Ex Bf Drama - AIBU

[MamaofOne94]

A bit of backstory here, just a teensy smidgen

My ex left me when I was 36 weeks pregnant for the Woman he cheated on me with. He told me that he wanted nothing to do with my Son even though he'd seemed interested although I am now seeing that it was a ploy to keep me calm while I was so heavily pregnant. I said fine because I knew I'd dodged a major bullet. I don't want my Son to grow up and cheat on women so I showed my ex where the door was and let it hit him in the back as he walked through

I met my current boyfriend just after I'd given birth through a mutual friend. We hit it off but agreed that we'd just be friends because I was a new Mum and my crazy self was absolutely mad.

We have been together for just over eighteen months and my Son has started calling my new boyfriend "Dada" He's been the only real male in my little boy's life and I'm completely fine with this happening. But my ex is now suddenly cropping up from whatever hole he came from claiming my son is his and he should be called Daddy.

AIBU to tell my ex to do one - He's had zero contact and wanted nothing to do with my son until recently (Past few months) I only think he's come crawling back because Miss. Airhead blonde bimbo has chucked him for someone else

What a horrible little weasel. I would let him take you to court for access. I have no doubt he’d get access but the judge won’t insist Ds call him dada. He may not bother with access, but I wouldn’t be giving him access without a court order.

"Horrible Little Weasel" is too good for my Ex. He won't bother with access because I've tried that before, I've bent over backwards for almost two years just to get him to come to see DS, even if it's just once

Difficult one. Maybe he’s realised what he’s done and wants to change? In your situation I would be feeling the same as you. I’d want him to bugger off forever but maybe he’s genuine? Can you give him supervised contact? I wouldn’t want him being called daddy though. He’s not been a dad. Maybe in time...

I have never had my dad around. My mum always told me it was him who wanted little contact, but as I’ve reached adulthood I have learnt he tried to see me in my childhood but my mum refused. Knowing my mum know I can imagine her doing this (different scenario for you as your ex genuinely chose not to be in yours sons life). I get really confused by how I feel about my real dad. I understand my mum was hurt from what he did and didn’t want him coming in and out of my life but did he want to see me? Why didn’t he fight to see me? 😩

My own son has two daddies. His biological daddy, who he sees a few hours a week and his daddy James - my partner who has been in his life since he was 18 months who truthfully is more of a father than my ex and does all the daily daddy duties!

Not much help but I wish you the best of luck!

JKCR2017

Supervised contact might work. My exes Mum is coming around to drop off presents and make sure I have enough food, I'll text her and see if my ex will come too, but knowing him - He'll say No.

Thank you for taking time to answer my rant. I must seem like such a baby but this has really made me angry x

You don’t sound like a baby and you’re totally right to feel angry. I would be too. Like I said, my son has two daddies, me and his dad split when I was pregnant. Although he’s always been in his life it’s always been a bit hit and miss, letting him down, he would speak to me like a piece of crap. He would let him down when he had a new girlfriend etc. So I somewhat understand how you feel.

It’s great that your ex’s mum does this btw!!