Bedtime, routines & SIDS guidance

[birdybirdbird]

How do other people organise bedtimes and introducing a routine, in line with the SIDS guidance that all sleeps should be in a room with you until 6 months?
LO is 14 weeks old and a reasonable sleeper. Currently he goes up with us at around 9.30-10pm, into sleep bag, has a feed, then settles into Snuzpod. He does a 5-6 hour sleep, then wakes for a feed and goes down for another 3ish hours. He used to be happy to start his sleep/nap in the lounge with us earlier in the evening but won’t anymore, I think the world has become too interesting!
What do other people do? I don’t see how you’re meant to introduce a bedtime routine before 6 months unless your then willing to go and sit in a dark room for the rest of your evening. My DH do actually quite like spending together! But equally, if we continue doing this until 6 months, will it then be a nightmare trying to introduce an earlier bedtime?!

That's not a reasonable sleeper. That's an incredible sleeper.

I can't comment on the rest because DD woke every 45 minutes to two hours until she was 2 yo. So she was downstairs with us because I couldn't have faced the stairs that much!

My DS slept downstairs with us until we went to bed. Then he was in the Snuzpod. I was so knackered that I went up with him around 7.30-8pm I'm afraid!

That's a really good sleeper, and my dd was the same. She's 5 months now and she slept in her cot for the first time last night (in our room) and had all her naps upstairs with a monitor on. I have been going up to check on her every 10 mins or so also. It is against Sids guidelines but today has been the best sleep she's had bevause everything was starting to disturb her downstairs. What does he sleept in downstairs? I tend to get dd ready for bed and put her in her sleeping bag and then lay her down on the sofa next to us when she starts looking aleepy and she gwnerally does stay asleep. Then varry her up when we go up. But from now on I think I will put her up with a monitor

@MrsTerryPratcett You’re right, he is a great sleeper but some of my NCT group have babies doing 7 hours every night which makes me question my instincts a bit!
@Charlottejade89 We’ve tried him sleeping in his pram carry cot and sleepy head but he’s not keen on either (though will sleep in them on a walk/upstairs...) He’s ok in his bouncy chair but not great. He will sleep on DH but it’s a bit restrictive and isn’t going to work when he goes back to his job in January (he’s been off on SPL). I’ve honestly not thought I’d just laying him on the sofa, it’s worth a try!

Just don't do a bedtime routine til a bit later, it honestly won't make any difference.

Yeah anywhere down stairs he'd sleep then up to bed with us at any time past 10 ish. We weren't home a huge amount before 6 months so he never had a settled sleep pattern but it generally worked. Sofa, blanket on the rug, arms, etc

DD (23 weeks) has gone to bed in the bedroom since 8 weeks at around 7pm. No way would she have slept in the room with us with the TV on etc.

This gets asked all the time and for reasons I don't fully understand the threads go one of two ways:

1. everyone shouts at the very idea that anyone would break the SIDS guidelines and makes the OP feel bad for asking and says that their baby didn't have a bedtime until they were at school
2. everyone says that their baby had a bedtime when still in the hospital and mocks the very idea that anyone wouldn't have a bedtime routine for a newborn

I have no idea why they end up so polarised. Everyone I know in real life - including me - has started putting the baby up to bed before they come up in the evenings at about 3-4 months, and so not followed that part of the guidelines to the letter. DS is five months and sleeps without us from about 7.30-10.30 (when we go to bed) and also isn't always in the same room as us for naps. This works for us, but I do completely understand why other families would choose to do things differently. DS would be a nightmare if we tried to make him sleep in the living room all evening and I'm not prepared to go sit in a dark room for three hours every night. Other people have babies who need resettling constantly in the evening and so keeping them downstairs is the practical choice. Other people are willing to make bigger sacrifices than me to follow the guidelines exactly. Each baby and family is different.

Don't put him on the sofa! Putting a baby to sleep on a surface as soft as a sofa is much riskier than allowing them to sleep alone in a safe bed!

We have to put our baby upstairs for naps and for bed time. She’s 15 weeks. Too alert to sleep downstairs with us in the day - she just won’t sleep if it’s light and people are around! She has to sleep for 7 too and same thing - poor girls exhausted if we don’t let her sleep upstairs. We’re happy with our choice and watch her on the monitor - just do what works for you and what your comfortable with.

*sleep for 7pm at night

Fully agree with @LisaSimpsonsbff my baby would be a nightmare in the evenings If we kept her with us (tried it) and I’m not willing to sit in a dark room upstairs with her (also tried it...considering she naps every 1.5h at the most I was going insain)