I separated from my ex 14 years ago when my son was only a few months old due to domestic violence. I had always allowed him to see the kids regardless of this, which was typically with his parents. Over the years he has been a let down of a father, never helped financially with their upbringing and always upsetting the children with broken promises. And its always been me and the children's step dad who have been there to pick up the pieces! BIG UP THE STEP PARENTS OUT THERE! NOT AN EASY JOB!
Over the last couple of years the contact has been minimal, the last 12 months my son only wanted to see him 2 or 3 times. This xmas however he was spoilt and brought a motorbike and promised to be taken to tracks every weekend. then the seed was planted on how great it would be to move in with him and his new family. My son came home crying saying how much he missed his dad, how he would be happier over there, how he wanted to move school......I WAS SHOCKED!!!!
in the past few days the dad has been texting, callling what seems like every half hour to talk about how i am getting on with the move. how he misses his son and how hard it is to be away from him etc
i my eyes, my son has been spoilt and is loving the attention from his father, which i completely understand, but purely because what i have experienced over the past 14 years,i know this will not last. but my son is certain that he has changed this time. His older brother has tried to warn him, hes alot older and has been hurt so many times by his dad that he no longer wants anything to do with him. But my youngest still wants to go. This move means new school and he will be 2 hours away. i suggested going over every weekend to see how he feels in a months time or so but hes sure he wants to go. My son doesn't deal with change very well so this decision is very odd if not extreme!
i cried for 2 days solid, it felt like i had lost a son. how could he be choosing him over me. i have always put him first, i have sacrificed so much for his happiness. i have always tried to be fair and we have a relationship where we are like best friends, he is the biggest mummies boy i know out there. Everyone who knows us is soooooo shocked!!!!!!!!!
if i say no, he will hate me. I feel so sick typing this....
my question to you guys is would you let your son go? If yes what do i need to do to protect him and myself from the games i fear his dad is playing..........??