Starting nursery and illness

[LGRose]

Hi everyone

Just looking for some reassurance from people and to know that things improve.

My son is 10 months old and has been doing 3 days a week at nursery for about a month and a half now I'm back at work. We are now on the second tummy bug he has picked up there, it's going through he whole family making for a great first Christmas!

I'm just hoping a few people could comment and let me know any ways you coped with the onslaught of illness that seems to come with starting nursery? Anything you did to cope with these new illnesses? Hope did you balance that with trying to manage your return to work and all the stuff that comes along with tha6- mentally and physically.

So just after a bit of solidarity really! It's a tough time for us all, particularly my lovely little one of course.

I'm not sure I can help but would I'd like to lurk to see what others say and offer you some solidarity.

DD started nursery mid-October and we're still enduring one lurgy after another. DD has had:

A normal cold
Norovirus
Chest infection
Mystery viral rash with fever
Hand foot and mouth
Bad cold lasting weeks on end
Ear infection

And right now we're both recovering from flu. DD is on day 7 and still a long way to go.

She's now lighter than she was 3 months ago.

Financially it's been a disaster for me. I'm single and self employed and I've caught a lot of these lurgies as well so between the two of us there haven't been many days where we've both been well and DD's gone to nursery and I've actually worked.

If this goes on much longer I'll seriously have to rethink. Not only has my work suffered (I was getting more done before DD started nursery) but our social life has been completely obliterated so the last 2.5 months have been miserable.

Hi Both,

I know it's really tough. My DD started nursery in September, she's now 16 months and @INeedNewShoes I was looking down your list thinking, yes, yes in fact the only the only thing we've avoided is hand, foot and mouth so far. Oh yes we got a viral rash with the first major cold.

I work for a global company 3 days a week and luckily can work from home remotely, but am expected in the office on my 3 days normally. I've had to miss meetings in person, it's hard and speak to my manager about how better we can try and make it work. I haven't yet missed a days work as I've muddled through the day with a sick child and help from my partner who works remotely full time, but it's not ideal.

To be honest nothing prepares you for all the sickness and I was careful on mat leave with avoiding sick children which meant my mat leave was enjoyable, but was wondering if that was the best thing to do as she was so poorly initially when she started nursery. She has another cold, but overall is coping much better and I think her immune system is starting to kick in we are 3 months in now. The nursery said she will have bouts of sickness and times were they are well. Apparently by the time they start school they have a great immune system compared to children who don't attend a nursery setting - who knows? We'll have to see on that one 😂

But yes it's hard hey, on her days she was sick she would sleep with us and I would have a sippy cup of water that I would offer her throughout the night, as she had some high temperatures that calpol was not touching. We stocked the medicine cupboard with everything for babies, including nasal drops, I could pop onto her bib or a muslin and she could breath it in to help clear her sinuses. There is basically not a lot you can give them, just keep them hydrated is the main thing. It will get better probably like me at 3 months .. happy Christmas ladies, hope the sickness isn't too bad today xx

I completely understand op.

I returned to work in September and put my son in a local nursery. He immediately picked up a bug and whilst unwell he was waking every hour , he eventually needed antibiotics. He's not the best sleeper anyway with 4 night wakings being normal.

At the end if that month I was broken (my husband couldn't do night wakings as he's a shift worker) and after nursery fees and a miserable month I looked at our finances. We were only about £200 better off as a family since my return to work. I handed in my notice with a view to returning to work when he's older.

It's bloody hard but in our situation it was easier for us all to make spending cuts than carry on as we were.

Eurgh I completely relate to your post. When my DD started nursery she picked up something every single week for about 3 months. You could set your clock by it, every single Friday she'd start. We were starting to wonder whether to pull her out.

It was that consistent I mentioned it to the doctor at an unrelated appointment as I was worried about her being ill constantly and she said the babies that pick things up so much at this age are very rarely ill as they get older.

I'm already starting to notice that my DD is ill much less frequently than her peers now. So hang in there

Oh thank you all so much for taking the time to reply especially at Christmas.

It's just been so hard with this illness in particular hitting all of us, you start to wonder how you'll cope!

But we will hang on in there and look forward to the time when it isn't quite so bad!

I hope you all have lovely Christmas days x

It does get better OP - but unfortunately they tend to get literally EVERYTHING at the start.

All children have to go through this at some point. Either as babies when mums return to work, or when they start school/preschool. My DD is nearly 4, and i had been congratulating myself on how little she was unwell, and then she started preschool in September So much illness!

We're going through the same thing as well. DD 13 months started in September and it's been one thing after the other for her, me and DH. As I understand it, it's inevitable that they will get everything and anything during the first winter at nursery

It's sole destroying, I contemplated giving up work at one point which is quite something as I'm not cut out to be a stay at home mum. My daughter started nursery at 10 months old in the September, when I went back to work full time. I had5 months where I don't think she or I did a full week. Oddly enough no D&V from nursery (in fact never as she's started school now) but twice acquired norovirus whilst on the children's ward. We had ridiculous fevers, mystery rashes, viral illnesses, chest infections and bronchiolitis, as well as chicken pox, hand foot and mouth, etc.

I coped with a lot of good will from work, support from in laws who would have DD some days so I could work, making up time working on an evening...and grinning and baring it.

It really does get better but not for a few months. Keep going, look after yourself too. If it's any consolation my second who's 3 and started nursery at the same age barely even gets a sniffle and has had a couple of days off nursery since he started...I put it down to being exposed to all the bugs from his sister or from me when I was pregnant

Oh it's so difficult, DS2 was a nightmare, I swear he was off more than he was there the first 3 months. All I can say is it ends, and it's doing his health the world of good in the long run. GP told me it builds their immune systems and lessons their chances of all sorts of things even certain types of leukaemia. I can't remember when it stopped, but it gradually reduces and I think I could count on one hand how many times he was off aged 3-4, he's just done his first term at school with 100% attendance. Sorry not much help but it WILL get better!!

Also no advice but solidarity here- DS has been at nursery 3 days a week for a couple of months now and staff have literally never seen him well- colds, coughs, chest infections, sinusitis and norovirus all back-to-back and there's high levels of foot and mouth going around his nursery at the moment so I expect that'll be waiting for us in January! 🤦🏻‍♀️ It is relentless and horrible seeing them poorly (and catching everything myself isn't fun too). Fingers crossed it starts to even out eventually for all of us!

You just have to power through it. My son was with my parents until he was 2 then started nursery. He caught EVERYTHING! I was lucky as I was part time so although I caught it all too we were usually at home ill together!

However, he started school in September and has only had one sick day so it does get better. He's much more robust than the ones who stayed at home until 3. After the first year I found we both caught a lot less. Have a lovely day today. As much as you can with sickness anyway!

Yes, this happened to us. DS is 20 months and started nursery at 12 months. It was one thing after another and went on for the first 6 months. It's v hard. It has recently got better.

It’s completely normal. And frankly better that they get it out of the way now. My first was sick pretty much from November to May every year. I always sent her in though unless she had a fever or d&v and we just got on with it. You can’t miss work for a cold. I found that lots of vitamin c (oranges) for her and high doses of vitamin c, zinc and echinacea for me made a huge difference. It got better every year after that.

She’s in Year 1 now and hasn’t missed a day of school for sickness yet in the past 2 years. The kids who didn’t go to nursery are always sick, so I imagine ultimately it must be a good thing for their immune systems!

I'm sure this won't help but my children were so robust until they started nursery. It seems to never end in our house!

It's killing me financially. The amount of time me and my DH have had to take off work is unbelievable and we still haven't had the dreaded hand foot and mouth or chicken pox! They've only been there since May.

@ItsClemFandangoCanYouHearMe you're still in the early days, you'd expect a child to be robust before being in nursery etc, it'll get better, with winter it'll probably get worse before it's better but hopefully by spring/summer it'll get better for you!

I definitely wasn't prepared for quite how bad it would be.

Keep trying to remind myself of all you say, it will get better and is good for him in th3 long run...even if it doesn't feel like it today!

@LGRose I know and agree you aren't really prepared. I now have utter respect for all working mums and non- working mums, that I had never really appreciated before I had my little one. I think at one point you just feel like you are doing everything badly. Letting work down, letting your little one down as you are trying to look after them and work in my case, it's just difficult, and isn't helped by nursery only allowing fixed days and not being able to swap unless you pay. Having said that my nursery is fabulous so it's just something I've come to terms with.

That so speaks to me. You feel like you can't be 100% at any one thing now- mum or work.

We are all doing our with what ever circumstances we have I'm sure though

Both of mine were constantly ill for the first 6 months at nursery. DH and I both work from home so somehow muddled through with working half days, taking annual leave and if all else failed phoning in sick ourselves. It does get better I promise, but it is bloody hard while you’re going through it!