2018 · 05/02/2019 15:12

I’ve been taking my 4month old DS to baby sensory, rhyme time at the library and baby massage classes for the last few weeks but every time we go to any of them, he has a total meltdown. Feeding him doesn’t calm him down and I end up feeling really embarrassed and upset. I make sure that he’s had a good long nap beforehand, that he’s fed etc - but it doesn’t seem to make any difference. I’m so envious of all the other mums having a lovely time bonding with and playing with their babies, while mine is thrashing about and screaming.

I don’t want to make him do classes if he absolutely hates them (plus baby sensory etc isn’t exactly cheap!) but at the same time, it ensures I get out of the house and talk to other human beings!

Did anyone else’s babies behave like this? And should I stick with the classes, or accept defeat?

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Hiphopopotamous · 05/02/2019 15:43

Mine was the same. He got much happier when he could sit up properly and mobilise. Hated being put down for even a second and wouldn't let me ignore him to chat to anyone.

He's now almost two and really confident going off on his own at playgroups. And because of all the hours I put in entertaining him while he was in my arms, he's super bright and got loads of words.

Stick with it, it won't be forever.

TickleMeEmo · 05/02/2019 15:56

Mine was the same, just seemed to be frustrated and angry at that age whenever we did activities.
He’s now a (mostly) happy, confident sociable nearly 2 year old, like pp he seemed to get more from these things once he could sit up and move about of his own free will.
I couldn’t really afford to take him to paid classes after it was clear he didn’t enjy them, but continued with the free ones like book bug at the library etc

TickleMeEmo · 05/02/2019 15:58

Meant to add, we did start doing the odd paid activity again once he appeared to be more engaged/settled at the free ones.

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Lemoneeza · 05/02/2019 15:59

I didn't start going to classes till mine was walking, about 13 months.
arrange to meet another parent for coffee or something if you want company. groups before one are a waste of time imo.

Bumblebee39 · 05/02/2019 16:01

Maybe he's just too young? In which case you could go to groups for you whilst he's asleep, or just wait until he's older?

Fusioluxe · 05/02/2019 16:04

Be prepared to go for just ten minutes. It may just be the stimulation, lots of noise, other babies.. Leave after a short while before baby gets really worked up, maybe just walk around showing him a few things, and then go out. He’ll soon get the idea that this is somewhere to go for a short time and then you’re going home again.

punishmepunisher · 05/02/2019 16:05

Haha! My DM always tells me that I was exactly like this as a baby.

As an adult I am an introvert/solitary person/INFJ, and it seems that this came out when I was a baby. I hated groups/noise/joining in with things/playing with other children. I'd toddle off and find myself a book or a puzzle or something to do on my own.

I much preferred quiet time, being read to, being around animals over humans. And i'm exactly the same now!

God, give me a kindle, a glass of wine, and a cat on my lap over anything involving noise or socialising any day.

CottonSock · 05/02/2019 16:06

Always worth asking if you can do a trial session of a new class before signing up.

Singlenotsingle · 05/02/2019 16:08

He's much too young. At 4m he's not even sitting up yet. Don't rush him into doing things he's not ready for yet!

PolarBearDisguisedAsAPenguin · 05/02/2019 16:08

Sounds like overstimulation. Why don’t you opt for baby groups where the emphasis is on the mums having a cup of tea, biscuit and chat, whilst the babies sleep?

ChoccyBiccyTastic · 05/02/2019 16:14

Bless you. He's 4 months old. He doesn't give a shit about Rhyme Time, and believe it or not, neither do the quiet 4-month-olds. Just don't go.

Sing the songs with him at home. Playtime with Mummy is the most important thing in the world to him after milk. He doesn't need other people. Do the group's later, when he's mobile, and you want him to share, etc.

Wallsbangers · 05/02/2019 17:21

We did baby yoga/massage and he hated it. Every week he cried, he always wet through his outfit, always needed feeding so we stopped going. He liked baby sensory from the start (about 3 months) so we kept going with that and dipped into other classes occasionally to see if he liked it. I liked a class as a clueless ftm to help give me ideas of how to play, relearn songs & rhymes and it felt less forced in the mum chat aspect.

Original poster

somersetmum2018 · 05/02/2019 18:34

Thank you for all the advice! I think I’ll give the next set of baby sensory classes a miss and see how he is in a couple of months

OP posts:

lovely36 · 06/02/2019 12:43

At 4 months that will all be way to overstimulating. New surroundings, new people, it's very overwhelming and in fact that will be hurting him rather than helping him. Listen to your baby and how he feels. If he doesn't like it then stop doing it. Try when he's a little older. Xx

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