Sorry for the long post! dd is coming up to 12 weeks and is really hard to settle at night. I appreciate she's still so young and a routine is a no go yet but I really feel like we're doing something wrong.
She gets very ratty most evenings and generally we can't get her to go to sleep until 9/10pm. That's normally in my partners arms as she kicks off when he puts her in the moses basket. He works 9-5 Mon Fri so when he gets in I generally go to bed between 6-8 so that I can have a few hours uninterrupted before he brings her up (after she's been fed) at around 11pm-12am depending on when she wants feeding.
When she's brought up she is clearly tired and will lie in a typical sleeping position with her arms up by her head but she groans a lot and kicks her legs. I put my hand on her chest or stroke her head which calms her but every time I take my hand away she starts kicking and fussing again. Ewan sheep does nothing either. It can take upto an hour to finally settle her.
On a good night we'll then get 2-3 hours before she wants another feed then another 2 hours before she starts stirring again. She isn't often in a deep sleep and she makes a right racket stretching and groaning until around 6am so I end up bringing her downstairs. She then wants a feed again and then gets ratty in her moses basket but will sleep very soundly in my arms for a couple of hours.
On a bad night we're up every 30 mins to an hour as she she wants to be held (co-sleeping hasnt taken her fancy either she needs contact). I sometimes give up by 4am and bring her down as I'm aware my partner has to get up for work and will be knackered. We have just as many bad nights as good,probably more.
She likes feeding little and often. I try and stretch out how often she's fed in the day but she's generally hungry every 3 hours. I try and delay it for half an hour by giving her a dummy and then give her a bottle in the hopes she'll sink 5oz instead of 4oz but she still leaves a good oz most of the time.
Are we doing something wrong or is this just normal baby behaviour? A few friends bang on about how their babies slept through from a few weeks or slept at least 4-5 hours at a time and it's really winding me up! We've also got the MIL and my granny telling us to just put her in her cot at 7pm on her own and wont listen when I say that she's too young to sleep alone with the current guidance on SIDS. I get told I'm 'worrying too much' 😒