For coddy and other mothers of boy gangs

[JanH]

Lovely piece from the Guardian this week - made me laugh! Here.

God, I have drunk too much tonight - check the spelling ( really had to concentrate for this post)

God - funny article and sweet, but talk about stereotyping for mothers of girls though! We aren't all quietly doing 'homecraft' you know!

dh says shes jealous

no sobernow! you are adding fuel to the fire

but you see girls would be toying with you ewaying htey hated oyu /liked you
boys dont do that

hate you/like you stuff doesnt phase me its easy to rise above it. All part of learning to be empathetic/good communicator.

never see articles like this about girls have seen many about the joys of boys...maybe its true and parents really do prefer them

I have 2 boys & got sick & tierd of people asking if I was hoping 4 a girl with my 2nd pregnancy.
I did not care what sex the baby was & was just paranoid that something would be wrong with his health as I found out that ds1 had a multicystic kidney with my 20 wk scan (he is now 5 & fine btw)
I was so happy that all was well at the scan of ds2 that I didn't give a thought 2 asking what the sex was & was very happy when he was born, but other people still felt the need 2 comment on the fact it was another boy & that I must now try 4 a girl etc.
It made me really angry that some people felt the need to give negative comments at such a happy time, rather than see the advantages of having same sex children such as the fact that they enjoy playing with the same toys, have more in common etc.
I always responded by saying "I love my little boy to bits, so why would I not love to have another one?"

This thread has warmed my heart! I love my little boys!! Feeling a bit emotional and it's even made me cry - baby blues I guess!

I just hate the feeling that people are commiserating and feeling sorry for me - even my MIL who while I was pregnant with ds2 and ds3 was always holding up my neices dresses and saying 'don't worry Kate, you'll be able to buy all these nice things soon'. I could happily thump her one!

You know just read this, and I have always been one of the "if i could guarentee a girl, I would go for a third", now I think I will settle with my two very noisy, turtle playing, power ranger mad boys. (mum to 1.5 and 4.5 year olds), Got tear in eye now!

Three boys, one girl! Boys beat the cr.p out of each other all the time, girl whinges then finally snaps. Three boys run screaming (14,11, and 5) as she runs through the house like a whirling dervish, killing everyone in sight with her shrieking, scary voice!!! Friends of 14 year old have been known to blanch at her voice and allowed her into the inner sanctum of teenage bedroom so she won't shriek, "MUUUUUMMMMMM" and let me know what they're up to!! She's like Barbie Doll on some illegal substance, a Ninja Turtle with scary pink nails and serious attitude!! YES, that's MY GIRL!!! But.... it's scary how DADDY is hers and sometimes, yes sometimes, I am jealous, 'cos she cuddles up to him in OUR bed and gives me THAT look. If she was older and not related, I would be seriously worried!! Where do little girls get that look from? I can remeber doing that look with my "Daddy" and know why my lovely mum sometimes got really short with me and told me it was time for bed, my own bed, NOWW!! My Dh is oblivious to her "girly" charms and misses the "barbed" looks-I have to keep telling him that he has to cover up in bed now 'cos she's nine and basically start treating her like a young lady. I'm worried that when he wakes up (as men do, with a stiffy) that she might go into school and say something. Innocently, yes, but in this day and age, scary 'cos it doesn't take much these days to get Social Services involved. I love my boys, even the teenager, but kids are all different. I think you just have to be grateful for what you get-babies are babies and each one is a gift. Thank you God, for all my little horrors!!!

Due with boy no 3 in a month and great to read this thread. Keep the stories coming.

I'd have been in seventh heaven to have added a third boy to our family! As it is, everyday now I thank my lucky stars 'he' turned out to be a 'she' and was followed up with another of the pink persuasion. All children are wonderful.

You know that 'commiserating' I was talking about?? Just been to Tesco (I know I only gave birth on Sunday but had to get out!) and when checkout lady found out I'd had a 3rd boy she said (in her best sympathetic voice) 'ahhh, were you really hoping for a girl?'.

She's lucky I didn't drag her over the counter and beat her to a pulp.

Actually, it's made me quite mad - how many others will say this? I wouldn't swap my little boys for anything.

I think that it is terrible that people feel the need to say such things, Scate.
Why can't they just be happy 4 you & say "congratulations".
It makes me so cross.

Must be something about Tesco,on my first visit after ds3 was born an elderly lady was admiring him at the checkout and I mentioned that he had two older brothers ,her reaction was to say"oh deaar i'm so sorry" I could have socked her one!But actually I find taht kind of reaction quite common really,a friend of mine who has 3 girls never gets any comments like this.

Skate - people just say stupid things.

After I had DD (first was DS), people said 'Oh you don't need to have any more now'. As if the sole intention of having children is try out one of each.

Some friends of mine who've just had a DS after a DD were told that it didn't matter what they had next time.

What ever happenend to people just smiling and saying 'Congratulations!'?

I think that these kind of people must assume that people with more than 1 same sex child, only have another to have the opposite sex or surely they would not feel the need to be so rude.
Saying that, I got a similar response with my 2nd child & it made me very cross that they could not just be pleased 4 us & react in the same positive way that they did when ds1 was born.

No i win this as when ds3 was quite titchy I wnet to m and s ans a woman said
" ah three boys? I had three and one died"
wha do you say to that?!

?? what DO you say? What a bizarre comment!

You're right Blueteddy (love that nickname!) - it's like you must only have had 3 because you were trying for a girl! In fact the woman in Tesco also said 'I know it's early days but do you think you'll try again?'.

Dear me, I think I was quite restrained really as the more I think about it, the crosser I get!!

FWIW - re parents of girls not getting these comments - when DD2 was born, after DD1, I had a couple of cards with consoling remarks like "a daughter's a daughter all your life" as if everybody's ideal is just one of each...

I know lots is down to personality, but in some ways my sons follow the boy sterotype - boisterous, loud, a bit puppylike. There's a mother at my sons' school who unknowingly irritates me. She has two timid, quiet, very well behaved daughters. All three of them are sweet people, but they seem permanently shocked by the boys loudness and energy. The girls will come up to me all wide eyed to report on them ie 'ds is chasing the dog!' or 'ds1 is fighting ds2!' sometimes indeed the boys are being naughty, but often not. Anyway, anything like this makes the mother look sympathetically in my direction, roll her eyes, sigh, mutter about boys and their ways.... ahhhhhhh