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Original poster

Why have rules and regulations in regards to babies changed so much?

70 replies

majidmania · 06/12/2018 22:23

I was talking to my mum today who gave me an insight on how we were brought up.

  • Formula was okay to give back then
  • midwives used to help you bathe the baby in hospital (no one showed me or cared what I was doing)
  • she used to only have one bottle that she had to wash every time, in time for the next feed
  • there was no kettle then so used to have to boil the water and the baby just had to wait
  • if the baby threw up, the clothes were left on as you didn’t have the luxury of having loads of clothes to change into
  • we slept in the same bed as my parents, Moses baskets were a luxury
  • there was mould and leaks and all sorts back then in the house and in the bedroom
  • we got weaned at 3 months

We all turned okay. Got abit of eczema and that’s it.

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TheWanderlust · 07/12/2018 07:26

I think there was just different parenting styles. I was born in the early 90's and had the same discussion with my mum last night. As said above, we are far more set up for a convenient life now. The only things that appears remotely similar is the use of Muslin cloths 😂

Before anyone claims we lived in poverty we absolutely didn't. I had 2 working parents (mum was a teacher) and they owned their house.

  • Bottle fed as my mum had to go back to work when I was 16 weeks old to pay the mortgage.
  • No specific steriliser - Milton in a sink of cold water overnight.
  • No Moses basket - I went in a cot/ in bed with parents from day 1.
  • Never had a baby monitor; she claims my cries were loud enough to wake the street 🙈
  • All clothes were second hand from cousins and my Nan knitted my blankets.
gamerwidow · 07/12/2018 07:31

Formula feeding still ok and the majority still do it.
I had DD 8 years ago and was shown how to bath her by the midwife in hospital, probably because I was in hospital for 3 days after a CS. No need to bath the baby if your in and out on the same day.
Milton liquid was used to sterilise rather than steam but it’s exactly the same idea.
No one with a baby with reflux changes their baby after every sick unless you have 10 changes of clothes available each day.
My house has mould from condensation noone has tried to take DD away because of it
We used a Moses basket that has been used for children in the family for the last 28 years.

missclimpson · 07/12/2018 07:34

I had my babies in the seventies. We had restraints for the carry cot and then fitted car seats (had to be fitted by the garage). We had a sterilizer for bottles (Milton), washing machine and central heating. The children had clean clothes every day. We had a crib and then a cot, a big pram and then a folding pushchair. Most of these were passed on by other family members, but we bought new mattresses.
I do find these generalisations about the past annoying, especially "we know so much more now". We were guilty of that too, of course, and thought we did it all much better than our parents. My children are in their forties and seem to have done pretty well to me. I think the long-term outcomes of parenting are the importsnt bit!

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Ilovealexa · 07/12/2018 07:38

Ridiculous post

People also didn’t used to know how bad smoking was for them (not talking about in pregnancy) and some were fine. Many also aren’t/weren’t.

Stupid.

Childrenofthesun · 07/12/2018 07:39

I was born in the 70s - was bf for a bit then formula fed. Mum had lots of bottles because she used to make them up then store them in the fridge. Bottles were sterilised using Milton's fluid. I actually got a cold water steriliser when DD1 was born 10 years ago because I found the electric steriliser more hassle.

I was very soon sicky (probably KY reflux, which wasn't diagnosed then) and Mum did change my clothes. We were prbablyt "lower-middle class" but Mum had clothes and a washing machine.

I was given my first solids (baby rice) aged 3 weeks!! This was on the recommendation of the health visitor because I wasn't keeping the milk down. No known adverse effects....

Childrenofthesun · 07/12/2018 07:41

To add, the thing that surprised my Mum most when I had my DC was the lack of contact from Health Visitors. She had a daily visit and said the health visitor was what kept her going.

DobbinsVeil · 07/12/2018 07:42

I was born in 1977. My mum said there was a huge pressure on breastfeeding then (and in 1974 with my brother). My brother didn't gain weight well and she had to weigh him after each feed then top him up with carnation? milk. Eventually moved on to FF with him, I was bf for a year as I wouldn't take a bottle.

She had a c-section for both of us and was in for a min of 10 days. She was shocked I was discharged after 24hrs with my EMCS with DS2. She had to have a general with me, and when she came to she asked what she'd had. MW said, "I think a boy". Not so!

Blacktoffeecat · 07/12/2018 07:42

Formula is Ok to give now Hmm
We have DS his first bath in hospital with a MW helping. He’s 6.

Blacktoffeecat · 07/12/2018 07:42

gave

SoyDora · 07/12/2018 07:44

We were discharged within 6 hours with both DC so no need for a bath in hospital.
Also, it’s advised not to get the cord stump wet, hence the advice not to bath straight away.

olivertwistwantsmore · 07/12/2018 07:47

You were brought up in the 80s, OP? Your post sounded as if you were brought up in the 50s!

Formula was okay to give back then

It's still OK now... It's much more common than bfing.

  • midwives used to help you bathe the baby in hospital (no one showed me or cared what I was doing)

Ours did in 2000

  • we got weaned at 3 months

Guidelines change.

The other items sound much more like your family's circumstances, not a general thing. I can't imagine a family not having a spare set of clothes for a baby, for example.

Cachailleacha · 07/12/2018 07:47

I bathed my baby (now 12yo) before I went home, stayed two nights.

NonaGrey · 07/12/2018 07:48

I’m not sure why you are surprised that things have changed regarding childcare since the 1980s (although I don’t recognise much from your list) how many things from any area of life have stayed static?

Science, medicine, technology, industry, the legal system, the financial system, how we eat, dress and shop are all considerably different than they were 35 years ago.

Why would childcare be any different?

BobDobbs · 07/12/2018 07:49

I think most of those differences are just about parenting style. I was born in the 70s and slept in a cot whereas my dc mostly slept in my bed.

BobDobbs · 07/12/2018 07:51

Also in the 80s before the Internet I guess people were more likely to get their parenting advice from their mum / midwife. So practices may have varied quite a lot.

LaPufalina · 07/12/2018 07:59

I remember my mum being in for at least five days after having a planned CS with my sister in the 80s, I was hustled out of my bay before 24 hours had passed after my ELCS a few months ago because they needed the space for someone else. I managed at least 29 hours with my first section Grin
I think it's interesting how these things have changed.

missclimpson · 07/12/2018 08:00

We had books too BobDobbs. My mother and MiL were both from the Truby King school and had very strict ideas about routine. We certainly didn't follow all their advice and they didn't live near us anyway. Every generation has its gurus.
I think in part child-rearing practices change with the available technology - potty-training / washing machines / disposable nappies would be an example of this.
Sadly there are examples of poor practices in every generation, often dictated by poverty, housing conditions etc.

Bouchie · 07/12/2018 08:02

tbh the guidelines changed loads between my kids as there is a 15 year gap between oldest and youngest. Particularly around allergies esp wheat. I was told to wean after 16 weeks, then after 6 months and then a study came out saying exposure to wheat before six months may reduce wheat intolerance!

Chardeemacdennis1 · 07/12/2018 08:02

I'm an 80s baby.

I had a cot in my own room, no co sleeping.
Mum used terry cloth nappies.
Bottles were sterilised in boiling water.
Lots of clothes were knitted by relatives.
In many a photo I'm chewing actual car keys.
Weaned at 4 months.

I heard eczema can be linked back to maternal diet and bathing in soap too early.
Weaning gidence has gone back to 4 months if the baby is ready. A friend was told to wean at 4 months to stop allergies as she is nut allergic.

New one I heard also is only feed from one boob per meal time.

JustWingingLifeAsUsual · 07/12/2018 10:06

Tea is the biggest bother. We cannot give tea to babies! Well my toddler has tea every morning with me and he is fine! His teeth are fine... far better than drinking fruit juices that can potentially rot them! I drank tea like there was no tomorrow when I was a baby - I remember my mum used to put in a bottle for me! I loved it then and I love it now (in a cup though lol).

SoyDora · 07/12/2018 10:29

Never heard of tea being a ‘bother’. My DC haven’t had it because I can’t stand the stuff, but I know plenty of toddlers who have a cup of weak tea.
I don’t know why you’d give a baby/toddler tea (mine drink water and milk) but that’s probably because I don’t drink it myself so don’t get the whole tea obsession!

NonaGrey · 07/12/2018 11:25

Justwinging the caffeine in tea and coffee can reduce iron absorption from the food we eat.

There are concerns that drinking tea/coffee leads to iron deficiency in children.

It’s nothing to do with impact on their teeth.

VictoryOrValhalla · 07/12/2018 11:32

Formula was okay to give back then

Formula is still okay to give. That’s not a rule or regulation.

midwives used to help you bathe the baby in hospital (no one showed me or cared what I was doing)

Midwives are massively overstretched. They don’t have time to teach people how to bath babies, they have to focus on keeping them alive.

Again, not a rule or regulation.

she used to only have one bottle that she had to wash every time, in time for the next feed

Nothing stopping you having only one bottle. Not a rule or regulation.

there was no kettle then so used to have to boil the water and the baby just had to wait

Not a rule or regulation.

if the baby threw up, the clothes were left on as you didn’t have the luxury of having loads of clothes to change into

Not a rule or regulation. Many people don’t change their baby every time they throw up.

we slept in the same bed as my parents, Moses baskets were a luxury

Lots of babies co-sleep today. Not a rule or regulation.

there was mould and leaks and all sorts back then in the house and in the bedroom

Lots of babies still living in mouldy houses. Not a rule or regulation.

we got weaned at 3 months

Many still do. Not a rule or regulation. Weaning guidelines are... guidelines.

Original poster
majidmania · 07/12/2018 11:44

I got sepsis in hospital, has to deliver my baby by forceps and was on antibiotics.

Midwives did not show me how to do anything except for trying to force my baby on my breast, even though he was probably still in pain from being delivered from forceps and ended up being tongue tied too.

I had no help whatsoever.

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majidmania · 07/12/2018 11:46

Sorry, I know formula is okay. I formula feed due to the above.

However the midwives made out like there was a issue with formula in the week long stay in hospital so it seems to make me think it’s not okay, conditioned me I suppose.

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