Anyone else have a 3.5 year old that don't sleep???

[Tinks15]

Its flipping draining, its been like this since the day she was born she has NEVER slept through the night. Wakes numerous times until she is in our bed (yes i know should never of started it when she was months old) even then she still wakes frequently.

Luckily DD2 who is 4 months sleeps through at the moment. That could all change though.
I just literally dont know what to do anymore with DD1!

Please don't beat yourself up! Some children don't sleep through and need that adult comfort. So many adults find it hard to sleep alone - it's not surprising that children do too.

Nope but I have a 5.5 year old that doesn't. Honestly I've come to the realisation it's nothing you have done and some kids just aren't good sleepers. There are sleep consultants that some people swear by so you could try something like that.

Thanks both. Its got worse the past few months, some nights her first wake up is as early as 9pm! She then cries & cries but we both refuse to go up to bed at this time to get her in our bed (as it seems she wants us as comfort), so then one of us is having to sit at the bottom of the stairs until she goes back off after going up to her about 50 times trying to reason with her/calm her down etc. No bribery works or anything.
We are literally having no evening its becoming a joke.
I have thought about a sleep consultant in the past but I'm unsure what it would entail? Is it costly?

DC2 eventually started sleeping through consistently at about 4. Even now (age 6) if he wakes (rarely) in the night he gets into our bed. He also now sleeps in his older siblings' room - bunk beds (despite having a perfectly good room of his own). He just seems to need that comfort.

DC3 is also a nightmare age 2. We have abandoned her cot and have got her a double bed which at least gives us comfort when she wakes (usually at midnight). I know we sound totally soft and hippyish but we're really not, I just think they'll both get it eventually.

FWIW DC1 is and always has been, from 6 months, an excellent sleeper. 7-7 baby. Probably why we had 2 more

No harm in looking into a sleep consultant though. I just think we're too tired to do the initial follow through. Hopeless I know

My one doesn’t sleep through at age almost 3. I don’t think you did anything wrong, I think different children have their different ‘things ‘.
Would a slightly later bed time help? Or slightly earlier? Good luck.

Thats the thing i dont know if we even have the energy to follow a plan through with the help of a sleep consultant.
Its just bloody draining with her being such a rubbish sleeper you can't even reason with her when she wakes she takes no notice of what you are saying she just cries & cries. Shes only been in bed 2 hours & she's woken already. It never used to be this bad. I'm glad lots of other people are in the same boat though that makes me feel a little better. Thanks all

Yep me 🙋 unfortunately no advice to offer as we've tried EVERYTHING and she still in our bed most nights. Hard bloody work and a good job she is cute 😂😂

We have one. We have just got some respite as we came up with the brilliant plan of putting his siblings in with him. They take turns. It helps a very big lot.

They are older, but sooner your dc2 will be old enough - - to be a sacrificial lamb--

My 3.5 year old is a rotter too. We co-sleep now as the night terrors were too awful and very disturbing. She sleeps through if she's with an adult.

We did try and tackle it with a sleep consultant over the summer. Initially it worked (after a week of screaming) but we unfortunately slipped back into old habits on the occasions she did wake up. You do need commitment!

DC2 isn't a great sleeper either. We're exhausted!

I'm lucky enough for DD2 to be a good sleeper at the moment i hope it stays that way albeit the odd night obviously.
I wish i could say DD's sleep improves when she is in with us but it doesn't, well very rarely she will sleep through once she's in with us.
I just cannot let her get in our bed any earlier than 11pm as we don't go up to bed until that time anyway.
Partner is currently sitting at the bottom of the stairs listening to her shouting out & crying whilst i am feeding DD2.
Oh how our Saturday nights are nowadays .

Dd didn’t sleep through the night once until she was about 4, it was exhausting & you have my sympathy. I found something that helped her calm down ( although not sleep) was having an audio book playing in her room. We would do normal bedtime routine with bath book etc and then put her to bed listening to a story. It didn’t give her much more sleep but it did at least give us time to have dinner, I think it also got her used to being in bed without us there.
She’s a teenager now & I need a rocket to get her out of bloody bed!

What would happen if you just left her to cry it out and not engage in her tantrums? Develop a decent routine, explain what’s going to happen. “We’re going to have our tea, then we’re going to have a nice bath, and you can choose your favorite story for us to read together. You’re such a good girl, and you’re getting so big. Santa is going to be so pleased with you, sleeping in your own bed. And in the morning, mummy will come get you. We will stick a sticker on your chart for being such a great girl staying in your bed all night.” If you keep giving in to her she will never know any different

Easier said than done Fab she'd cry & scream for hours if i let her & the state she'd get herself into i'm not prepared to do that. Believe me we've tried everything, the whole Father Christmas thing doesn't make one bit of differencr either.

This is what I imagine my 1yo will be like in a few years!

Have you tried a floor bed in her room? You would lie with her until she falls asleep then leave, and go back to her room to lie with her for a bit whenever she wakes up. Not sure if she'll accept it but worth a shot maybe...