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Parenting

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Original poster

3 year old fights nap but needs nap

19 replies

brookshelley · 15/01/2019 06:28

DD 3 years old has been actively fighting a nap for months, yet she is tired and cranky all afternoon. The days we can get her to nap, she is in a better mood and less prone to tantrums. But it can take up to 1 hour of effort to actually get her to nap. If we can get to that point she will sleep for an hour but we're chasing her around, begging her to lie down, reading 3/4/5 stories - it's just TOO MUCH.

She currently wakes up 6:30-6:45 AM and bedtime is 7:30 PM. Should we give up on the nap and just push bedtime earlier like 7 PM?

Anyone experienced the same?

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Kikipost · 15/01/2019 06:29

Abandon the nap
Park her in front of CBeebies for 40 mins with a blanket and teddy
And then bedtime 7pm

Jackshouse · 15/01/2019 06:31

Time for the nap to go and bring bedtime the length of the nap plus 30 mins earlier.

Limpshade · 15/01/2019 06:34

Yeah I think if she's fighting it, then she doesn't really need it. It might be that you need it more?! Said with sympathy because I'd feel exactly the same!

Give her some downtime as PP have suggested and look forward to an early bedtime

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Original poster

brookshelley · 15/01/2019 07:01

Time for the nap to go and bring bedtime the length of the nap plus 30 mins earlier.

So 6:30/6:45?! That seems so early! Although I think she must need it.

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Original poster

brookshelley · 15/01/2019 07:03

It might be that you need it more?!

Honestly her mood is just so terrible when she doesn't get enough sleep and she takes it out on everyone. She has always been like this since she was born - prone to fighting sleep but then happy and angelic when she actually get it.

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OhHolyJesus · 15/01/2019 07:12

My DS was the same for about a week last year and we pushed through and still has the nap most days but not all.

If we go out and he's on his bike or running around a lot he will definitely nap so maybe more exercise in the morning and on the days she's not as tired just read and chill and buckle up for the inevitable tantrums before bed.

I need the nap every day so I do push for him to have it and he is a much nicer person when he does but I don't win them all!

Jackshouse · 15/01/2019 07:14

She needs 12 hours sleep and if she is tired bedtime may take longer. After a few weeks you maybe able to drop the extra 30 mins but there is nothing worse than an over tired toddler.

AlsoBling2 · 15/01/2019 07:14

I think when they drop the nap they need an earlier bed time. Very very early for a bit. So yes, if bring it forward to 630. After a couple of months you can probably go back to a bit later.

sleepycat13 · 15/01/2019 07:43

I agree. drop the nap and bring bedtime forward as suggested for the transition period. you may find she gets used to it quicker than you think and before long you can gradually move the bedtime later a bit. I've always been told if in doubt bring bedtime earlier and an earlier bedtime shouldn't equate an earlier wake time.

also agree whilst she is struggling build in some down time to your routine too. tv or books and cuddles on sofa mid afternoon to allow her to wind down a bit and help her get through the afternoon

good luck

MaverickSnoopy · 15/01/2019 08:03

I was talking to someone a while back in a similar position. They ended up implementing down time instead of nap time. So they took their child up to their room, closed curtains and put on low lights and gave them lots of books. They set the grow clock and said that when the sun came up it would be time for down time to end. Apparently worked really well and he used to doze off on occasion too.

It might be worth a try? I'd give it a go on the basis that she's grouchy without a nap. My first was like this and napped until she was 4 even though she fought it on occasion. Conversely dd2 who is 2.5yo went through a phase of resisting nap for about 2 months. Everyone told me to drop it but we powered through and now she loves a nap again.

DippyAvocado · 15/01/2019 08:08

There's always a few months horrible transition when they drop the nap!

Can you try a nap some days and not others? I would take mine out for a drive on the days they seemed especially tired.

Original poster

brookshelley · 15/01/2019 08:35

They set the grow clock and said that when the sun came up it would be time for down time to end. Apparently worked really well and he used to doze off on occasion too.

Good idea - we have tried and failed having a "quiet time." But never deployed the Gro Clock, have only been using it at night.

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Tea16 · 15/01/2019 08:38

There are 3yo that nap??? Mine dropped all naps at 21 months.

They wouldn't even try and put a 3yo down for a nap in my kids nursery. I agree with pp in that nap needs the drop and accept an earlier bed time. My 1yo sometimes goes to bed at 630pm if he needs it. Don't clock watch as much.

DappledThings · 15/01/2019 08:58

Tea16 My very nearly 3 year old will happily still have 2 hours or so.

His room at nursery goes up till pre-school which is the next room and most of them nap. When I first visited they had 16 of them all fast asleep on crash mats!

Cutesbabasmummy · 15/01/2019 09:34

Agree with other posters - abandon the nap and do an earlier bedtime. We abandoned naps at about 2 and a half as DS did not want to go to bed! DS is in the pre school room at nursery (since last September) and none of them nap.

CosmicComet · 15/01/2019 09:36

Ewan the Dream Sheep worked for us. We played it every time DS was dozing off and now he associates the sound with going to sleep. So playing it quite often makes him sleep.

TimeForWhat · 15/01/2019 09:40

My DD is nearly 3 and gave up her naps just before Xmas (similar age to when DD1 did). I tried to persevere with DD1 and it was quite hard going. With DD2, I've decided that if she doesn't want to nap then I won't force it. It becomes too stressful for everyone- she can be a bit grumpy in the afternoon but so can my 4 year old !

May just be time to drop the nap

Original poster

brookshelley · 16/01/2019 07:44

Yesterday she had no nap and I got her into bed at around 7 PM. She went down easily but woke up at 4 AM crying and refusing to go back to sleep. So that was a bit of a struggle. But I know transitions are hard so I will keep at the early bedtime for at least a week and see how we go. Tonight might even be 6:45 PM because she was awake for awhile overnight.

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ThePastafarian · 16/01/2019 09:07

DD is 2 and 4 months, and I find (as someone said up thread) that if we haven't done much in the morning then the nap is a battle. If we've got up and gone out - park, soft play, toddler music class - it comes much easier. At the moment she naps about 5 days out of 7, and that works okay for now. There are days I just can't get her up and out - when other stuff takes over - and I just have to give up the nap on those days. She's tired by tea time, and we have slightly earlier bedtime, but it works okay. I find she can skip one nap okay, but the second or third day with no nap is exhaustion central! It'll undoubtedly have changed in another few months, but the flexible approach is getting us through the transition!

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