Has anyone considered a private school for DC, but it's meant that you had only one child?

[loveautum]

Hi all,

My little one is 16 months as of next year after she is 2 we are moving her to a new nursery of which when she's 4 she will go straight into the school. It's a wonderful school in the countryside where we live, but most importantly the local schools are not particularly great, so it was the big factor in making our decision.

The school is something we can afford as we both work, but my point is to this post given we'll be paying for her education till she's 18 and probably beyond if she goes to Uni, we couldn't really afford to put 2 children through, well maybe at a stretch and if I returned to full time work, currently do 3 days, but I'm really thinking of only having 1 child, giving them a great start. Has anyone else stopped at 1 because of sending DC into private education? Feeling a tad bit guilty of not giving them a sibling also, plus I'm now 40 so don't have long anyway if we wanted to try for no.2.

Not for the school reason, but we are only having one to ensure the best start possible.

We will be fortunate enough to be able to gift our little one a house, when they are old enough, but if we had two, it would need to be sold and split and who knows what deposits will be like in the future!

Yes my friend has done this. It's absolutely about personal preference and there is no right or wrong.

I've also got friends who have decided not to have children at all and last Saturday night posted pictures of themselves drinking champagne cocktails in a London hotel on Facebook whilst I was drinking lemonade in a social club at my DD's gymnastics presentation and party night. They go on three or four amazing holidays a year and can do what they want all of the time,

I love my sister and I think that this had some part to play in deciding that I wanted more than one child.

If she’s only 16 months old how do you know it’s the best school for her?

Sounds like a sensible plan to me. If you are 40 now, no guarantee that sibling will appear anyway. Just crack on and enjoy her and your life. It sounds great.

And I wouldn't actually indulge irl about conversations about your decision or reasons why. Just "life for us is perfect with one, so lucky to have her".

Yes, we have decided to only have one, so that we can privately educate her (if we do choose at the time) and we'll be in a position to provide a house deposit at least.

I would.

I wouldn't chose to send my dd to private primary school but definutely secondary school and that will mean we only have 1 child.

To be fair i've only ever wanted 1 anyway

I think it sounds perfectly reasonable. We only have the 1 together and that's perfect for us. We are still undecided on wether to go down the private school route but its good to know we can finance it if we choose that option. We couldn't guarantee that if we went on to have another ( although I don't want another anyway )
I think it's a decision only you can make, but I completely understand your thinking.

Our son is also 16 months and it's scary that It's not far off that these decision have to be made to ensure a place 😥😥😥

I would in a heartbeat. She will, if you choose well, have a much nicer quality of life.

@AJPTaylor yes you are completely right about not needing to explain. When people talk about schools I never mention that we are planning to send her to a private school and just leave it there.

I know it's not really necessary to put them through at primary stage, but the school is fantastic and she would benefit from the start plus the primary school's are pretty average to say the least, so we might as well just start as we mean to go on. I think it's sad when I hear about some local schools having fundraising days to raise money for simple necessities, however that's for another thread. We also live pretty rural and the school has so many great facilities.

Is the private school financially stable - decent pupil numbers in every year group? If not, your money might be better spent moving house somewhere in catchment for better state schools.

@bourbonbiccy thanks for your note, I know, I left the nursery side a bit late when on maternity leave and nearly didn't make it into the nursery I wanted, so I decided to organise the school for next year and not leave it late, in case I missed the intake.

Its a day school with some international boarders so a nice mix and diverse which I was pleased about, many parents likes ourselves who just have standard jobs. She's not 2 until the end of Aug.

@Loopytiles yes my partner was really hot the financial aspect and checked the school out as well as other private schools we considered. Also the school is well regarded locally.

Dd is at Private School and there is an about equal average number of only children I would say but whether people only had 1 child so that they could afford Private School or whether they can afford Private School because they only had 1 child for other reasons I don’t know.
There are a few families with 3 or more children though as well
( we also have DS and it why dd wasn’t at Private Primary)

We are probably stopping at one as we can afford private school for one but not for two. We aren’t overly impressed with any of the local schools so we would need to move if we were going down the state route. We love our home so would be reluctant to do that.

It’s a bit depressing making such an important decision based on finances but education is really important to us and we waited a long time to have a baby so we could offer them the best possible start.

Other friends who are stopping at one are also considering private school so I hope if we do go down that route there will be other only children for them to bond with!

Our DS is 2 at the start of August so need to get looking. He hasn't been in a nursery yet as I am still at home with him. But I do think if we go private I would like one with a good mix with people with "normal " jobs and incomes.

Loopytiles I had not considered checking for that in my research. A great piece of advice to take on board thank you

I know it's not really necessary to put them through at primary stage

Most of the private secondary schools local to me have their own primary / prep schools feeding into the secondary school bit. From what I’ve heard, it’s generally easier to get a child into the secondary school if they’re coming from the feeder primary. Although the more selective schools can also be quite ruthless about getting rid of primary aged children who aren’t achieving the desired standards.