Can I get by without a double buggy for a 4.5 year old and a newborn?

[Tinkjon]

My daughter is 4.5 and I'm due with No.2 is September. As my daughter will be in school once the baby arrives, I don't think it's necessary to buy a double buggy - do you think I'm being unrealistic?! She is capable of walking everywhere, I only put her in the buggy to stop her from running off and grabbing everything when I'm trying to shop! (she's a nightmare when she's on the loose!) But she will be in school during the week and at weekends if we all go out somewhere, then my DH will be there to help with keeping tabs on DS. I've heard that buggy boards make it too hard to steer/push, so wasn't planning on getting one of those... so do you think that just one buggy is practical? Thanks in advance!

sorry Peachy

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Goodness me, some strong opinions there For the record, my DS does walk everywhere - she hates the buggy and walks for ages. All I do is strap her in when we get to somewhere where I need to concentrate on shopping and can't go chasing her every 20 seconds. I also take the buggy shopping with me so that I can carry stuff home in the basket. Wrist straps are a good idea, hadn't thought of those (we used the reins until they physically didn't fit her anymore!)

OK. When DS was 3 he stopped with the buggy. I had DD when DS was 4.2 and a double buggy didn't even occur to me - so on that basis I truly think you don't need one - and I do think a school child being in a buggy is ridiculous.
HOWEVER, is 3.4 and we now live over 2 km from school. I like to walk to school to drop DS off and pick him up. That would mean 8km a day for DD ... which is too much. So in the morning she goes in the buggy to school (so we can walk quickly) but in the afternoon she walks ... I am hoping to ditch it completely by the end of the year.

Tinkjon ... I think 4.5 is a bit old for a child to be running off when shopping - unless there are other issues of course. Perhaps you should tackle that before the baby comes? Set up a reward chart for shopping or something? Or shop without her? (shopping can be very boring for young children - I give my children 'jobs' to do when we are shopping, a list to hold, a shop to look out for, things to count out into bags etc)

i have a 15mnth age gap between my eldest 2, and we had a double for about 6 months. It rarely got used though as DD1 wanted to walk.

I am pg and due in december, DD2 will be just 2yrs old, and im undecided whether to get a cheap second hand double pushchair for long days out or not. Think I may have to wait and see how DD2 is in september time, as at the moment she varies between wanting to walk and wanting to sit in the pushchair.

DD1 is 3 next month and has used the pushchair 3 times in the last 6 months, twice of which was for long days out and once round the massive car boot sale where i couldnt risk her getting lost.

My middle child was 22 mths when youngest arrived...I did have a double buggy and still do (she is now 3 1/2). However, she walks everywhere and I only use the double when I know we are walking a long way...for instance the preschool is a mile and a half walk each way, too far for her when she has an intoeing gait and inturning knee, so we use the buggy part of the way. Everywhere else we use the single pram, and she either holds my hand or hold the buggy, or I let her walk beside me. She knows she only gets one chance and if she runs off or anything she will get reins on...which I have only had to do once! I will be selling my double buggy this autumn before she is 4 as there will be no need for it by then.

I had a double buggy for my first 2 - 21m gap. But use tailed off very significantly when ds1 was 2.5 if not younger. Definitely didn't use it after age 3. Didn't even contemplate one for the 3 year gap between ds2 and dd.
My youngest ds is 3.5 and although i keep a Maclaren in the car for emegencies, he's been in it twice in the past six months; it's going at the end of the summer. He scoots or he walks. You'd be amazed how quickly their stamina builds up if they know they have to walk, and your dd is ayear older than my ds3. By Septembet I expect him to be capable, easily, of walking just over a mile each day, either to or from school. Each way might be too much but we'll see. Dd certainly managed the same journey on foot at 4.

I have a 3.5 yr old and a 7 month old, no double buggy - just one buggy for the baby, with a buggy board. Works fine, unless dd1 is ultra tired, and we're going a long way.

My DD was 2y 10m when DD2 was born and we have managed without a double buggy.

Hi Tink, I think when your lo is born your dd will probably feel very grown up and want to differentiate herself from all things 'baby'. She'll associate the pram to do with the baby and therefore not want to use it anyway. I have a 5 year gap between my first 2 and this is what I found. Maybe spend the next few months gearing her up to this. I second some of the other ideas, like rewards for being good or a scooter to use. A couple of other ideas: if she does have to use a buggy for whatever reason, could you use a sling for the baby - cheaper than a buggy and would have wider range of uses; and does she have a toy pram/buggy she could push around just like her mum, if not maybe the baby might like to give her one when s/he's born, giving her something to concentrate on and play with when she's out with you.

Have you tried the rucksack reins by Lindam? DS3 is almost 4 and has oplenty of growth in them yet- Argos do them, as do Woolworths

Unless your daughter has severe special needs then she has no need of a buggy at the age of 4.5 years old or even a buggy board.

If she will not walk nicely with you I suggest that you get some baby reins or a wrist strap. If she plays you up by running off the then the humilation of being made to wear a baby's wrist strap will be a good consquence. (ie. If she chooses to act like a baby then she will get treated as one!)

Er, can we not look on reins on 4 year olds as ahumilation please? DS3 is in need of them and I try very ahrd NOT to make him think of them as babyish or a punishment, and I'd rather the kids at nursery with him felt the same. HArdly his fault is it?

baby reins are a method of keeping small chidlren safe. fab. And Hallelujah to that!

kinki it might go the other way. When DD was born DS was 3.3 and had been out of the buggy for some time. I took them both to Ikea and he had a paddy because I had only brought the pram. "Where's my pushchair", like I could push both around Ikea. But he soon settled down and has been fine.

I really don't think a 4.5 yo should need a buggy even to stop them running off but another suggestion would be (asuming you have the sort of pram/buggy that can be sat up easily) is to pop a sling into the shopping basket. Then you could get the baby out of the pram and into the sling and DD into the pushchair. I think a double buggy with a 4.5yo and a newborn in would be very unbalanced.

My DD1 was 19 months when DD2 was born and I didn't have a double buggy so DD1 must have walked everywhere (no car either) I say 'must have' as it was a long time ago so hard to remember.

I always cringe when I see children in pushchairs who are so big their feet are almost dragging on the floor. Also around here the child usually has a bottle of tea in it's mouth as well. Yeah, I'm snobby about that kind of thing

Oooh, Peachy, no I haven't seen those reins but I will definitely look into it, thank you!

You definatly don't need one. She will be fine.
I thought the same thing when dd was due and ds was only 2.5!
I didn't get one. We did get a buggy bosrd though. He's 4.5 now and we're not using that as much. He walks all the way to school, even though he moans a bit. We only use the buggy board if I'm in a massive hurry or its a lot of walking.

Mate was still using a pushchair for her son on school run after he turned 5yo... because otherwise he was going to have to walk 6 miles every day (as the mother had to). And securing cooperation from a tired 5yo to ride a scooter is not always easy.

Of course, if the mother had a license she could have driven those 6 miles every day and nobody would have even hinted the slightest about her or the child being too lazy.

It really depends what's required of the child, whether a buggy is needed.

ds was 3.5 when dd arrived and we bought a kiddiboard but only used it a handful of times. Even though he was light it soon became hard to push uphill and he was happy to walk. The only time he needed wheeling was when he was unwell but we had to go out, at which point we put dd in the Baby Bjorn carrier instead. Otherwise I just got him to hold the frame or my hand when near a road. If you are really concerned then try a backpack with reins built in like here . Personally I'd quietly ditch the buggy now, let her get out of the habit and start to get her to behave better while out. Do you have any breaks , if she is already at school or nursery, in which to do most of the shopping so you cna plan shorter, more controlled trips with her. Play up the big girl thing and offer small rewards (stickers etc) for behaving well , not running off and taking stuff without your approval, so she should n't need any sort of buggy or reins by then.

Agree with peachy about the reins. I always put dd in them if she is walking. Its so much safer and hepls prevent her from falling over over every other step! I can sort of catch her before she hits the ground .

I don't think 4.5 year old need a buggy, they'll get used to walking. My dd is 5 and hasn't been in one for years, ds1 hasn't been in one for many months and he's 3.

My dd was 2.6 yo when my ds was born, i never had a double buggy at all, didnt need one, dd old enough to walk.

my dd was 24mths when dd2 was born, she used a buggy board for about 6 mths then thereafter didnt need one - she walked, holding onto the buggy, i never had any issues of her running off in shopping centres etc

i dont think you will need one Tinkjon, i dont even think you will need a buggy board

I think most children would be out of a buggy by 3 at the latest