Coats in car seats

[MamaOl]

I don’t currently drive, so my parents unfortunately drive me and my young son out if we ever need to go anywhere.
Now it’s winter, he has a coat, which has sparked a debate, and argument. I take his coat off in the car seat & they are now refusing to take us anywhere if I don’t do as they say and put a coat on him in car seat.

I’ve read everywhere it’s unsafe, asked other mums and they’ve said same thing. My mum’s now saying my son will get pneumonia if I don’t put him in a coat in the car. My anxiety is getting the better of me now.

Who is right?

You are definitely right, it is dangerous for children/babies to wear coats in the car. As pp's have said a fleece jacket and a blanket are good for the car.

It's worrying how your parents treat you though. "Refusing to take you anywhere in the car" and repeatedly undermining your choice as a parent is not good at all. My mum disagrees with some of my parenting choices but she never does more than gently suggest an option and if I don't agree then that's an end to it.

Your child your choice! Unless you are harming your child or putting them in danger then your parents have absolutely no right to go on at you.

Could you show them a video of a crash test with coat on? Or maybe get a health visitor or doctor or police to tell them? Sometimes, that generation need someone in authority to tell them that things have changed.

Christ that video

We didn't have car seats twenty odd years ago. I totally get where your coming from, some of the older generation believe us to be too over protective but testing is always evolving. Get a taxi, much safer and less stressful for you.

Coat off in the car. Blanket over him after he is strapped in if they are worried. Does the heating in their car not work?!

If he's in a car seat that is transferable, then you can get car seat wraps, which stay in the car seat and you wrap them in it before leaving the house.

If not, then you can still get the wrap for the car seat but you'll have to continue taking his coat off once at the car.

You've shown them everything you need to, I would just tell them you're the parent and your making a decision based on his safety and that's final

Also I would make the point that you and your sister were fine 20 years ago, because you never had any major accidents (I assume), but several children must've had accidents and the proof shows they were more at risk due to coata

Not to argue, but I wonder what people do in the countries where it is be -10, -20 in the long, long winter. There is no way you take your child out of the house and walk towards a car that is frozen without them being fully dressed. I have a 14 year old (who was born and raised in a Northern country) and a new baby here, and it never occurred to me not to have a child fully dressed for winter in the car seat. If you heat the car so that it is warm enough to be without winter clothes, everyone will need to undress. I just don't think it's workable for a place like Sweden, for instance, which takes road safety very seriously. I wonder if it is a British thing?
Or are these some kind of recent guidelines?

I don't understand why you can't just put a blanket over him? Could you arrange a visit to your health visitor, get them to back you up? The health visitor can also explain the bacteria causes pneumonia, not being cold.

My parents tried to argue with me that DDs car seat should go in the middle seat, despite the manual explaining that it shouldn't. I just ignored them.

If they won't listen to the advice then you either put your foot down and assert yourself as the parent or don't get in the car with them. That may make life more difficult but it is very dangerous to put a child in a car seat with a coat on.

@ceecee18 yes I have told them that what I would do is take my son to the car in his coat, take the coat off, place him in the car, and put a blanket over him. I have been then told it’s not acceptable and he will become seriously ill and catch pneumonia, to which I will be told by my mother “I told you so”

Carry on doing what you are doing. Every time your DS doesn't get pneumonia, tell her you told her so. See how long she can go before it drives her mad.

You can’t argue with stupid. Don’t go out in the car with them, get the bus, train or walk.

Goodness me no way would I let anyone put my baby in the car seat wearing a coat. It's so dangerous if there's an accident.

I'm not sure what will get though to them if the videos didn't. As pp said pneumonia isnt something you get from getting cold 🙈 But I have a feeling you might be talking to a brick wall with that one too. Can you think about other examples of things that people used to do (not wear seat belts, smoke everywhere indoors) that we now don't do because we know better...even if someone's Nan is a 60 a day smoker who is still going strong at 98, it doesn't mean we disregard that smoking has killed a massive amount of people.

I'd also say okay if you want to say I told you so if my child gets pneumonia from this situation then fine, I'll happily take that risk (as I don't believe it is a risk). But the coat is non negotiable. Plus as pp said there's a much more concerning risk of overheating with small babies. Febrile convulsions can be fine but they can also be very serious and cause all sorts of problems. Restraining a child in a car seat in a coat is a prime candidate for overheating.

Also look up morrck blankets and similar as they're great for transporting the whole seat warmly but still safe and can be easily opened up.or closed depending on the temperature.

I had a similar issue once but I was never in a million years going to be bullied into putting my child in a dangerous situation. If anyone tries to persuade you otherwise tell them your child's safety is non negotiable.

Sounds like most of the rest of us are taking their coats off and none of ours have pneumonia... tell your mum to warm the car up first if she's that bothered.

Huge safety issue! You're absolutely right to stand firm. Maybe you could show them the difference between strapping him in with a coat on and strapping him in without; I guarentee there will be a huge difference in length of seat straps, and that visual could go some way to showing them that he's just not safe in anything padded whilst in the car seat.

You and right. They are wrong. You need to stand your ground otherwise this will just be the first of many stupid things they force you to do.

Sorry your parents are being such idiots.