How to get my child to listen to me!

[Greywillow12]

Hi I have posted on here before regarding my son's behaviour. Things have some what improved. But one of the main issues Im having is the listing to instructions and following them.

It's worse when we are round at a friend's or cousins. I can't get him to leave! He runs around the house hides himself under beds in cupboards etc. This week I spent over an hour trying to get him to leave his friensds house but he was hiding under a massive bunkbed shouting things at me throwing toys. I couldn't reach him. To get him out.

I have a 6 month DD and she was in her pram screaming as it was past her nap time. In the end the mum just told me to head home and she would bring him back to mine. When he calmed down.

I've never been so embarrassed. What do I do? I feel he has no respect for me?

Tell him the rules before a play date

If you don't leave straight away you won't be going again

Etc

Does work

However his chances of being invited again may well be limited now anyway

You could have tried walking away, saying I am leaving now, goodbye. ( check with friend first as he may still be awkward, and you will have to go.) most likey he will run after you

If that’s faila it’s a bit age dependent. Bribery or taking away of treats ( like the visits)

Personally I would have dragged the beds out and grabbed him by any part of him I could reach and I mean ANY. No way would I ever, EVER put up with that shit (assuming NT child).

How on Earth did it manage to get to the point that he thinks it's even remotely okay to do that?

I do tell him the rules before we go or his friend comes here as they both do it. But the other boy will listen to his mum. But mine never does. They are best friends and just bounce of each other.

They see each other nearly every weekend. It's exhausting though trying to think of things to get him out or having to resort to pulling him out. But then what he's to big to put his shoes and coat on? And the last time he actually ran around outside in his socks to avoid me!

I don't know how it's got to this point he wasnt like this a year ago 😪

If he leaves without shoes then so what?

I think next time he asks for a play date you need to say NO! Because you didn't leave nicely and now you're going to miss out. And mean it.

And stop the best friend thing - does no one any good

Agree that you need to stop play dates for a few weeks and explain it's because he doesn't leave nicely.

Then try again and tell him he leaves or they stop again. He's more likely to believe you and respond if he's had and experienced the consequence you're threatening as hell believe it!

That's what I was thinking stopping them having playdates for a while.

I just don't know were everything has gone wrong. A year ago he was the best behavecd child. Always wanted to be by my side. But now he's playing up in school never listens.

He gets all his privilege's taken away. I tell him what I expect of his behaviour he always says he will. Then we get there and he just go crazy 😐

How old is he? Chances are if behaviour started when he started school he's just overtired and needs calmer weekends and the lesser play dates will help in more than 1 way!