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Parenting

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Original poster

8/9 year age gap

11 replies

Babbabump · 22/12/2018 17:05

Ooh I've just joined and this is my third post - I'm on fire!!

The age gap between my children will be 8/9 years when baby 2 is born. Id really love to hear of experiences of similar age gaps? I'm already sick of the 'oh that's a big age gap' comments- I cant be the only one, surely?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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Desmondo2016 · 22/12/2018 17:06

My age gap is 12 years although I had older ones too. I got all the comments too! Fair enough, it is a big age gap! No harm meant.

Original poster

Babbabump · 22/12/2018 17:08

This is true, I guess Im a bit sensitive about it. Are your children close, did they still play together? Thank you

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youlemming · 22/12/2018 23:14

I have a sister 2 yrs older and one 11 yrs younger and I get on so much better with the younger one.
I think it is due to not fighting for the same level of attention and being able to help my mum when my sister was a baby, I've seen her grow up really.
She loved having an older sister, someone who would come take her for days out once I left home, and more recently asking advice when she had her baby knowing she could ask anything even if it sounded silly.

I have a 5yr gap between my 2 girls and found it a lot easier to deal with the new born stage knowing DD1 could entertain herself when needed and she loved to help out by getting things for me during feeding or changing.
Bigger gaps don't suit everyone but it was perfect for me, if we have a 3rd it will be another 5yr gap.

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MrsM36 · 23/12/2018 08:23

I've got 3 children who are 13, 10 & 12weeks & yes it is a big age gap but can honestly say that so far on the whole it has been much easier than when I had DD2 and DD1 was 2yrs & 10mths. Both of my older girls dote on their little sister and are more than happy to keep her entertained/feed her a bottle etc whilst I cook their tea or iron their school uniform etc. It did take a little bit of time for DD2 to adjust to not being the youngest any more & she struggled a bit as she wasn't as confident with DD3 as her older sister was to start with. However now that DD3 is smiling and responding more to her (& is not quite so newborn like) she is much happier and is relishing her role as a big sister... her favourite thing is pushing the pram home from school 🙂. From my point of view I think the hardest thing has been going back to nights of broken sleep but even that is hasn't been too bad as DD3 has been fairly obliging and at 12 weeks is now consistently sleeping 9:30/10pm - 6/6:30am, waking for a feed and then back down til 8/8:30am so I haven't had too long of broken nights (she say with her fingers firmly crossed).

MaidenMotherCrone · 23/12/2018 08:28

There are 8 years between my sister and I, she is my person and I am hers. We are 50 and 58. Slightly different though as we have 4 other siblings older and younger than us.
DH has an 11 year gap between him and his brother. He says it’s the reason he decided not to have children..... put him off completely.

MessyBun247 · 23/12/2018 08:31

It’s always more about personalities than age gaps. Big age gaps can get on brilliantly and tiny gaps can hate each other, and vice versa obviously.

Thankssomuch · 23/12/2018 08:33

I have a sixteen year age gap between my first and second. Never thought I’d be lucky enough to have another child and its been wonderful. They are very sweet together!

AJPTaylor · 23/12/2018 08:41

My oldest were 10 and 13 when dd3 came along. They are now 23,21 and 11.
When dd3 was preschool she was basically the family pet. I did worry that without siblings close in age she wouldn't learn to fight her corner, but she is fine.
Having a small one was helpful through the grim teen years. It reminded you why you bothered in the first place!
Dd3 Did find it hard when dd1 went off to uni. And was the only one at home before she was 10. But that has advantages too. She is pretty self sufficient and confident. And coming into her own teen years has 2 big sisters on her side and prob able to give her more up to date advice than me!

abcriskringle · 23/12/2018 08:58

My cousins were born 7 years apart and get on well, my mum and aunt were also 7 years and are very good friends, my brother and I are 11 years apart and it was never an issue. In fact, I am the first to buck the trend by ttc #2 when #1 is 18 months old (my family think I'm mad!).

Original poster

Babbabump · 23/12/2018 20:09

I've really enjoyed reading these. Thank you 😍😍😍

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Ourmaud · 23/12/2018 21:56

My kids age gap is 15 years and honestly I’m so happy I did it this way. Mine both adore each other and both get quality time as their needs aren’t competing for my time

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