My 14 month old won’t eat.

[QueenofmyPrinces]

Desperately looking for other people to share their experirnces because I’m feeling very alone and worrried.

My son has a dairy allergy and because of that, and other potential allergies, weaning has been awful. I think we missed the window of ‘peak interest in food’ and now he’s just not bothered.

Prior to him turning one year old I tried not to let it worry me and kept repeating the mantra that food before one is for fun, but here we are at 14 months and if anything it’s getting worse.

Nothing about weaning has been enjoyable and If I put food in front of him he glances at it and then just looks away. He doesn’t even pick it up, never mind taste or eat it.

It’s getting he down so much. The only things he will eat are:

Coco pops
Sausages
Pasta
Vegetable sticks
Baby pouches
Fish fingers.

I have offered him so many types of food but he’s not remotely interested. I’ve tried all kinds of strategies to try and encourage him to eat but nothing works.

I guess I need to hear that I’m not alone and that things will get better because Im really struggling at the moment. I just don’t know what to do

Are you on Facebook? There’s lots of parent support groups for weaning - there are ones for allergies, ones for picky eaters - lots of good advice and plenty of people in the same boat.

My baby/toddler is the same. Bloody stressful especially when everyone else’s seems to stuff anything and everything in. Mine is a small child which makes me worry. How is yours? If he’s a normal size and meeting milestones I wouldn’t stress too much even though I know it’s hard not to. I think the things he is eating are pretty good - take the pressure off you both and just let him do that for a bit? It is crap though, you’re not the only one x

At 14 months my daughter would eat maybe a half a slice of bread and a few peas each day. She could go days without eating anything. She was a nightmare to wean. She gradually improved after her second birthday and now at 4 eats very well. Your DS sounds like he's not too bad by comparison!

I know it's hard but try not to get frustrated. Just put food in front of him, take it away if not eaten and don't draw attention to it or try to coax him. Some kids eat better on the move so I used to leave some snacks on a plate while she played nearby with varying levels of success.

Watching with interest. My son is also 14 months old and is exactly the same.

My 14 month old is just under 9.7kg so he’s not tiny but his weight gain is very slow. He’s under a Dietician for his allergy who we are seeing next month and I’m dreading it because I know she will start on at me about his weight.

What are we supposed to do though? It’s not like we can force them to eat.

I’ve offered my son all sorts today but all he wants to do is either ignore it or throw it on the floor.

I’m so fed up of cooking for him and nothing being eaten. I dread to think how much of our shopping bill is purely just me buying anything and everything to try and tempt him to eat something. It’s all a complete waste of money though.

My first son, who is 4.5 years old, was a fantastic eater from the outset and would have anything given to him so this is unfamiliar territory and I find it really hard to handle.

I try not to get angry or upset but sometimes it’s impossible not to. I just get so frustrated. I just want him to be interested in food but he couldn’t give a damn about it.

15 month old DD same here.
She'll only eat
Breakfast - Rice Krispies/porridge
Lunch - Ella's crisps/rice cakes
Dinner - Rice/pasta

I try not to worry, & hope as she gets older she'll get more adventurous with it. As long as he is eating something then they say really not to make a big deal so don't react to eating/not eating. He won't starve, so don't panic!

To be honest I think I find it harder because I’m always coming across infants/toddlers who will “eat anything that’s put in front of them” and it makes me feel so disheartened.

I used to belong to a FB group where we all had babies born in the same month and I used to get so upset and tearful when I saw people posting photos of their babies with food all around their mouths with big smiles on their faces. I felt so jealous and just wanted my son to be like that.

He ate a raspberry this evening which is a step in the right direction.

What I’m finding really hard too is the fact he doesn’t eat at the childminders and she’s giving me written tips on what foods I could try as though it’s my fault he’s not eating. She writes her comments and thoughts in his daily diary that we communicate through and it makes me feel like I’m failing. He won’t eat whatever the hell I pack in his lunch box and I hate sending him off and knowing the majority of the food will be coming back home with him

I know @QueenofmyPrinces I know my friends babies are the same, chomping away on apples & carrot sticks. But you're doing the best you can! You're offering him other stuff but sometimes it easier to give what you know will be eaten. Just pack some of the suggestions in small quantities & then what you know he will eat as well & just say that to the lady! You know your son, some are just fussier eaters than others. IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!

You are trying your best, please don't berate yourself. Some babies seem to be very conservative , we all know them. You can't make him eat . We all know grown adults who ate nothing but 5 Rice Krispies a day and have survived . He will gradually get there, either because he needs the calories or because he wants to conform. My rather useless advice is to just plug away, offer choices and try not to worry. His weight is only a worry if he is dropping off his centile.

Honestly I think the things you listed aren't bad at all. My DD refused anything but pre-made pouches before 12 months or so. It wasn't until we took a step back and just served her whatever we were eating that she ended up eating it too. She realised that if she didn't eat then, she wasn't getting anything else.
She still isn't 100% with all food but she knows what she likes/dislikes.
We spent months on end worrying about weaning but it will get easier if you relax, trust me.
Just make sure your DC is getting a multivitamin (I think they should be having one at that ages anyway)

Every other baby I knew ate brilliantly too. Even now my DD is 4.5 I still get irrationally jealous when I see babies eating well! We were under a dietician too who to be honest have fairly useless advice “try feeding her x/y/z” when she wouldn’t eat anything. However she got there in the end and actually eats a pretty balanced diet now and is petite but not underweight. And she had a much poorer diet than your son at her age, and was a lot smaller than he is.

Thank you everyone.

Sometimes I tell myself that I’m not going to give in and he either eats what’s in front of him or he doesn’t eat, but on the other hand I’m so desperate for him to have something that I just throw vegetable sticks and Ella’s pouches at him.

He refused to eat his dinner tonight - we had spaghetti bolognese - so he ended up having a bowl of coco pops instead.....his second of the day.

I just feel ashamed that the best I can do is coco pops for tea. I just feel so shit about myself. I’m trying
my best but it’s not good enough

Honestly I think the main problem you’ve got here is how hard your are on yourself, not what your son is eating. There’s no point being hard line about not giving him more if he doesn’t eat the first meal at this age. Being flexible is the best bet, just go with it. You’re doing all the right things, it’s definitely not your fault. If you’re feeling down, maybe try to find someone to talk to. It seems like this situation is really pressing your “shame” buttons for some reason - do you know why? It is so tough but your son needs you to be as calm and relaxed as you can be, more than he needs a varied diet. Blaming yourself over and over will help no one xxx

It really sounds like you’re doing fine - 14 months was a really picky stage for us (DS also has CMPA) and it coincided with him picking up ALL the bugs from nursery. Honestly (and I’ll wait for the parent of the year award) we used to stick the telly on, give him a platter of bits, and leave him to it. Taking the pressure off and allowing him to eat outside of set mealtimes (ie not sticking him in his high chair and making him sit and eat) made us all more relaxed, and he could eat when he was actually hungry. He’s now two and a half and eats really well (mostly) and is happy to sit at the table with us. So basically hang on in there, do whatever you can to take the stress out of food and mealtimes, and it will get better!

Just sending a hug. My DS is 4 at the end of Jan and has always been a nightmare with food. Never was interested and still isn't. He will sit at the table with food in front of him and play made up little games rather than eat. I have to feed him like a baby or he'd eat nothing. Only eats at nursery if he likes the food. Last week he ate nothing at all for lunch so they made him a special cheese sandwich and a banana which he inhaled because he was hungry. I am trying so hard not to be angry with him but quite frankly its embarrassing. DH and I eat nearly everything. I'm praying he will outgrow it.